Season 2, Episode 3: Mama Mia
Analysis
There's an old saying about how you shouldn't be so quick to criticise someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes. It gets to the very heart of trying to be empathetic rather than judgement, understanding rather than harsh.
We're all quick to do it - jump to conclusions, take things at face value, and think the grass is greener for someone else. However, until we know exactly what they're going through, then perhaps we should try and exercise more patience and cut folk some slack.
It's the lesson which Erica learns in this particular episode as Dr. Tom sends her back in time to try and understand just how hard it is to look after a newborn baby.
Now, being a guy in my early 20s, I can just about manage to look after myself, so the thought of having the responsibility of looking after a baby totally freaks me out. I don't want to be considering that for another decade or so.
However, for women, I guess it's different. Almost all girls are incredibly maternal, and even those who aren't can grow to become so. It wasn't until recently that I actually realised how this idea of caring and looking after babies is ingrained in girls all their lives.
I mean, think about it. While boys play make believe with their action figures, what do girls do? They look after dolls. Pretend babies. Right from an early age, they are conditioned into understanding that this is something they do and, often, something they want to do.
This episode is all about mothers really. From Judith, trying to find her way in caring for baby Max right through to Barbara, who has been there, done it, got the t-shirt and probably now hoping for some grand kids from her two daughters. She'll have to keep waiting...
Of course, as Erica struggles to look after Max back in 1995, it's to Barbara who Judith recommends she goes to. Someone with experience. However, telling too is that we see Barbara giving advice to Sam on how to keep Josh feeling important when it comes to what to do with her hair.
I think it's a great example of the very clever writing in this particular episode, as what do we see in the present day? Only Sam trying to keep Josh happy with his new important promotion and move to London. And who is not so keen on what she's doing? Her mom.
Of course, it's very possible Sam has got the idea in her head of accepting to live her husband's lifestyle from her mother, certainly from what we saw in '95. However, now the roles are reversed.
Not that Sam is totally in favour of the move, she knows she's the one making the sacrifice, and we've already seen in Season 1 how she can often just go along with things that Josh wants, even if she's not convinced of it herself.
It's shown by the way she breaks down and cries in the car after leaving her Mom's following Barbara expressing her concerns. Interesting too that Erica encouraged her mother to speak our about her worries - just as Dr. Tom implored Erica to before Sam's wedding.
It's also how clever how during her time travel, Erica and Judith almost swap positions. Judith is one who feels alone, abandoned by her friend who seems to moved on without her, and not understanding of what it takes to care for a baby.
Back in the present day, it was Erica feeling as though her friendship with Judith was "on life support" and in need of work. However, on her return, she was better able to understand where Jude was coming from.
She is also reminded of how they have spent time apart before, as Judith recalls back in 1995. Watching it back, too, is there a hint of prolepsis when Judith talks about Erica being a famous author who has moved on without her? Very similar to events in Episode 11.
After being a bit down on the previous episode's time travel, I actually think this is a really fun episode - seeing Jude and Erica struggling to look after their respective youngsters. It was also clever how, after a couple of present day-mentions, Ethan's friend Michael makes an appearance back in '95.
It's also an opportunity for some great mid-1990s tunes, and pay attention to the detail they go to - strands of Erica's hair dyed purple apparently a Frosh Week tradition at the University of Toronto. It's another great example of how well put together Being Erica is.
Having said that though, this was supposed to be "the third regret from the bottom" according to Dr. Tom. Now, we saw the last regret that Erica added in Episode 1, which was "Leo." We then saw her add a couple more in Episode 11 of Season 1.
So unless she's been adding more and more, which is entirely feasible, that we're not aware of then I don't see how Frosh Week could have been the third one from the bottom, as Dr. Tom describes it. That's me being super-pedantic though.
It barely registers a dot on the surface of what is such a great show, and one of the reasons is becase it really does teach you lessons for life. We also see Erica learn and grow at the same time, actually responding to what Dr. Tom is trying to show her.
It's true too, friendships are like any relationships, they need attention and hard work, particularly when other factors play a part to make them more difficult. It's certainly my experience from having been to university and a few different schools.
Having moved around as a kid, I'm no longer in touch with anyone I met before the age of 15. I then went away to university, and met people from all around the UK - who I rarely see now.
Sure, modern technology makes it easier, but actually seeing them in person is hard, and it takes planning and effort.
It's difficult, too, when people's lives take them in different directions and they progress at different speeds. Just as Erica is finding as Jude takes steps into motherhood - something still a long way off for her.
Unfortunately, some friendships don't survive, as the cynical Kai comments. Incidentally, such cynicism at such a young age should really have been a telling sign of his true identity. More on that much later in the season though. However, other friendships do - although they require effort and understanding.
I'm always reminded of one of the only things I ever remember from primary school, when we were told that, "if you want a friend, be a friend." Parent or child, mature mother or wacky aunt, 1995 or 2009, that will always be the case.
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Mama Mia
Season 2, Episode 3: Mama Mia
Episode Guide
Erica is in the kitchen of her apartment, preparing brunch. She goes to the fridge and sees a photo of Judith holding baby Max and smiles. She narrates:
"Friends. They're the people who get you, support you, understand you in ways that others just don't. They're the people you share your life with, but what happens when your life starts to change?"
Ethan then joins her, and tries to take a piece of bacon to eat. Erica smacks his hand away. He asks for one piece, seeing as he's got a six hour drive ahead of him, but she tells him it is for Judith.
He pleads with her and Erica reminds him that he's the one abandoning her for the weekend - to go to his cousin's stag-do - so he shouldn't guilt her out. However, she eventually relents and feeds him one piece, telling him the rest of the bacon and scones are for Judith.
Ethan suggests she's really going all out, and Erica admits she's anxious - which confuses him. Erica says that she can't remember the last time they hung out, compared to when they used to see each other all the time and talk every day.
He reminds her that Judith does have a newborn baby, and Erica comments that she knows but that, every time they make plans, Judith cancels. Ethan recalls how when his friend Michael had kids they went from drinking buddies to "playground patrol."
Erica suggests that they stayed friends though, and Ethan adds that they to make a few adjustments.
She begins to put the scones in a dish when her phone rings. Erica notices Judith is calling her from home and panics, wondering what this means. She answers, and Judith bemoans why babies aren't born with teeth.
Erica guesses she is referring to breast feeding, and Judith informs her she got just three hours sleep. She supposes that Judith is going to have to cancel, but Judith insists she promised she wouldn't.
They arrange to meet up that afternoon at Goblins as Judith has baby yoga to attend nearby.
She hangs up, and Ethan asks Erica if she's OK, and she presents him the scones and bacon for his trip to Montreal before they kiss.
Later, Erica arrives at Goblins to find Judith and Max already sitting at a table. Pleased to see one another, they hug and agree that they've never gone as long without seeing one another. Erica sits down and Judith, having already got her a vanilla latte, tells her she wants to know everything - and asks how Ethan is.
Erica explains that things are good, despite a "weird thing" at Sam's birthday. She begins to tell Judith about Ethan being in Montreal for the weekend when Max starts crying and Judith begins to tend to him.
Despite this, Erica continues to talk about Ethan, expressing her anxiety that Claire is in Montreal, too, and Judith suggests she is obsessing over things which aren't actually happening.
At that moment, Judith's friends Alison and Marie, also there for baby yoga, arrive, and ask to join her and Erica. She appears to be a bit put out by them joining, but Erica nevertheless continues her conversation and disagrees that she's obsessing, although she insists she does want Judith's opinion.
Judith is busy trying to breast feed Max though - and is in pain as he continues to bite her. Alison wonders why baby aren't born with teeth, and Judith comments that she said that same thing to Erica.
Erica then glances over to the counter where Kai is working and they smile at one another. Meanwhile, Judith, Alison, and Marie are all talking about baby-related topics and Judith asks if they're pacifying, which Alison informs her they are because Marie's mother is very pro-pacifier.
Trying to involve herself in the conversation, Erica quips that that would make her a "pacifist," although they fail to see the funny side. Judith continues, explaining how she disagrees with pacifiers as she believes babies need the opportunity to practise self soothing.
Erica nods along, without really understanding, as Judith rants about pacifiers being unhygienic and disgusting. As the three others become engrossed in their baby discussion, Erica wanders up the counter to talk to Kai.
He offers her something to eat, although she orders just a water - which she admits is an excuse to leave the table. She puts her head in her hands and Kai wonders if she's tired. Erica replies that she is - having just got in from 1992 the other day where the air is much cleaner.
Kai refuses to take this bait, and Erica remarks that he really doesn't want to talk about therapy. Instead, he points over to her table and suggests they talk about her friend, describing Judith as "the one who's ignoring" Erica.
Erica explains that she is her best friend - and used to be terrified by kids. Kai says that things change, and, unconvincingly, she tells him that it's good and she's happy for Judith. Kai laughs at this remark though, and doubts Erica.
She insists that she is happy for Judith, but Kai replies that she isn't and he understands why. He suggests that kids come along and people forget their friends. Kai muses that a lot of marriages don't survive kids and bets that even more friendships don't.
Annoyed, Erica asks him how he'd know, commenting that he barely looks like he's out of high school. She thanks him for the water and glances back over at the table.
"Friendships like everything else are not immune to change. The question is, how do you keep a friendship together when your lives are pulling you apart?"
Afterwards, Erica and Judith, along with Max in his baby carriage, are walking through a park. Judith apologises for getting sucked into the "mom talk" and Erica assures it's her OK. Judith reminds Erica that she was beginning to tell her about Ethan, and Erica resumes the conversation.
She describes how lots of little things are starting to "add up" and Judith compares it to how she has to remind Anthony to remember to bring the diaper bag every day. Erica is unsure whether this is a good comparison though.
Judith's phone then rings, where Anthony calls to inform her his mother has a cold, although she can still babysit if needed. Judith says she doesn't want her taking care of Max if she's sick and Anthony suggests she could always stay at home. Judith insists she doesn't want to and will figure it out.
Erica asks what's going on, and Judith explains that Anthony is giving a speech at the bank's diversity dinner in four hours and she's just lost the only babysitter she trusts. Erica volunteers to do it, but Judith replies that Max is teething and being really difficult.
She assures Judith that she used to babysit all the time and can handle it - as long as Judith trusts her. Judith says she does, but she is just really precise about Max's schedule. Erica jokes that she knows schedules as she's being taking the bus since 1987.
Persuaded, Judith asks Erica if she can make it for 6:30pm and Erica tells her she can arrive early. Judith thanks her, although is clearly a little hesitant about the idea.
Later that day, Erica is on the phone to her mom who is surprised that she is babysitting and asks how old Max is. Erica - who is reading a babysitting book - wonders why no-one believes she's an amazing babysitter, reminding her mom she used to babysit Sam.
Barbara points out that Sam was eight at the time and Max is a baby. She says she's sure Erica will do fine, although Erica suggests that her mom doesn't sound convinced about this. She then apologises for missing the dinner they'd arranged to have before hanging up.
As Barbara ends her call with Erica, Sam arrives at the house returning some Tupperware she'd borrowed. She asks Sam what she's doing for dinner and, when informed that Josh was going to barbecue, suggests Sam stays and has the lasagna she had prepared for Erica.
Sam replies that she and Josh have a lot to do at home, and Barbara offers to help them. Forced into telling her mom the truth, Sam reveals that they're moving to London and about Josh's promotion to Senior VP.
Barbara is stunned, and checks Sam means London, England. Sam insists it's good news, which Barbara agrees, although suggesting it's a big change. She asks Sam what she will do about her work, and Sam replies there are hospitals in London and there are worse things than getting European certification and a couple of years of overseas experience.
Her mom is surprised to hear it would be that long, but Sam tells her not to be so "judgy" and "Erica" and to be happy for them. Barbara responds that, if it is what Sam wants, she is happy for her and they hug as Sam insists it is what she wants.
At Judith's house, Erica is with baby Max as Judith explains to her how breast milk shouldn't be put in the microwave and Anthony, entering, jokes that Judith will come after her if she wastes a drop of it.
Erica assures them she's all over it, explaining how she knows breast milk goes in warm water until it reaches body temperature. Anthony is impressed by this knowledge and Erica explains how she's prepared and done her research, and she holds up her "Best Friend's Guide To Babysitting" book.
Judith instructs Erica that Max's bedtime is 7pm on the dot - otherwise he gets overtired. Anthony suggests Erica just need to keep Max alive, but Judith insists she's not joking and that that if Max gets overtired he won't be able to sleep.
Erica is adamant that she understands, and Judith warns her that if she hasn't then Max will be off for days. Judith and Anthony's cab then pulls up outside and they get ready to go, with Judith telling Erica that, once she has put Max down, not to pick him up as she is teaching him to self soothe.
She says not to use any props, or pacifiers, and not to rock him to sleep. Erica replies that research also says that at a certain point a mother has to just go and have some fun. Judith and Anthony then go, with Erica telling Max that "Crazy Aunt Erica" is smarter than Judith thinks she is.
At Barbara's house, the phone rings and she answers to find Erica telling her that her and Max have made it to bedtime without a single tear. Barbara exclaims that this is wonderful and, Erica, sitting on the couch with Max in her arms, adds that snuggling a warm baby is hardly the rough job mothers make it out to be.
Barbara rolls her eyes at this comment and explains how Sam came over to eat her lasagna and she then asks Sam to go down to the basement to fetch her some more paper towel. When she has gone, she informs Erica of Sam and Josh's move to London.
Erica can't believe this, commenting that Sam could hardly handle going to camp and is pleased for Sam. Barbara replies that it's for Josh's promotion, which Erica isn't surprised about.
Barbara suggests that Sam is acting excited but she doesn't think she's that into it and Erica advises her to express her worries to Sam. Her mom remarks how defensive Sam can get, but Erica implores her to, saying Barbara's opinion matters to Sam and if she thinks it's the wrong decision than she needs to speak out.
Erica then spots the time and says she has to take Max to bed so says goodbye to her mom. She takes Max and puts him in his crib, kissing him goodnight. She tells him not to tell his mom it's 7:10pm, and wishes him goodnight.
He begins crying as she leave his room and shuts the door though, and Erica waits on the other side of the door, listening to him. She debates whether to go back inside, telling herself not to, but then can't resist returning.
She opens the door and tells Max that he is breaking her heart. Erica eventually decides to pick Max up again, kissing him, and suggesting that he hangs out with her a little longer.
Meanwhile, Anthony is finishing up his speech at the dinner and, afterwards, Judith mingles with some of the other people there. She overhears two women having a conversation about a company she used to work for and interjects.
They then ask her where she's working now and, after failing to get Judith's joke, she explains that she is on maternity leave. They unenthusiastically congratulate her on this and Judith asks about a case that she had been working on before giving birth.
She discovers it has been settled and they then ask her about another lawsuit, but Judith admits she isn't aware of it - despite being informed that it's all over the news. She jokes that she will have to buy a paper - and then find time to read it.
The women resume their conversation, leaving Judith feeling left out and she walks away, and gets her phone out of her purse. She calls Erica, who is sitting on the couch with Max, and is relieved when Erica tells her everything is fine.
However, she then hears Max making a noise, and Erica admits that, while everything is fine, he just needed a little more tiring out. Judith remarks that it's nearly 8pm and reminds Erica that she told her to put him to bed at 7pm.
Erica replies that she knows, but explains that Max had been crying. Judith reminds her that this was to be expected seeing as Max is a baby. She sighs and wonders why it's always so hard for Erica to follow through. Erica tells her to calm down.
Judith continues though, commenting that it is so hard for Erica to follow a simple rule and wonders about what she'd have done if something serious had happened. Erica suggests that Judith should come back if she thinks she is such a risk to her child and Judith replies she'll be back in 20 minutes before hanging up.
Erica is shocked at this, and tells Max that he will have to go straight to bed because his mom has lost her mind. She opens the door to his bedroom but, instead, finds herself walking into Dr. Tom's office.
He is crouched down on the floor, playing with a baby's bassinet, as Erica enters - exclaiming that cave people raised babies and wondering what the big deal is about Max being a few minutes late for bed is, commenting that he can't tell time anyway.
Dr. Tom stands up and remarks that Erica can and suggests that she was supposed to have put Max down by 7pm. She questions whose side he is on and he replies that he's on the side which makes him wonder whether Erica is in a mood over her friend's parenting style or something more.
Erica tells him that, seeing as she has Max, now isn't the best time, but insists they do need to talk about Kai, who she tells him is a fellow patient. Dr. Tom asks if he can hold Max, and Erica allows him to as she sits down, explaining how Kai is going through what she is and how he doesn't want to talk about it.
She asks Dr. Tom, who sits down opposite her with Max, whether this is weird, but he replies that he's not going to gossip with her about other patients. He reminds her that in his office they talk about her. Dr. Tom then instructs her to look at the third regret from the bottom of her list.
Erica looks at it, recoiling in displeasure and asks him again if they can just talk about Kai instead. Dr. Tom replies no, and asks her to tell him about Frosh Week.
She explains that it was her second year at university and she'd just moved into a house off campus with Ethan and a couple of other students and that Judith and her had supposed to have been Frosh leaders.
Erica recalls how she had insisted signing them both up for it, although Judith didn't want to, before bailing on her. She describes how, over the summer, she had read up on women's theory and, by the time Frosh Week came, she really wanted to commit herself to women's issues.
She recalls whipping off her shirt in a public rally and marching around campus until getting majorly sunburned. Dr. Tom, ironically, suggests that this was much more dignified than Frosh Week, and Erica concedes that, at the time, it had seemed to matter.
He asks her about Judith, and she explains how she left her to manage a massive group of 30 Frosh kids single handed. She says that Judith stuck it out after Erica had bailed, despite hating every second of it.
Erica comments that, ever since, there's been a dynamic between them where Judith is the grown up and her the flake. She points to not even being trusted to look after Max for a few hours and confesses to Dr. Tom that while her and Judith are supposed to be best friends, she never sees her anymore.
She says their friendship is on life support and Dr. Tom advises that she goes back and resuscitates it. Suddenly, Erica spins around and finds herself back in 1995. She is in the lounge of her house where Judith is raging at her and describing her as juvenile.
Realising where she is, Erica calms Judith down and insists she's not doing Feminist Frosh Week anymore and will be staying with her. Just then, they hear a baby crying and both look down to where Max is lying on the floor.
Shocked, Erica picks him up and Judith comments if the baby is some kind of Frosh Week hazing joke that she's not laughing. Erica insists she isn't joking and Judith wonders why she is babysitting as Erica introduces her to Max.
Jude accuses Erica of bailing on doing Frosh Week with her but says it's no problem when one of Erica's "girl buddies" needs help. Erica assures Judith she's there for her and isn't bailing. She asks Judith to hold Max while she goes and freshens up, joking they look cute together. Judith reminds Erica she can't stand babies and asks Max where his mother is.
Later, Erica is holding Max as Judith tries to organise a car wash. She instructs Erica where to help out, but Erica wonders whether, seeing as Max is cranky, she can just stick to supervising. Judith reminds her that she said she'd be there for her.
Erica puts a t-shirt down on the grass and lays Max don it as she picks up a hose. However, she soon has to pick up him again as he cries and cradles him as she tries to think of a song to soothe him.
At the same time, a guy and a girl taking part in the car wash get into a water fight and the guy throws a sponge which narrowly misses Erica and Max. She turns around and berates him, but Judith reminds her that she has brought a baby to a car wash.
Judith then notices that Max is smelling and needs his diaper changing and Erica asks Judith for two minutes to do so. After finishing changing him, she goes to throw away the used diaper but misses the garbage and it ends up landing on a car hood.
This angers the car's owner who Erica apologises to, and Judith apologises for Erica before telling her and Max to go and disposing of the diaper herself.
Erica heads to get some baby supplies for Max, and pushes him out of the store in the shopping cart. However, she is then apprehended by Dr. Tom, dressed as a policeman, who informs her that stealing a cart is against the law.
She is unhappy at him, and replies that she's borrowing it and brands him unbelievable and a disgrace to his uniform. Dr. Tom picks up some of the diapers Erica has bought, and suggests that such a small body has a lot of needs.
Erica reminds him she came back to show Judith she's not a flake and instead she is a baby-toting flake, which she argues is much worse. Erica says she wants Max back where he belongs and insists she can't do what she came back for.
Dr. Tom agrees with her, but tells her she can do what he brought her back for. Erica asks him what that is and he replies, "Diaper backwards spells 'repaid.' Think about it," before walking off to leave Erica wondering.
Back at her house, Erica is asleep on the couch with Max - being watched by Michael and Judith. He suggests that she has to move out, but Ethan comes in and reminds him that Erica only has Max for a few days. However, Michael complains that, with the smell the baby makes, he can't bring girls home.
Erica then wakes up, surprised to see she has an audience watching her. Judith tells her to go back to sleep and says she will do 'pub night' herself, lamenting that she only has to hand out six carton of condoms all by herself. Erica says she promised herself she wouldn't cancel and insists she and Max will come with Judith.
Judith suggests that Erica leaves Max at home in bed though, wondering whether Ethan wouldn't mind looking after him. However, Ethan replies that he's not comfortable looking after someone else's baby and Michael then drags him away to go to a party.
Erica assures Judith that everything will be fine and they'll have a good time at the pub with Max asleep on her shoulder.
At the pub, Erica, holding Max, introduces the next event of the evening which she tells everyone is the "Best Ass." A crying Max keeps diverting her attention though - which makes some of the audience restless and Erica assures them he's just tired.
One of the contestants in the competition then suggests he needs to be in bed and Erica, angered, recommends that someone in the "Best Ass" contest shouldn't be passing judgement. Judith pulls Erica to one side and asks what she's doing and Erica explains that Max is teething and tired and she thinks she needs to take him back home to bed.
Annoyed, Judith reminds Erica it was her idea for them to be Frosh leaders and she only did it for Erica. She continues, saying she did the car wash and reiterates her belief that looking after Max is stupid.
Erica wonders whether Judith thinks she should have just left Max at home and reminds her when Judith suggests getting a babysitter that that's exactly what she is. Judith tells Erica to take Max back to his mother, giving her some condoms to take to her as well.
She accuses Erica of flaking out on her and doesn't believe her when she insists that that's not the case. Irritated, Erica tells Judith she has a baby that needs to go to bed and her yelling is not making the situation any better or helping. Judith, frustrated, tells Erica to go and that she'll be fine by herself.
Back home, Erica tries in vain to get Max to stop crying while Judith struggles to maintain control teenagers being sick. Eventually the police turn up to the pub and Erica takes to using a blow dryer to try and quieten Max down.
Michael comes into the room and unplugs the blow dryer, and suggests to Erica that he is going to pass out from the heat. She points to it stopping Max from crying, but he rants at her saying Ethan had said she was an awesome roommate but now he doesn't want to live with chicks because their lives are too complicated.
Erica points the blow dryer at him, telling Michael to stop yelling, but he suggests she should go and live someplace else. Ethan then comes in and tells Michael to back off, but Michael storms off saying that either Max leaves tomorrow or he will go.
Struggling not to cry, Erica thanks Ethan for being there and tries to offload Max onto him. However, he informs her he's too loaded and can barely stand so can't take care of Max.
Come the morning, Erica is outside in the front yard, not having got any sleep, bouncing Max up and down while making noises. Judith them comes storming back from the pub and yells at Erica, asking if she has any idea what's she been doing all night.
Erica tries to quieten Judith down as she keeps up her bouncing routine with Max. Judith sees what a bad state she is in and wonders if Max is OK. Erica illustrates to her that if she stops her routine then Max cries. Judith tells her she can't go on and that she is calling her a cab.
In the cab, Erica, holding Max, sits next to Judith in the back and asks where they are going. Judith tells her they are going to see Barbara, as she will know what to do.
Erica then recalls that at Frosh Week the previous year they had had so much fun, reminding Judith how they were chased by the cops after driving into a fountain. Judith wonders how within a year Erica could have dumped her for her feminist friends, which Erica denies.
Judith insists it is the case, calling it Erica's "speciality." She tells Erica she just wishes she could understand why Max and his mother are more important to Erica than her, and says she doesn't even know who Erica is anymore. Erica replies that she's still the same person, but just trying to deal with her situation.
Max begins to cry and Judith, once more, says he needs to home. Erica tells her that what she needs is some patience and support, causing Judith to question why everyone acts like taking care of children is the hardest thing ever. Erica chuckles at this comment.
She tells Judith she has no idea what she is talking about and to wait until she has a baby. Judith exclaims that there's fat chance of that happening and Erica smiles knowingly to herself.
At Erica's parents', Barbara is in the kitchen talking to Sam, who explains her friend Stephanie has told her that she doesn't have to wear her hair as Josh prefers. Barbara reminds her that Stephanie isn't Josh's girlfriend and that, when you love someone, it's nice to make them happy.
She then sees Erica and Judith enter with Max, and Barbara, puzzled, asks Erica what she's doing with a baby. Erica explains that she's babysitting and Judith comments that she needs help and some experienced hands. Barbara replies that she has a set and takes Max from Erica.
Soon afterwards, Max is lying in a crib, watched by Erica and Judith. Barbara enters with a pacifier she has taken from a Baby Shower gift she has bought for some friends and sterilised. She puts it in Max's mouth, pronouncing that the sleeping can now begin.
Erica tells her that Max's mother really doesn't want her using a pacifier, but Barbara tells Erica she was hooked on them and turned out OK. She informs Erica she liked her sleep, and Erica admits she does too. Barbara then leaves to go to work, instructing Erica to call Max's mom.
Her and Judith then quietly back out of the room and close the door. Max begins to cry and Judith offers to go back to him, but Erica tells her he's learning to self soothe. They make their way into the kitchen, where Erica thanks Judith for making her come and see her mom, and Judith questions who would leave a crazy girl having a meltdown with a baby.
They then hear that Max has stopped crying, and Erica suggests all he needed was a few minutes to cool down, with Judith adding a pacifier too - to Erica's surprise.
Judith remarks to Erica that they are spending their first time alone together since last spring, which Erica struggles to believe. She says they used to spend days together at high school and Erica replies that ten years from now they'll still be hanging out and laughing about this experience.
She suggests Erica can't possibly know this, wondering what would happen if Erica hits 30 and is a famous author and they don't have anything in common anymore. Erica replies that it won't happen and tells Judith she is one of the most important people in the world to her and that she is her best friend. They nudge one another and laugh.
Later, Erica is sitting alone drinking coffee in the kitchen when she hears a knock at the door. She answers it to find Dr. Tom, who instantly comments on how quiet the house is and Erica explains how Judith is crashed out on the couch and how Max is sleeping too.
She takes him to see Max, joking that she will be buying her mom the biggest mother's day gift ever. Dr. Tom suggests looking after a baby is not as easy at it looks and Erica agrees that the amount of havoc a little person can cause is unreal.
Erica admits that she had no idea and he reminds her that Judith didn't either, added to the fact she had to give birth. They both lean on the crib and Erica says that for Judith to have her life changed so radically must have been bewildering.
She reflects that everything her friend was good at - ligation, case law, and lunching with clients has been replaced with chaos, albeit beautiful chaos.
Dr. Tom then asks her what she needed the most when a baby had been attached to her every moment and Erica replies that she needed people to give her time and to give her and Max room to figure things out.
"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one,'" he tells her and Erica smiles before suddenly finds herself transported back to the present day - sitting next to Max while he lies in the crib in his room.
She then hears Judith and Anthony returning and rushes down the stairs to meet them. She immediately apologises to Judith, saying she was right and that Max's sleeping schedule matters a lot. Judith thanks her and Erica admits that she didn't try hard enough to understand where she was coming from.
Judith concedes that it's really hard if you haven't been there when babies get overtired and Erica recounts tales from a 'friend' about deep knee bends and blow dryers and the crazy lengths she went to get her baby to bed.
Hearing no sound from upstairs, Judith wonders whether he is sleeping and she and Erica head upstairs into his room. Judith explains to Erica how she misses Max whenever she is away and then goes up to his crib to see him sleeping.
She is shocked to see that he has a pacifier in his mouth though, but Erica argues that he's sleeping and Judith herself said he needed to. She fails to see the harm of one pacifier. However, Judith is angry, suggesting that to put Max to bed at 7pm and not use a pacifier were not hard rules for Erica to follow.
Judith remarks that the night has been like their friendship on repeat for years but Erica, annoyed, retorts that for years she has been the screw-up while Judith is perfect. She says people change and she's not the same person she was, and nor is Judith.
Erica insists she's not a screw up and that Judith is most definitely not perfect before storming out and leaving Judith to digest her words.
Making her way home, Erica gets out of a cab onto the sidewalk where she is greeted by Dr. Tom, asking her to sit down next to him on a bench. She bemoans that Kai was right, suggesting that once friends have kids you're on your way to friend divorce.
Dr. Tom says this would be a shame, considering her and Judith share a lot of history but Erica replies that she has tried to see where she is coming from and understand her point of view, but it hasn't been enough.
He suggests that the problem with friendships is that they are a two-way street and Erica wonders what more she can do. Dr. Tom tells her she can wait and, as Erica asks what for, her cell phone begins to ring. He motions with his eyes that this is what she is waiting for.
Erica answers the phone to Judith, who asks if they can meet up at Goblins in 20 minutes, which Erica agrees to. Dr. Tom sits silently, smiling, and Erica gets up and leaves him sitting alone.
Meanwhile, Sam is leaving Barbara's but, as she heads for the door, Barbara asks her to wait and tells her she has been where is. Sam, confused, wonders if she means standing in the foyer with lasagne, but Barbara explains that she lived her father's life, then lived for her kids, but never for herself.
Sam asks what she is talking about, and Barbara questions whether she really wants to move to London. Sam reiterates that it's a great opportunity, although Barbara suggests it only is for Josh. Sam doesn't know what to say, and Barbara tells her that she knows what she is doing and it is a mistake.
Hurt, Sam insists she needs to go and leaves. As she closes the door, Barbara leans up against it and Sam, after getting into her car, begins to break down and cry.
At Goblins, Erica is sitting at a table when Judith arrives. She joins her and explains that, after Erica left, she started thinking about what she had said and how she had acted herself.
Judith states that she doesn't know what's wrong with her, but Erica reminds her that she has a four month old, is tired and anxious, and must be on an insane learning curve. Judith sighs, and admits it's harder than law school.
Erica stresses she is trying to be supportive, but misses Judith, who reciprocates Erica's feelings. She tells Judith that every day there are so many things she wants to tell her, and Judith assures her she wants to hear them, before admitting that she got distracted earlier and is trying to figure out how to pay attention to a million things at once.
She sighs once more, and picks up the conversation about Ethan from the afternoon and Erica explains how, although she is confused and trying to figure things out, she is happy and he is great.
Judith asks about work, and Erica informs her that Julianne and Friedkin are sleeping together before revealing that she has been awarded the biggest title of the year, which Judith is thrilled to hear. She tells Erica that things have really changed and Erica agrees it has for both of them.
She then asks Erica if she can be brutally honest, which Erica tells her she expects nothing less, and Judith confesses that she doesn't feel as if she's really good at being a mother and isn't used to feeling like she sucks at something.
Judith explains how she misses being at work, despite everyone telling her how she should enjoy maternity leave. She admits that Alison, Marie, and Anthony don't know how she feels and tells Erica that she feels as though she is the only person she can tell.
Erica then wonders if Judith remembers the crazy sex dreams she used to have about Professor Lozar and admits to Judith that she still has them sometimes. They both laugh and Erica says she never tells anyone and can't talk to Ethan about it.
She says she has told Judith because they can tell one another everything. Judith agrees, and tells Erica she is going to try harder and make time for her - although Erica understands that sometimes things can get crazy sometimes.
Erica assures Judith she won't get resentful or angry when she can't be there or has to cancel and the wine she has ordered for them is then brought to them by a waiter. They continue to chat and laugh as Erica narrates.
"When life pulls you apart you have to work to stay closer together. By putting yourself in each other's shoes, by reminding each other of who you are, who you were, and who you are becoming.
"By remembering that, despite all the changes that come, there is some things that will always remain the same."
Episode Guide
Erica is in the kitchen of her apartment, preparing brunch. She goes to the fridge and sees a photo of Judith holding baby Max and smiles. She narrates:
"Friends. They're the people who get you, support you, understand you in ways that others just don't. They're the people you share your life with, but what happens when your life starts to change?"
Ethan then joins her, and tries to take a piece of bacon to eat. Erica smacks his hand away. He asks for one piece, seeing as he's got a six hour drive ahead of him, but she tells him it is for Judith.
He pleads with her and Erica reminds him that he's the one abandoning her for the weekend - to go to his cousin's stag-do - so he shouldn't guilt her out. However, she eventually relents and feeds him one piece, telling him the rest of the bacon and scones are for Judith.
Ethan suggests she's really going all out, and Erica admits she's anxious - which confuses him. Erica says that she can't remember the last time they hung out, compared to when they used to see each other all the time and talk every day.
He reminds her that Judith does have a newborn baby, and Erica comments that she knows but that, every time they make plans, Judith cancels. Ethan recalls how when his friend Michael had kids they went from drinking buddies to "playground patrol."
Erica suggests that they stayed friends though, and Ethan adds that they to make a few adjustments.
She begins to put the scones in a dish when her phone rings. Erica notices Judith is calling her from home and panics, wondering what this means. She answers, and Judith bemoans why babies aren't born with teeth.
Erica guesses she is referring to breast feeding, and Judith informs her she got just three hours sleep. She supposes that Judith is going to have to cancel, but Judith insists she promised she wouldn't.
They arrange to meet up that afternoon at Goblins as Judith has baby yoga to attend nearby.
She hangs up, and Ethan asks Erica if she's OK, and she presents him the scones and bacon for his trip to Montreal before they kiss.
Later, Erica arrives at Goblins to find Judith and Max already sitting at a table. Pleased to see one another, they hug and agree that they've never gone as long without seeing one another. Erica sits down and Judith, having already got her a vanilla latte, tells her she wants to know everything - and asks how Ethan is.
Erica explains that things are good, despite a "weird thing" at Sam's birthday. She begins to tell Judith about Ethan being in Montreal for the weekend when Max starts crying and Judith begins to tend to him.
Despite this, Erica continues to talk about Ethan, expressing her anxiety that Claire is in Montreal, too, and Judith suggests she is obsessing over things which aren't actually happening.
At that moment, Judith's friends Alison and Marie, also there for baby yoga, arrive, and ask to join her and Erica. She appears to be a bit put out by them joining, but Erica nevertheless continues her conversation and disagrees that she's obsessing, although she insists she does want Judith's opinion.
Judith is busy trying to breast feed Max though - and is in pain as he continues to bite her. Alison wonders why baby aren't born with teeth, and Judith comments that she said that same thing to Erica.
Erica then glances over to the counter where Kai is working and they smile at one another. Meanwhile, Judith, Alison, and Marie are all talking about baby-related topics and Judith asks if they're pacifying, which Alison informs her they are because Marie's mother is very pro-pacifier.
Trying to involve herself in the conversation, Erica quips that that would make her a "pacifist," although they fail to see the funny side. Judith continues, explaining how she disagrees with pacifiers as she believes babies need the opportunity to practise self soothing.
Erica nods along, without really understanding, as Judith rants about pacifiers being unhygienic and disgusting. As the three others become engrossed in their baby discussion, Erica wanders up the counter to talk to Kai.
He offers her something to eat, although she orders just a water - which she admits is an excuse to leave the table. She puts her head in her hands and Kai wonders if she's tired. Erica replies that she is - having just got in from 1992 the other day where the air is much cleaner.
Kai refuses to take this bait, and Erica remarks that he really doesn't want to talk about therapy. Instead, he points over to her table and suggests they talk about her friend, describing Judith as "the one who's ignoring" Erica.
Erica explains that she is her best friend - and used to be terrified by kids. Kai says that things change, and, unconvincingly, she tells him that it's good and she's happy for Judith. Kai laughs at this remark though, and doubts Erica.
She insists that she is happy for Judith, but Kai replies that she isn't and he understands why. He suggests that kids come along and people forget their friends. Kai muses that a lot of marriages don't survive kids and bets that even more friendships don't.
Annoyed, Erica asks him how he'd know, commenting that he barely looks like he's out of high school. She thanks him for the water and glances back over at the table.
"Friendships like everything else are not immune to change. The question is, how do you keep a friendship together when your lives are pulling you apart?"
Afterwards, Erica and Judith, along with Max in his baby carriage, are walking through a park. Judith apologises for getting sucked into the "mom talk" and Erica assures it's her OK. Judith reminds Erica that she was beginning to tell her about Ethan, and Erica resumes the conversation.
She describes how lots of little things are starting to "add up" and Judith compares it to how she has to remind Anthony to remember to bring the diaper bag every day. Erica is unsure whether this is a good comparison though.
Judith's phone then rings, where Anthony calls to inform her his mother has a cold, although she can still babysit if needed. Judith says she doesn't want her taking care of Max if she's sick and Anthony suggests she could always stay at home. Judith insists she doesn't want to and will figure it out.
Erica asks what's going on, and Judith explains that Anthony is giving a speech at the bank's diversity dinner in four hours and she's just lost the only babysitter she trusts. Erica volunteers to do it, but Judith replies that Max is teething and being really difficult.
She assures Judith that she used to babysit all the time and can handle it - as long as Judith trusts her. Judith says she does, but she is just really precise about Max's schedule. Erica jokes that she knows schedules as she's being taking the bus since 1987.
Persuaded, Judith asks Erica if she can make it for 6:30pm and Erica tells her she can arrive early. Judith thanks her, although is clearly a little hesitant about the idea.
Later that day, Erica is on the phone to her mom who is surprised that she is babysitting and asks how old Max is. Erica - who is reading a babysitting book - wonders why no-one believes she's an amazing babysitter, reminding her mom she used to babysit Sam.
Barbara points out that Sam was eight at the time and Max is a baby. She says she's sure Erica will do fine, although Erica suggests that her mom doesn't sound convinced about this. She then apologises for missing the dinner they'd arranged to have before hanging up.
As Barbara ends her call with Erica, Sam arrives at the house returning some Tupperware she'd borrowed. She asks Sam what she's doing for dinner and, when informed that Josh was going to barbecue, suggests Sam stays and has the lasagna she had prepared for Erica.
Sam replies that she and Josh have a lot to do at home, and Barbara offers to help them. Forced into telling her mom the truth, Sam reveals that they're moving to London and about Josh's promotion to Senior VP.
Barbara is stunned, and checks Sam means London, England. Sam insists it's good news, which Barbara agrees, although suggesting it's a big change. She asks Sam what she will do about her work, and Sam replies there are hospitals in London and there are worse things than getting European certification and a couple of years of overseas experience.
Her mom is surprised to hear it would be that long, but Sam tells her not to be so "judgy" and "Erica" and to be happy for them. Barbara responds that, if it is what Sam wants, she is happy for her and they hug as Sam insists it is what she wants.
At Judith's house, Erica is with baby Max as Judith explains to her how breast milk shouldn't be put in the microwave and Anthony, entering, jokes that Judith will come after her if she wastes a drop of it.
Erica assures them she's all over it, explaining how she knows breast milk goes in warm water until it reaches body temperature. Anthony is impressed by this knowledge and Erica explains how she's prepared and done her research, and she holds up her "Best Friend's Guide To Babysitting" book.
Judith instructs Erica that Max's bedtime is 7pm on the dot - otherwise he gets overtired. Anthony suggests Erica just need to keep Max alive, but Judith insists she's not joking and that that if Max gets overtired he won't be able to sleep.
Erica is adamant that she understands, and Judith warns her that if she hasn't then Max will be off for days. Judith and Anthony's cab then pulls up outside and they get ready to go, with Judith telling Erica that, once she has put Max down, not to pick him up as she is teaching him to self soothe.
She says not to use any props, or pacifiers, and not to rock him to sleep. Erica replies that research also says that at a certain point a mother has to just go and have some fun. Judith and Anthony then go, with Erica telling Max that "Crazy Aunt Erica" is smarter than Judith thinks she is.
At Barbara's house, the phone rings and she answers to find Erica telling her that her and Max have made it to bedtime without a single tear. Barbara exclaims that this is wonderful and, Erica, sitting on the couch with Max in her arms, adds that snuggling a warm baby is hardly the rough job mothers make it out to be.
Barbara rolls her eyes at this comment and explains how Sam came over to eat her lasagna and she then asks Sam to go down to the basement to fetch her some more paper towel. When she has gone, she informs Erica of Sam and Josh's move to London.
Erica can't believe this, commenting that Sam could hardly handle going to camp and is pleased for Sam. Barbara replies that it's for Josh's promotion, which Erica isn't surprised about.
Barbara suggests that Sam is acting excited but she doesn't think she's that into it and Erica advises her to express her worries to Sam. Her mom remarks how defensive Sam can get, but Erica implores her to, saying Barbara's opinion matters to Sam and if she thinks it's the wrong decision than she needs to speak out.
Erica then spots the time and says she has to take Max to bed so says goodbye to her mom. She takes Max and puts him in his crib, kissing him goodnight. She tells him not to tell his mom it's 7:10pm, and wishes him goodnight.
He begins crying as she leave his room and shuts the door though, and Erica waits on the other side of the door, listening to him. She debates whether to go back inside, telling herself not to, but then can't resist returning.
She opens the door and tells Max that he is breaking her heart. Erica eventually decides to pick Max up again, kissing him, and suggesting that he hangs out with her a little longer.
Meanwhile, Anthony is finishing up his speech at the dinner and, afterwards, Judith mingles with some of the other people there. She overhears two women having a conversation about a company she used to work for and interjects.
They then ask her where she's working now and, after failing to get Judith's joke, she explains that she is on maternity leave. They unenthusiastically congratulate her on this and Judith asks about a case that she had been working on before giving birth.
She discovers it has been settled and they then ask her about another lawsuit, but Judith admits she isn't aware of it - despite being informed that it's all over the news. She jokes that she will have to buy a paper - and then find time to read it.
The women resume their conversation, leaving Judith feeling left out and she walks away, and gets her phone out of her purse. She calls Erica, who is sitting on the couch with Max, and is relieved when Erica tells her everything is fine.
However, she then hears Max making a noise, and Erica admits that, while everything is fine, he just needed a little more tiring out. Judith remarks that it's nearly 8pm and reminds Erica that she told her to put him to bed at 7pm.
Erica replies that she knows, but explains that Max had been crying. Judith reminds her that this was to be expected seeing as Max is a baby. She sighs and wonders why it's always so hard for Erica to follow through. Erica tells her to calm down.
Judith continues though, commenting that it is so hard for Erica to follow a simple rule and wonders about what she'd have done if something serious had happened. Erica suggests that Judith should come back if she thinks she is such a risk to her child and Judith replies she'll be back in 20 minutes before hanging up.
Erica is shocked at this, and tells Max that he will have to go straight to bed because his mom has lost her mind. She opens the door to his bedroom but, instead, finds herself walking into Dr. Tom's office.
He is crouched down on the floor, playing with a baby's bassinet, as Erica enters - exclaiming that cave people raised babies and wondering what the big deal is about Max being a few minutes late for bed is, commenting that he can't tell time anyway.
Dr. Tom stands up and remarks that Erica can and suggests that she was supposed to have put Max down by 7pm. She questions whose side he is on and he replies that he's on the side which makes him wonder whether Erica is in a mood over her friend's parenting style or something more.
Erica tells him that, seeing as she has Max, now isn't the best time, but insists they do need to talk about Kai, who she tells him is a fellow patient. Dr. Tom asks if he can hold Max, and Erica allows him to as she sits down, explaining how Kai is going through what she is and how he doesn't want to talk about it.
She asks Dr. Tom, who sits down opposite her with Max, whether this is weird, but he replies that he's not going to gossip with her about other patients. He reminds her that in his office they talk about her. Dr. Tom then instructs her to look at the third regret from the bottom of her list.
Erica looks at it, recoiling in displeasure and asks him again if they can just talk about Kai instead. Dr. Tom replies no, and asks her to tell him about Frosh Week.
She explains that it was her second year at university and she'd just moved into a house off campus with Ethan and a couple of other students and that Judith and her had supposed to have been Frosh leaders.
Erica recalls how she had insisted signing them both up for it, although Judith didn't want to, before bailing on her. She describes how, over the summer, she had read up on women's theory and, by the time Frosh Week came, she really wanted to commit herself to women's issues.
She recalls whipping off her shirt in a public rally and marching around campus until getting majorly sunburned. Dr. Tom, ironically, suggests that this was much more dignified than Frosh Week, and Erica concedes that, at the time, it had seemed to matter.
He asks her about Judith, and she explains how she left her to manage a massive group of 30 Frosh kids single handed. She says that Judith stuck it out after Erica had bailed, despite hating every second of it.
Erica comments that, ever since, there's been a dynamic between them where Judith is the grown up and her the flake. She points to not even being trusted to look after Max for a few hours and confesses to Dr. Tom that while her and Judith are supposed to be best friends, she never sees her anymore.
She says their friendship is on life support and Dr. Tom advises that she goes back and resuscitates it. Suddenly, Erica spins around and finds herself back in 1995. She is in the lounge of her house where Judith is raging at her and describing her as juvenile.
Realising where she is, Erica calms Judith down and insists she's not doing Feminist Frosh Week anymore and will be staying with her. Just then, they hear a baby crying and both look down to where Max is lying on the floor.
Shocked, Erica picks him up and Judith comments if the baby is some kind of Frosh Week hazing joke that she's not laughing. Erica insists she isn't joking and Judith wonders why she is babysitting as Erica introduces her to Max.
Jude accuses Erica of bailing on doing Frosh Week with her but says it's no problem when one of Erica's "girl buddies" needs help. Erica assures Judith she's there for her and isn't bailing. She asks Judith to hold Max while she goes and freshens up, joking they look cute together. Judith reminds Erica she can't stand babies and asks Max where his mother is.
Later, Erica is holding Max as Judith tries to organise a car wash. She instructs Erica where to help out, but Erica wonders whether, seeing as Max is cranky, she can just stick to supervising. Judith reminds her that she said she'd be there for her.
Erica puts a t-shirt down on the grass and lays Max don it as she picks up a hose. However, she soon has to pick up him again as he cries and cradles him as she tries to think of a song to soothe him.
At the same time, a guy and a girl taking part in the car wash get into a water fight and the guy throws a sponge which narrowly misses Erica and Max. She turns around and berates him, but Judith reminds her that she has brought a baby to a car wash.
Judith then notices that Max is smelling and needs his diaper changing and Erica asks Judith for two minutes to do so. After finishing changing him, she goes to throw away the used diaper but misses the garbage and it ends up landing on a car hood.
This angers the car's owner who Erica apologises to, and Judith apologises for Erica before telling her and Max to go and disposing of the diaper herself.
Erica heads to get some baby supplies for Max, and pushes him out of the store in the shopping cart. However, she is then apprehended by Dr. Tom, dressed as a policeman, who informs her that stealing a cart is against the law.
She is unhappy at him, and replies that she's borrowing it and brands him unbelievable and a disgrace to his uniform. Dr. Tom picks up some of the diapers Erica has bought, and suggests that such a small body has a lot of needs.
Erica reminds him she came back to show Judith she's not a flake and instead she is a baby-toting flake, which she argues is much worse. Erica says she wants Max back where he belongs and insists she can't do what she came back for.
Dr. Tom agrees with her, but tells her she can do what he brought her back for. Erica asks him what that is and he replies, "Diaper backwards spells 'repaid.' Think about it," before walking off to leave Erica wondering.
Back at her house, Erica is asleep on the couch with Max - being watched by Michael and Judith. He suggests that she has to move out, but Ethan comes in and reminds him that Erica only has Max for a few days. However, Michael complains that, with the smell the baby makes, he can't bring girls home.
Erica then wakes up, surprised to see she has an audience watching her. Judith tells her to go back to sleep and says she will do 'pub night' herself, lamenting that she only has to hand out six carton of condoms all by herself. Erica says she promised herself she wouldn't cancel and insists she and Max will come with Judith.
Judith suggests that Erica leaves Max at home in bed though, wondering whether Ethan wouldn't mind looking after him. However, Ethan replies that he's not comfortable looking after someone else's baby and Michael then drags him away to go to a party.
Erica assures Judith that everything will be fine and they'll have a good time at the pub with Max asleep on her shoulder.
At the pub, Erica, holding Max, introduces the next event of the evening which she tells everyone is the "Best Ass." A crying Max keeps diverting her attention though - which makes some of the audience restless and Erica assures them he's just tired.
One of the contestants in the competition then suggests he needs to be in bed and Erica, angered, recommends that someone in the "Best Ass" contest shouldn't be passing judgement. Judith pulls Erica to one side and asks what she's doing and Erica explains that Max is teething and tired and she thinks she needs to take him back home to bed.
Annoyed, Judith reminds Erica it was her idea for them to be Frosh leaders and she only did it for Erica. She continues, saying she did the car wash and reiterates her belief that looking after Max is stupid.
Erica wonders whether Judith thinks she should have just left Max at home and reminds her when Judith suggests getting a babysitter that that's exactly what she is. Judith tells Erica to take Max back to his mother, giving her some condoms to take to her as well.
She accuses Erica of flaking out on her and doesn't believe her when she insists that that's not the case. Irritated, Erica tells Judith she has a baby that needs to go to bed and her yelling is not making the situation any better or helping. Judith, frustrated, tells Erica to go and that she'll be fine by herself.
Back home, Erica tries in vain to get Max to stop crying while Judith struggles to maintain control teenagers being sick. Eventually the police turn up to the pub and Erica takes to using a blow dryer to try and quieten Max down.
Michael comes into the room and unplugs the blow dryer, and suggests to Erica that he is going to pass out from the heat. She points to it stopping Max from crying, but he rants at her saying Ethan had said she was an awesome roommate but now he doesn't want to live with chicks because their lives are too complicated.
Erica points the blow dryer at him, telling Michael to stop yelling, but he suggests she should go and live someplace else. Ethan then comes in and tells Michael to back off, but Michael storms off saying that either Max leaves tomorrow or he will go.
Struggling not to cry, Erica thanks Ethan for being there and tries to offload Max onto him. However, he informs her he's too loaded and can barely stand so can't take care of Max.
Come the morning, Erica is outside in the front yard, not having got any sleep, bouncing Max up and down while making noises. Judith them comes storming back from the pub and yells at Erica, asking if she has any idea what's she been doing all night.
Erica tries to quieten Judith down as she keeps up her bouncing routine with Max. Judith sees what a bad state she is in and wonders if Max is OK. Erica illustrates to her that if she stops her routine then Max cries. Judith tells her she can't go on and that she is calling her a cab.
In the cab, Erica, holding Max, sits next to Judith in the back and asks where they are going. Judith tells her they are going to see Barbara, as she will know what to do.
Erica then recalls that at Frosh Week the previous year they had had so much fun, reminding Judith how they were chased by the cops after driving into a fountain. Judith wonders how within a year Erica could have dumped her for her feminist friends, which Erica denies.
Judith insists it is the case, calling it Erica's "speciality." She tells Erica she just wishes she could understand why Max and his mother are more important to Erica than her, and says she doesn't even know who Erica is anymore. Erica replies that she's still the same person, but just trying to deal with her situation.
Max begins to cry and Judith, once more, says he needs to home. Erica tells her that what she needs is some patience and support, causing Judith to question why everyone acts like taking care of children is the hardest thing ever. Erica chuckles at this comment.
She tells Judith she has no idea what she is talking about and to wait until she has a baby. Judith exclaims that there's fat chance of that happening and Erica smiles knowingly to herself.
At Erica's parents', Barbara is in the kitchen talking to Sam, who explains her friend Stephanie has told her that she doesn't have to wear her hair as Josh prefers. Barbara reminds her that Stephanie isn't Josh's girlfriend and that, when you love someone, it's nice to make them happy.
She then sees Erica and Judith enter with Max, and Barbara, puzzled, asks Erica what she's doing with a baby. Erica explains that she's babysitting and Judith comments that she needs help and some experienced hands. Barbara replies that she has a set and takes Max from Erica.
Soon afterwards, Max is lying in a crib, watched by Erica and Judith. Barbara enters with a pacifier she has taken from a Baby Shower gift she has bought for some friends and sterilised. She puts it in Max's mouth, pronouncing that the sleeping can now begin.
Erica tells her that Max's mother really doesn't want her using a pacifier, but Barbara tells Erica she was hooked on them and turned out OK. She informs Erica she liked her sleep, and Erica admits she does too. Barbara then leaves to go to work, instructing Erica to call Max's mom.
Her and Judith then quietly back out of the room and close the door. Max begins to cry and Judith offers to go back to him, but Erica tells her he's learning to self soothe. They make their way into the kitchen, where Erica thanks Judith for making her come and see her mom, and Judith questions who would leave a crazy girl having a meltdown with a baby.
They then hear that Max has stopped crying, and Erica suggests all he needed was a few minutes to cool down, with Judith adding a pacifier too - to Erica's surprise.
Judith remarks to Erica that they are spending their first time alone together since last spring, which Erica struggles to believe. She says they used to spend days together at high school and Erica replies that ten years from now they'll still be hanging out and laughing about this experience.
She suggests Erica can't possibly know this, wondering what would happen if Erica hits 30 and is a famous author and they don't have anything in common anymore. Erica replies that it won't happen and tells Judith she is one of the most important people in the world to her and that she is her best friend. They nudge one another and laugh.
Later, Erica is sitting alone drinking coffee in the kitchen when she hears a knock at the door. She answers it to find Dr. Tom, who instantly comments on how quiet the house is and Erica explains how Judith is crashed out on the couch and how Max is sleeping too.
She takes him to see Max, joking that she will be buying her mom the biggest mother's day gift ever. Dr. Tom suggests looking after a baby is not as easy at it looks and Erica agrees that the amount of havoc a little person can cause is unreal.
Erica admits that she had no idea and he reminds her that Judith didn't either, added to the fact she had to give birth. They both lean on the crib and Erica says that for Judith to have her life changed so radically must have been bewildering.
She reflects that everything her friend was good at - ligation, case law, and lunching with clients has been replaced with chaos, albeit beautiful chaos.
Dr. Tom then asks her what she needed the most when a baby had been attached to her every moment and Erica replies that she needed people to give her time and to give her and Max room to figure things out.
"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one,'" he tells her and Erica smiles before suddenly finds herself transported back to the present day - sitting next to Max while he lies in the crib in his room.
She then hears Judith and Anthony returning and rushes down the stairs to meet them. She immediately apologises to Judith, saying she was right and that Max's sleeping schedule matters a lot. Judith thanks her and Erica admits that she didn't try hard enough to understand where she was coming from.
Judith concedes that it's really hard if you haven't been there when babies get overtired and Erica recounts tales from a 'friend' about deep knee bends and blow dryers and the crazy lengths she went to get her baby to bed.
Hearing no sound from upstairs, Judith wonders whether he is sleeping and she and Erica head upstairs into his room. Judith explains to Erica how she misses Max whenever she is away and then goes up to his crib to see him sleeping.
She is shocked to see that he has a pacifier in his mouth though, but Erica argues that he's sleeping and Judith herself said he needed to. She fails to see the harm of one pacifier. However, Judith is angry, suggesting that to put Max to bed at 7pm and not use a pacifier were not hard rules for Erica to follow.
Judith remarks that the night has been like their friendship on repeat for years but Erica, annoyed, retorts that for years she has been the screw-up while Judith is perfect. She says people change and she's not the same person she was, and nor is Judith.
Erica insists she's not a screw up and that Judith is most definitely not perfect before storming out and leaving Judith to digest her words.
Making her way home, Erica gets out of a cab onto the sidewalk where she is greeted by Dr. Tom, asking her to sit down next to him on a bench. She bemoans that Kai was right, suggesting that once friends have kids you're on your way to friend divorce.
Dr. Tom says this would be a shame, considering her and Judith share a lot of history but Erica replies that she has tried to see where she is coming from and understand her point of view, but it hasn't been enough.
He suggests that the problem with friendships is that they are a two-way street and Erica wonders what more she can do. Dr. Tom tells her she can wait and, as Erica asks what for, her cell phone begins to ring. He motions with his eyes that this is what she is waiting for.
Erica answers the phone to Judith, who asks if they can meet up at Goblins in 20 minutes, which Erica agrees to. Dr. Tom sits silently, smiling, and Erica gets up and leaves him sitting alone.
Meanwhile, Sam is leaving Barbara's but, as she heads for the door, Barbara asks her to wait and tells her she has been where is. Sam, confused, wonders if she means standing in the foyer with lasagne, but Barbara explains that she lived her father's life, then lived for her kids, but never for herself.
Sam asks what she is talking about, and Barbara questions whether she really wants to move to London. Sam reiterates that it's a great opportunity, although Barbara suggests it only is for Josh. Sam doesn't know what to say, and Barbara tells her that she knows what she is doing and it is a mistake.
Hurt, Sam insists she needs to go and leaves. As she closes the door, Barbara leans up against it and Sam, after getting into her car, begins to break down and cry.
At Goblins, Erica is sitting at a table when Judith arrives. She joins her and explains that, after Erica left, she started thinking about what she had said and how she had acted herself.
Judith states that she doesn't know what's wrong with her, but Erica reminds her that she has a four month old, is tired and anxious, and must be on an insane learning curve. Judith sighs, and admits it's harder than law school.
Erica stresses she is trying to be supportive, but misses Judith, who reciprocates Erica's feelings. She tells Judith that every day there are so many things she wants to tell her, and Judith assures her she wants to hear them, before admitting that she got distracted earlier and is trying to figure out how to pay attention to a million things at once.
She sighs once more, and picks up the conversation about Ethan from the afternoon and Erica explains how, although she is confused and trying to figure things out, she is happy and he is great.
Judith asks about work, and Erica informs her that Julianne and Friedkin are sleeping together before revealing that she has been awarded the biggest title of the year, which Judith is thrilled to hear. She tells Erica that things have really changed and Erica agrees it has for both of them.
She then asks Erica if she can be brutally honest, which Erica tells her she expects nothing less, and Judith confesses that she doesn't feel as if she's really good at being a mother and isn't used to feeling like she sucks at something.
Judith explains how she misses being at work, despite everyone telling her how she should enjoy maternity leave. She admits that Alison, Marie, and Anthony don't know how she feels and tells Erica that she feels as though she is the only person she can tell.
Erica then wonders if Judith remembers the crazy sex dreams she used to have about Professor Lozar and admits to Judith that she still has them sometimes. They both laugh and Erica says she never tells anyone and can't talk to Ethan about it.
She says she has told Judith because they can tell one another everything. Judith agrees, and tells Erica she is going to try harder and make time for her - although Erica understands that sometimes things can get crazy sometimes.
Erica assures Judith she won't get resentful or angry when she can't be there or has to cancel and the wine she has ordered for them is then brought to them by a waiter. They continue to chat and laugh as Erica narrates.
"When life pulls you apart you have to work to stay closer together. By putting yourself in each other's shoes, by reminding each other of who you are, who you were, and who you are becoming.
"By remembering that, despite all the changes that come, there is some things that will always remain the same."
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Battle Royale: Analysis
Season 2, Episode 2: Battle Royale
Analysis
"It's good to talk." Growing up this side of the Atlantic during the '90s, you used to hear that phrase a lot when British Telecom used it on a string of TV commercials.
However, the older I've got, the more I've realised that people don't put it into practice. All in all, human beings are dreadful communicators.
Instead, we avoid talking about things, we don't express our emotions, share our feelings, or confide in people. I guess it's the easier option. After all, talking about something difficult is the first step to confronting and, hopefully, resolving it.
If we never talk though, we just allow problems to get worse, things to escalate, and minor issues become major ones - and they can very quickly spell the end of our relationships.
It's the lesson Erica learns in Episode 2 that, while having finally bagged the guy she's been in love with forever, her dream relationship could very quickly implode if they aren't able to communicate with one another properly.
In a weird kind of way, it's another example of the transition between being friends and being in a relationship. While you're never closer to a friend than you are a partner, it can often be easier to discuss certain things with friends than your other half - which isn't how it should be.
Entering into a relationship completely alters the dynamic between two people too, where you go from being a person in someone's life to being the person in someone's life. Where secrets and lies are no longer allowed, and where you're introduced to a new concept - arguing with one another.
Of course, for Erica, everything blows up at Sam's 30th birthday celebrations. Now, I am a guy, so maybe it's typical that I'd side with Ethan, but I do think Erica went well over the top in her reaction to him.
Sure, he was probably wrong to go out for so long. However, all the talk about marriage between Erica and Aunt Roberta? I mean, she knows Ethan better than anyone, does she really think, despite them being such close friends for so long, that the guy wants to get re-married again so quickly?
There's nothing worse, too, than a couple's argument brewing and simmering in a public place when it really needs to be properly tended to. It always ends up impacting on others who, unless they're blind, clearly notice everything isn't right.
I guess we always fall back on the "not discussing this now" line when actually these things need to be confronted before it gets worse. However, when it's too late to save public face, I say just get it over and done with.
Certainly that was my own experience of relationships. Now, I'm not a big talker, I keep myself to myself and don't reveal my deepest thoughts or emotions, but when I know there's a problem then I try to talk about it.
However, if the other person isn't willing to play ball, then things can often just end up getting worse. How many of the silly things we argue and fight about could just be solved if we talked properly and openly though?
I mean, sure we all avoid confrontation. Indeed, outside family or a relationship, I don't think I've ever had a falling out with a pal. I'm just not like that. The fights ubiquitous to a relationship almost put me off them altogether though.
As for Erica, one relationship with a man - and I'll come on the others of Erica's in this episode later - which has been put back together is that of hers with Dr. Tom.
There's a nice moment when she sits down in his office and smiles at him, saying how pleased she is to be back there doing her therapy and talking about things with him. He smiles at this too. Erica and Dr. Tom - one of TV's best double acts.
He is in fine devil's advocate mood throughout this episode actually. It's a position I often try to adopt myself, because I do think it's a necessary evil and someone has to do it. Sometimes you have to say difficult or awkward things and not just stick to opting for the easy option.
Dr. Tom does it brilliantly - challenging Erica's communication skills both in terms of how much she communicates and the way in which she does it. Seriously girls, when will you realise shouting and nagging a guy doesn't work? We don't respond to it.
I have to be honest and say that the time travelling in this episode is actually one of my least favourite during the first two seasons. Having thought about it, I think it may be because of the lack of regular characters - just Erica, Jenny, as well as Dr. Tom of course, who appear.
It's always more fun when other characters from her family or circle of friends are included in the regrets. I guess for it to have worked though, it had to be someone she'd met at a camp like that and then totally lost contact with without ever discovering why things went wrong.
I think as the episode goes on it's quite obvious to guess what is up with Malcolm, so it's not that much of a surprise when he reveals to Erica the real reason behind his behaviour.
As ever though, Being Erica teaches us the lesson that having regrets is one thing, we just have to learn not to repeat the same mistakes in the present day that led to our regrets in the first place.
In Erica's case, that's actually opening up and talking honestly with Ethan - in a really powerful scene between the two.
As for her other relationships. Brent is clearly still fuming about being overlooked for "the sex book." He's obviously unhappy that Erica has been chosen ahead of him, although it's hardly her fault, and he evidently isn't sure how to act around her.
His anger, instead, is reserved for Julianne. Poor woman. Completely oblivious to the havoc Brent is about to unleash with his email to Galvin. Hell hath no fury like a metrosexual scorned.
Brent's actions are clearly motivated out of revenge, although we all know he has a point about Julianne's judgement and managerial style. I wonder if his ends ultimately justify his means though? I guess that's a point for a future date.
However, it accurately portrays how Brent described himself to Friedkin in his management class, "decisive" and "potent" indeed. Add in "conniving" and "ruthless" too.
Finally, after the dramatic revelation at the end of the last episode, Erica begins her struggle in trying to get Kai to open up about his therapy. He's clearly resistant at first, but it adds an interesting dimension to her own therapy - as well as her relationship with Ethan.
Is it any coincidence, too, that both of the first two episodes end in the same way - with Erica and Kai at Goblins? As with so many of Erica's experiences in Season 2 - they end up coming back to Kai.
Analysis
"It's good to talk." Growing up this side of the Atlantic during the '90s, you used to hear that phrase a lot when British Telecom used it on a string of TV commercials.
However, the older I've got, the more I've realised that people don't put it into practice. All in all, human beings are dreadful communicators.
Instead, we avoid talking about things, we don't express our emotions, share our feelings, or confide in people. I guess it's the easier option. After all, talking about something difficult is the first step to confronting and, hopefully, resolving it.
If we never talk though, we just allow problems to get worse, things to escalate, and minor issues become major ones - and they can very quickly spell the end of our relationships.
It's the lesson Erica learns in Episode 2 that, while having finally bagged the guy she's been in love with forever, her dream relationship could very quickly implode if they aren't able to communicate with one another properly.
In a weird kind of way, it's another example of the transition between being friends and being in a relationship. While you're never closer to a friend than you are a partner, it can often be easier to discuss certain things with friends than your other half - which isn't how it should be.
Entering into a relationship completely alters the dynamic between two people too, where you go from being a person in someone's life to being the person in someone's life. Where secrets and lies are no longer allowed, and where you're introduced to a new concept - arguing with one another.
Of course, for Erica, everything blows up at Sam's 30th birthday celebrations. Now, I am a guy, so maybe it's typical that I'd side with Ethan, but I do think Erica went well over the top in her reaction to him.
Sure, he was probably wrong to go out for so long. However, all the talk about marriage between Erica and Aunt Roberta? I mean, she knows Ethan better than anyone, does she really think, despite them being such close friends for so long, that the guy wants to get re-married again so quickly?
There's nothing worse, too, than a couple's argument brewing and simmering in a public place when it really needs to be properly tended to. It always ends up impacting on others who, unless they're blind, clearly notice everything isn't right.
I guess we always fall back on the "not discussing this now" line when actually these things need to be confronted before it gets worse. However, when it's too late to save public face, I say just get it over and done with.
Certainly that was my own experience of relationships. Now, I'm not a big talker, I keep myself to myself and don't reveal my deepest thoughts or emotions, but when I know there's a problem then I try to talk about it.
However, if the other person isn't willing to play ball, then things can often just end up getting worse. How many of the silly things we argue and fight about could just be solved if we talked properly and openly though?
I mean, sure we all avoid confrontation. Indeed, outside family or a relationship, I don't think I've ever had a falling out with a pal. I'm just not like that. The fights ubiquitous to a relationship almost put me off them altogether though.
As for Erica, one relationship with a man - and I'll come on the others of Erica's in this episode later - which has been put back together is that of hers with Dr. Tom.
There's a nice moment when she sits down in his office and smiles at him, saying how pleased she is to be back there doing her therapy and talking about things with him. He smiles at this too. Erica and Dr. Tom - one of TV's best double acts.
He is in fine devil's advocate mood throughout this episode actually. It's a position I often try to adopt myself, because I do think it's a necessary evil and someone has to do it. Sometimes you have to say difficult or awkward things and not just stick to opting for the easy option.
Dr. Tom does it brilliantly - challenging Erica's communication skills both in terms of how much she communicates and the way in which she does it. Seriously girls, when will you realise shouting and nagging a guy doesn't work? We don't respond to it.
I have to be honest and say that the time travelling in this episode is actually one of my least favourite during the first two seasons. Having thought about it, I think it may be because of the lack of regular characters - just Erica, Jenny, as well as Dr. Tom of course, who appear.
It's always more fun when other characters from her family or circle of friends are included in the regrets. I guess for it to have worked though, it had to be someone she'd met at a camp like that and then totally lost contact with without ever discovering why things went wrong.
I think as the episode goes on it's quite obvious to guess what is up with Malcolm, so it's not that much of a surprise when he reveals to Erica the real reason behind his behaviour.
As ever though, Being Erica teaches us the lesson that having regrets is one thing, we just have to learn not to repeat the same mistakes in the present day that led to our regrets in the first place.
In Erica's case, that's actually opening up and talking honestly with Ethan - in a really powerful scene between the two.
As for her other relationships. Brent is clearly still fuming about being overlooked for "the sex book." He's obviously unhappy that Erica has been chosen ahead of him, although it's hardly her fault, and he evidently isn't sure how to act around her.
His anger, instead, is reserved for Julianne. Poor woman. Completely oblivious to the havoc Brent is about to unleash with his email to Galvin. Hell hath no fury like a metrosexual scorned.
Brent's actions are clearly motivated out of revenge, although we all know he has a point about Julianne's judgement and managerial style. I wonder if his ends ultimately justify his means though? I guess that's a point for a future date.
However, it accurately portrays how Brent described himself to Friedkin in his management class, "decisive" and "potent" indeed. Add in "conniving" and "ruthless" too.
Finally, after the dramatic revelation at the end of the last episode, Erica begins her struggle in trying to get Kai to open up about his therapy. He's clearly resistant at first, but it adds an interesting dimension to her own therapy - as well as her relationship with Ethan.
Is it any coincidence, too, that both of the first two episodes end in the same way - with Erica and Kai at Goblins? As with so many of Erica's experiences in Season 2 - they end up coming back to Kai.
Battle Royale
Season 2, Episode 2: Battle Royale
Episode Guide
In Erica's bedroom, her and Ethan are debating something, while she narrates.
"Fighting. It's like eating, sleeping, breathing. We all do it, just in our own way. Some say that the success of a relationship depends on how we resolve conflict. Like it or not, how we fight matters."
We then see Erica and Ethan wrestling one another on the bed. She manages to get on top of him and pin him down, she then proceeds to lick his eyeball - despite him pleading with her not to.
Ethan then flips her over so that he is now on top of Erica and, despite her begging him not to, gets his own back by tickling her. Erica laughs and they end up making out. She then begins to undo his belt buckle and tells Ethan to get a condom.
Much to her disappointment, he informs her that they used the last one in the morning. Ethan then says that it's nearly midnight and he needs to get up early tomorrow anyway and apologises. He gets off Erica and sits on the edge of the bed.
Erica laments that he always has to get up early, but then suddenly springs off the bed, excited, and heads for her chest of drawers, telling Ethan she has got something for him.
She describes how he always has to rush home to shower and shave after spending the night at hers and, presenting him with a toiletry kit, says he now won't have to. Sitting on his lap, she then recommends that he keeps some clothes in her closet, swearing, despite appearing not, it does have space in it.
Ethan comments that it sounds like he's moving in, and Erica says it doesn't make sense for him to be paying rent next door when he's spending every night at hers. Ethan doesn't look convinced, and admits that it doesn't make sense that he never sleeps at home and suggests he should some time.
Thinking he's joking, Erica laughs at this idea until she realises Ethan is being serious. He tells her it's not that he doesn't enjoy sleeping at hers, but Erica gets off his lap and goes to lie down, upset, and says he doesn't need to explain himself.
She tells him she won't stop him sleeping at his own place and if he wants he should, suggesting he starts tonight. Ethan questions why she's making such a big thing out of it, and Erica apologises, admitting she's tired and being dumb. She insists she's totally fine and Ethan heads for the shower as Erica lies down and thinks.
"Conflict and relationships. They go hand in hand. Too bad then that most of us will do almost anything to avoid confrontation."
The next morning, Erica is awoken by her alarm clock. She glances over to her beside table, seeing Ethan's toiletry kit, which makes her slump back down in her bed.
Walking through the city on her way to work, Erica calls Ethan on her cell phone and asks him where he was in the morning. He tells her he had to go to the bank and is now running late and asks whether he can call her later.
Erica reminds him that it's Sam's birthday party in the evening, and Ethan sighs - having clearly forgotten. She checks whether he's made other plans, and he admits he had arranged to go for drinks with his friend Michael, but will cancel them.
He asks her what time she wants to meet him at her mom's. Erica is surprised at this question, thinking they would be going together, but tells him 7pm. Ethan says he'll see her then and hangs up, leaving Erica puzzled that he didn't even have time to say goodbye.
Erica then heads into Goblins where the young barista she thinks she saw going in for time-travelling therapy is working. She makes herself known and orders a latte. She says they haven't officially met yet, and introduces herself.
He shakes her hand and tells her his name is Kai, which she comments is a cool name. Erica then suggests that he doesn't remember her, describing herself as the "vanilla syrup girl," and reminding him of how he'd gone to the supply closet to get some for her seeing as they were out.
Kai doesn't answer, and Erica continues, telling him she was wondering what he had been doing in there, before admitting that she thinks she knows what he was doing because she does it too. Again, Kai doesn't respond, but simply hands Erica her latte.
Erica persists and asks him if he's ever been in therapy. He stares at her but doesn't reply, instead serving another customer and Erica decides to leave, with a freaked out Kai watching her as she does.
At River Rock, Erica and Meeri are working together as Brent walks past and exchanges an awkward hello. Erica feels sorry for him and Meeri comments that he is in a serious funk. She jokes that she will have a wager with Erica that he either quits or will be fired.
Erica is unhappy to hear this and suggests he just needs a little time because he really wanted to edit "the sex book." As this goes on, Brent, in the coffee lounge, is invited by Julianne to talk in her office.
This reminds Meeri that Julianne wants Erica to meet with some high profile authors for drinks in the evening, and suggests that night. Erica tells her she can't, explaining she and Ethan are going to her sister's 30th birthday celebration.
Meeri declares Ethan going as her date as "righteous" and Erica agrees, adding it's the first real family thing he will be attending as her boyfriend.
In Julianne's office, Brent sits down to talk with her and she asks him what the "dealio" is. He pretends not to understand what she's talking about, but she says they're adults and should be able to have a frank discussion before accusing him of being upset over "the sex book."
Brent insists he's fine, and Julianne assures him he's a good editor but says his last book was late and lacklustre. She advises him to step up his game and get back on top and Brent, eventually, replies that he will do his best to and apologises for disappointing her before leaving.
That evening, Sam's party is well underway as Erica waits by the front door waiting for Ethan to arrive. She looks at her watch and then checks her cell phone for any missed calls or messages from him.
She greets her dad, and Gary asks where Ethan is. Erica replies that she doesn't know and that he was supposed to be there. Just then Ethan arrives and Erica asks what took him so long. He apologises, explaining that traffic was terrible. She takes him by the hand to meet people.
Sitting down on the couch, Erica and Ethan are with Aunt Roberta, who is telling them how perfect she thought it was when she heard about the two of them from Barbara. Hearing her name, Erica's mom then comes over and tells Roberta she better not be talking about marriage.
The idea planted in her head, Roberta then informs Erica that she is planning on taking a cruise to Alaska in the summer and says she doesn't want to miss anything. Erica jokes that she will be sure to give her plenty of notice - a comment which makes Ethan perturbed.
Elsewhere, Josh is helping himself to some food when some kids running around bump into him, causing him to spill some egg onto his shoe, and he shouts at them. Sam tells him to get used to it, saying in a couple of years time it will be their little ones running around.
Josh suggests if they act like that they'll be kept on a leash, and Sam begins to talk about how they will look and her intention to take a couple of years off work, how her mom will be able to babysit whenever they need to, and how they need to buy a bigger house with a nice back yard - none of which seems to be enthusing Josh.
They turn their attentions to Erica and Ethan sitting on the couch, where Erica wipes something off Ethan's face, prompting Josh to make a "whipped" sound, which Sam tells him to stop.
Roberta is telling Erica about a couple she knows who are now getting divorced because they disagree about having kids. Ethan listens, overwhelmed, and when Roberta advises Erica to discuss such a thing before getting married, he begins to choke on his food.
He tells Erica something went down the wrong way and excuses himself. They watch him go, with Roberta and Barbara commenting on how darling and handsome Ethan is, and Erica concurs.
Instead of heading to the bathroom though, Ethan goes outside to his car, where he gets inside and turns on some music - looking to chill out.
A while later, Erica knocks on the bathroom door, checking whether Ethan is in there, but finds it empty. She walks down the stairs and finds Ethan, and asks him where he has been as he had gone to the bathroom half an hour ago.
Ethan tells her he needed some air and Barbara then comes up to them, ushering them to where they are going to take a picture of the family and she shouts for everyone to gather.
Erica, confused by Ethan's behaviour, questions why he left without telling her and he replies that he didn't think he had to tell her every time he left the room. She is shocked by his flippant attitude, but she doesn't have time to respond as Barbara begins arranging people for the photo.
She goes over to the camera and Ethan suggests that she should be in the photo and he will take it instead. Barbara tells him it's on a timer, but Erica says Ethan should take it if he doesn't want to be in the picture, and wonders whether he just needs some air.
Ethan tells her he didn't realise it was on a timer and was just trying to help out. Noticing this, Josh then jokes that if Ethan thinks dating a Strange is tough, he should try marrying one, which displeases Sam and Erica appears stony faced.
Barbara sets the camera and the picture is taken and directly afterwards Erica asks to speak with Ethan. Once alone, she rages at him - asking what his problem is. Ethan denies he has one and asks why Erica has to make a big deal out of everything.
She can't believe him, pointing to him sulking through every conversation, going missing for half an hour, and then bailing on a simple picture. Erica wonders whether being her boyfriend is a burden on him, but he tells her she's being ridiculous.
Erica then questions whether he wants to be in their relationship, because he's not acting like it. Shocked at this accusation, Ethan walks out of the door and leaves, and Erica, annoyed, heads for the French Windows to go outside and get some air herself.
However, instead she finds herself walking into Dr. Tom's office where she immediately appeals for his help and asks him to tell her why Ethan is being a "passive aggressive, insensitive, game-playing..."
Before she can finish her description though, he interjects, telling her: "The course of true love never did run smooth." She looks around to where he stands, behind her chair, reading a book, and smiles at him.
This intrigues Dr. Tom, but Erica explains that she's pleased to be back there with him, and he smiles back. He goes to sit down on his chair, and returns to the topic of Ethan. She bemoans that, every time he doesn't like something, he runs away.
Erica begins to suggest it's impossible to communicate with him, but Dr. Tom interjects and wonders whether Erica really was trying to "communicate" with Ethan. She believes it was obvious she was.
Unconvinced, Dr. Tom begins to flip through her list before selecting the one he wants, asking her about, "Malcolm Abrams, Camp Wakini." Erica is surprised to hear his name, commenting that she hasn't seen him in years.
She explains that he was her best friend until she turned into Satan, adding that that sounds familiar. Erica tells Dr. Tom that her and Malcolm met at Camp Wakini as kids and that they would spend hours talking with one another on the docks.
Erica says senior year had started great, when Malcolm smuggled in some weed. She teased him as he was not the type, but they they go into the woods and get high off it and laugh until their stomachs hurt. She says it didn't take long until their relationship became romantic - then it all fell apart.
Dr. Tom asks how, but she admits she doesn't really know. Erica recalls how she thought it was going really well until he dumped her out of the blue with no explanation before hooking up the next day with a 14-year-old, Rachel Zimmerman.
She says Malcolm changed overnight and wouldn't even talk to her so, to get back at him, she called him a cradle robber, painting a flag reading 'Malcolm Jail Bait Abrams.' Dr. Tom suggests this was creative, and Erica admits she was pretty pleased with herself until Malcom framed her.
Erica explains that Malcolm had planted his disc man, boxer shorts, and a lock of his hair in her stuff and then told everyone that he'd been robbed and it must be the work of a stalker. When her cabin had been searched they had found his stuff and Erica had been sent home, labelled a thief, and wasn't asked back as staff.
She says it bothers her today that Malcolm could just turn on her like he did, and how he could go overnight from her best friend to her worst enemy. Dr. Tom asks what will she do this time and she says she'd rather ignore him.
Erica admits she provoked him with her flag and it got her kicked out, and it wasn't worth it. She says if she could re-write her history she would just enjoy the summer, hang out with her friends, and pretend that Malcolm Abrams didn't exist.
Suddenly, Erica finds herself transported back to the camp, where she is sitting with Jenny, painting the flag about Malcolm. Realising what's going on, she suddenly tips over a tin of black paint over the flag, pretending to Jenny that it was an accident.
They head into a cabin where some other girls are practising for their air band routine. Jenny laments that she wasted an hour painting the flag. One of the girls, Sari, asks if they got caught and Jenny, referring to Erica, informs Sari that "split personality girl" chickened out.
Erica insists that isn't the case, and she has just changed her mind. She tells them that getting into a public war with Malcolm isn't a good idea and she would rather just ignore him. Jenny wonders whether Erica knows what he is saying about her, and Sari tells her Malcolm is calling her crazy and a stalker.
She continues, saying Malcolm described how Erica cried when he dumped her and that she had threatened to kill herself. Erica refutes this and Jenny says Malcolm is ruining her reputation and needs a taste of his own medicine.
Sari reminds Erica that she was dumped for Rachel Zimmerman who she describes as a "baby." She then comes up with the idea of stuffing Malcolm's bed with diapers, which Jenny loves.
However, Erica reiterates they will be ignoring Malcolm as he is not worth it and she doesn't care what he says or does. She insists that they don't retaliate and that, as he is her ex, she gets to decide.
Later, by the lake, Erica, Jenny, and Sari are lying on the sand, relaxing, as Malcolm hangs out nearby with some of his friends. Rachel then makes her way towards them, with Erica surprised by just how young she looks, as well as appearing scared.
Jenny suggests that Erica goes over and makes her cry, but Erica instead gets up and says she wants to tell Rachel she has no hard feelings. Erica approaches Rachel and begins to talk but, seeing this, Malcolm comes running over.
He demands to know what Erica has been saying, and Jenny comes over and enquires as to what his "damage" is. Malcolm's friend, Gibby, says he is acting psycho but Malcolm suggests Erica is trying to "talk shit" about him. Jenny claims that is what he's doing.
Keen to avoid any confrontation though, Erica leads Jenny and Sari away, asking them to consider what the Buddha would do. Jenny doesn't find this amusing, but Erica says she's just trying to avoid war.
They are interrupted by the camp supervisor coming over and telling them that air band will be beginning in 15 minutes. Malcolm and Rachel share a kiss, before Gibby asks Malcolm what he is doing. Malcolm replies that Erica is obsessed with him and is crazy. Gibby makes light of these suggestions, and they get into an argument.
Erica's air band is getting ready to perform in front of the watching audience. Clearly rusty, she struggles to keep up with everyone else, having to improvise and wing her way through it. However, the audience clap them off at the end.
As they come off stage, with Erica apologising for her performance and admitting she deserves to just be on tape duty, she discovers Malcolm waiting to talk to her backstage. He says that the summer is too short to be fighting with her and suggest a truce, which Erica accepts.
He then heads on stage to take part in the boy's air band routine, and checks Erica will be sticking around to watch. She tells him she will but, suspicious of his behaviour, informs Jenny she has to leave and check on something.
Erica heads back to her cabin and finds that Malcolm has once again hidden his stuff under her belongings. She can't believe this and, having placed them in a bag, she heads off fuming. However, her walk through the woods is interrupted as Dr. Tom, pruning trees, calls out to her.
He suggests it's a beautiful day for air band before noticing Erica doesn't look happy. She exclaims that Malcolm once again hid his stuff - describing how he called a truce only to stab her in the back. Dr. Tom suggests this is strange and wonders why Malcolm did it.
Erica follows him around as he continues to prune trees and suggests Malcolm is crazy. She says that Jenny and Sari were right and that she has been doing things wrong. She compares Malcolm to an animal who has sensed her weakness and then gone for the jugular.
She concludes that she needs to fight back and Dr. Tom responds that, "Returning violence with violence only multiplies violence." Erica disagrees, saying there is a flaw in that theory.
He asks her to enlighten him, and she tells him that the cycle of violence continues only until someone wins. Erica says she didn't get kicked out last time because she fought back, but because she didn't go far enough. She declares that she lost, but this time she will win when she stays and Malcolm goes.
Dr. Tom infers that winning is Erica's solution, and she argues that it is because she's done everything else and asks him to tell her if there's another option, as she doesn't see it. Erica says that Malcolm will not stop until she is kicked out, which Dr. Tom chuckles at.
She begins to walk away from him, telling Dr. Tom he can throw all the riddles he wants at her, but she is getting to the point where she doesn't care. Erica says one of her and Malcolm has to go and this time it's not going to be her. She walks away, proclaiming that Malcolm is going down.
Later on, Erica is down by the lake, watching on as Malcolm jokes about with some other girls. Gibby then comes up to Erica, checking who she is sharing a tent with and informing her he'll be sharing with Malcolm.
He tells Erica that ever since Malcolm broke up with her he's been weird, and that he has added being mean to his usual paranoid self. He wonders what happened to Malcolm. Just then, Malcolm shouts over to Gibby, asking him if he's going to get going or if he will be spending all his time drooling over Erica.
Then, the camp supervisor comes over, instructing the girls around Malcolm to get their canoes ready before asking to speak to Malcolm for a second. Seeing this, Erica smiles, knowingly, to herself.
The supervisor tells Malcolm she has received an anonymous note informing her that he has drugs in his cabin. Malcolm is shocked to hear this, and tells her it's not true. She warns him that, if they find anything, he will be on the first bus home. Malcolm turns around and sees Erica smiling at him.
Later, Erica, Jenny, and Sari are in a canoe paddling on the lake. They pass Malcolm, sitting by the lakeside, who asks to talk with Erica alone, and he tells her to bring her pack with her.
Walking through the woods together, Malcolm suggests it was a nice try on Erica's behalf but wonders whether she really thought he'd be stupid enough to keep drugs in his cabin. Erica asks if the whole point of their conversation was so he can rub it in her face.
Malcolm says he think they should stay away from one another, but Erica reminds him that he was the one who called a truce and broke it. She tells him to forget it, as she doesn't trust anything he says.
Erica states he has driven her to the point that she is acting like him. Malcolm can't believe she is claiming to be totally innocent though. However, in their argument, they miss the turning for their destination, Smoke Lake.
Still walking, Erica asks what she did to him and Malcolm sarcastically replies nothing, suggesting Erica is perfect. She says she can't believe she was ever friends with him and he says that that is something they can agree on.
They arrive at the lake, but are surprised to see nobody else there. Malcolm then notices the sign reads Little Joe Lake. Erica comments they are supposed to be at Smoke Lake and Malcolm is angry they have come to the wrong lake.
Erica says they'll just double back and find the right path and they head off. However, after more walking around, they then find themselves at Big Joe Lake. Erica can't believe it, and takes off her pack, as does Malcolm - who sits down on his.
She suggests that if they just wait it out then the others will realise they're lost and send out a tripper to find them. She takes a bag of food from her pack and begins to eat, offering Malcolm some. He doesn't respond though.
Erica then begins to construct the tent, telling him it's getting dark and they may have to spend the night if they're not found. Malcolm says she is building the tent wrong and takes over, suggesting she goes to look for firewood instead. However, he then changes his mind and says she shouldn't go by herself.
They hunt for wood, and Erica wonders if he is worried she is going to whack herself in the face with a branch. Malcolm explains that there are bears in the woods and Erica jokes that he would be able to fight one off her if it attacked. He replies he would if he had too.
Erica suggests this is noble considering he's spent the last week trying to get rid of her. Malcolm concurs, adding though that he doesn't want her killed.
They continue walking, when Erica suddenly stops and asks Malcolm whether he heard a sound. He thinks she is joking, but she tells him to be quiet. He suggests it was just a raccoon but they then hear a bigger noise and Erica rules out it being a raccoon.
Stopping to look around, Erica freaks that it's a bear, but Malcolm isn't convinced. They then hear the animal make a grunting noise and begin to run away quickly. They stop again, holding one another for protection and comfort as they try to spot the animal.
They're relieved to see it is only a deer and relax. Erica says she is an idiot and Malcolm comments that she always reacts like this, reminding her of the bat which Erica remembers breaking the cabin door because of.
The deer eats something from Erica's pack and then leaves. Malcolm also recalls the tree frog which scared Erica and says he would have protected her. She replies that she knows he would, and tells him he always took her seriously, even when she got all crazy.
They return to their spot by the lake and sit down. Erica says she doesn't get how they went from spending every day together to hating each other. They agree that it sucks, and she tells him she's looking at him and thinking that he is the guy who used to be her best friend.
Erica says she really misses that guy and wants to know why it all fell apart. Malcolm bows his head as he listens to this, and she suggests they should talk about it. He jokes that he's so thirsty he can barely form sentences and Erica goes to the lake to fill her flask with water.
Malcolm takes the opportunity to walk back into the woods and, when Erica returns, she finds him anxiously pacing around. As she approaches him, he suddenly pulls her towards him and kisses her. Erica pulls away, shocked, and asks him what he's doing.
He tells her not to talk and suggests they just start over. Malcolm says he wasn't ready but now he is. Erica reminds him about Rachel, but he insists he wants Erica and not her. She is confused, but Malcolm goes to try and kiss her again.
Erica resists and he says he thought it was what she wanted. Erica restates her desire to talk. Malcolm tells her to forget talking and kisses her. She breaks it again and notices that his hands are shaking.
Malcolm then pushes her up against a tree, forcing himself on her as he kisses her. Erica angrily pushes him off, screaming for him to get off. Malcolm is shocked at his own behaviour and Erica can't believe what he is doing.
He tries to explain his actions, and Erica wants to know why one minute he is her friend and the next becoming a monster. Malcolm intimiates that he knows, and she suggests it's like he can't decide whether he likes her or whether she repulses him.
Malcolm is pacing around, and she asks if he has any idea what it's like to feel like you're disgusting. He stops at this comment, as Erica explains that's why she tried to pretend he didn't exist and why she tried to destroy him - because she was so hurt.
Getting emotional, he says there's nothing wrong with her, and that it's him, and he tells her that he's gay. Erica is surprised, and he asks her not to tell anybody. Erica says she would never and Malcolm suggests she must think he is a freak.
Erica replies not at all, telling him she wishes he had told her before, and asking why he didn't. Malcolm can't believe she thinks he would have told her the one thing she could have used to wreck his whole life and Erica concedes the stupidity of her question.
He holds his head in his hands as Erica comments that it all finally makes sense. She says that she can only imagine how hard it was for him to tell her, but assures him that she's the last person who will betray or judge him - pointing out that her Uncle Ruby is gay.
Erica then admits that she kissed a girl once, adding that it was good. She then tells Malcolm that Brandon from his cabin is also gay. He rejects this idea, but she adds that he should give him ten years.
Malcolm states that he can't believe he's talking to Erica about this, but she tells him it's better than not talking about it. She then suggests that he should go for Brandon, as he is "totally hot," before accepting that it may be too much for Malcolm at that moment.
He then spots Gibby in a canoe on the lake and Erica runs to the lake and shouts out to them. Gibby tells them the whole camp is looking for them and Erica apologises. She then holds Malcolm's hand and says they got a little distracted.
When asked if they're back together, she tells them they could say that, and smiles at Malcolm, who smiles back at Erica and says that they're all good. Erica then begins to head to get into the canoe but trips over.
However, she then finds herself tripping over in her backyard back in the present day. She looks up to see Dr. Tom standing over her, and asks him if the trip was really necessary. She gets up off the ground and he comments that it's a beautiful night for a walk.
Erica says she needs to go and talk to Ethan, which Dr. Tom suggests is a novel idea. She exclaims that it's unbelievable that her friendship with Malcolm ended because they never talked about what was going on.
She tells him that the thing that killed her was it's simplicity, and she wonders why she just didn't ask Malcolm what was going on. Dr. Tom replies that it's because talking as a means of resolving conflict goes against every biological instinct that we have.
He explains that when we feel threatened we fight or, if we don't have the stomach for that, we run. Erica suggests this is what Ethan did, and Dr. Tom agrees, stating Ethan ran and that Malcolm attacked.
Erica suggests that Malcolm was different as he had a secret, but Dr. Tom questions whether she thinks he is the only one. She wonders what he means, and Dr. Tom tells her sometimes we fight because we're simply unable to tell the other person how we really feel.
She realises he is referring to her, but insists that she has always been honest with Ethan. Dr. Tom asks her if she's sure about that and that, as long as she's sure, it's good. He then wishes her goodnight, leaving Erica contemplating.
Meanwhile, Sam and Josh are in the car, also making their way home from her party. He tells her he's exhausted and she replies that she isn't tired at all, suggesting that it could be because she's ovulating. Josh smirks, and wonders if this is supposed to turn him on.
Sam replies that she's wondering whether he wants to, but Josh replies that what he wants to do is give Sam her birthday present. He then hands her some plane tickets, which she opens to discover they are for going to London.
She exclaims in excitement and Josh tells her he has some big news. He informs her that his company want to make him Senior VP of the UK office, and Sam is surprised that he wants to move there.
He says it is a great opportunity and that he thought she'd be happy. Sam insists she is, but says that London is really far, and then asks about their house and her job. Josh replies that they'd sell their house and dismissively suggests that she can get a staff job at some London hospital.
Clearly concerned, she checks with him that it is a big promotion, and he describes it as "gigantic." He then leans over and kisses her on the cheek, as an overwhelmed Sam comes to terms with his news.
Meanwhile, at River Rock, Brent is working late at his desk. Julianne stops to talk before she leaves, suggesting he is burning the midnight oil. He replies that he is doing whatever it takes to get it done. She tells him that, if he keeps it up at this pace, the next best seller may be his.
Julianne leaves, advising Brent not to stay up too late. When she has gone though, he proceeds to write an email to Galvin wishing to discuss recent unprofessional actions by Julianne. He debates whether or not to send it, before deciding to and then reflecting on his actions.
Erica arrives back in her apartment building and knocks on Ethan's door, calling his name, but receives no answer. She then heads for her own apartment but finds it dark and empty inside.
Later on, she is lying on her bed when she hears a knock at the door and she opens it to find Ethan there. He asks how she is, and she admits bad. They go to sit down on the couch and Erica describes how worried and upset she is, and how she feels like she doesn't know what he's thinking or where his head is at.
Sitting down beside her, Ethan admits he's trying to figure that out himself. Erica says it feels like they keep having the same fight but don't talk about it and she tells him she doesn't know what's going on.
Ethan says he feels trapped, citing the toiletry kit, the talk of him sleeping over, and Erica's family. He says he doesn't want all the pressure and expectations, telling her he's not ready for them.
He admits he feels she is pushing him and that, despite the fact they've only been together a few weeks, Erica is acting like she's ready to get married. She wipes a tear away from her eye and Ethan asks her what she's sad about.
She says that she knows but doesn't want to tell him because it's really hard. She eventually confesses that she feels as if it doesn't work out with him then she really is never going to find anyone.
Ethan tries to reassure her, but Erica says she has been waiting a really long time to meet the right person. She begins to well up and says sometimes she's worried the reason it's taken her so long is because there's something wrong with her.
He tells her there's nothing wrong with her, that he loves her, and wants to be with her. However, he then admits that he doesn't know if he wants to marry her and bows his head as Erica digests this.
Ethan tells her it's too soon, and Erica implores him to continue. He rubs her arms and informs her he needs to take things more slowly and Erica admits that it makes sense. She says that it is irrational and a stupid insecurity of hers.
She admits she gets freaked out and then becomes even more paranoid and acts even crazier when he clams up. Emotional, Erica sighs and tells Ethan she gets why people don't talk to each other, as it is really intense. Ethan strokes her face and they hug.
The next morning, Erica quietly leaves Ethan sleeping as she makes her way out of the bedroom, stopping at the door to watch him sleep. She narrates:
"Conflict. It's everywhere you look. It touches everything we do, every relationship we have. Isn't it funny how, at their core, all fights are the same? Two people yelling, accusing, or running away. Two people doing anything to avoid telling one each other what they really feel.
"Just talk when you want to run. Reveal when you want to attack. It's so simple, so obvious, and, at the same time, so incredibly hard."
Erica makes her way to Goblins, where she finds Kai outside cleaning a table. She stops at the closed gate. She greets him and he turns around. She then opens the gate and goes up to him. She tells Kai she is going to say something to him and she knows it's going to sound crazy.
Moving around, cleaning, Kai stops her and replies that he knows what she is going to tell him, which intrigues Erica. He describes how a guy came up to him on the street one day and told him he could fix his life, all he needed was a comittment.
Erica can't believe what she's hearing and checks whether he sends him back in time too, which Kai confirms. Excited, she wonders what the chances are that she saw him go through that door and knew that what she was seeing could only mean.
However, before she can finish her thought, Kai interrupts her and asks for her to remind him of her name. She tells him, explaining how happy she is to finally meet someone who's going through the same thing, someone to just talk about it all with, who has been there.
Kai stops her and tells Erica not to take it the wrong way, but it's not going to be him. Erica is shocked. However, he informs her that, while happy to chat about vanilla syrup, TV shows, religion, or politics, he doesn't want to talk to her about time travelling or therapy.
Erica can't understand, and Kai tells her he gets that she won't, but explains he wanted to stop her before she got too excited. He tells her he'll see her around before heading back inside the coffee house, assuring Erica it's nothing personal.
She can't believe this and Erica walks away in disbelief.
Episode Guide
In Erica's bedroom, her and Ethan are debating something, while she narrates.
"Fighting. It's like eating, sleeping, breathing. We all do it, just in our own way. Some say that the success of a relationship depends on how we resolve conflict. Like it or not, how we fight matters."
We then see Erica and Ethan wrestling one another on the bed. She manages to get on top of him and pin him down, she then proceeds to lick his eyeball - despite him pleading with her not to.
Ethan then flips her over so that he is now on top of Erica and, despite her begging him not to, gets his own back by tickling her. Erica laughs and they end up making out. She then begins to undo his belt buckle and tells Ethan to get a condom.
Much to her disappointment, he informs her that they used the last one in the morning. Ethan then says that it's nearly midnight and he needs to get up early tomorrow anyway and apologises. He gets off Erica and sits on the edge of the bed.
Erica laments that he always has to get up early, but then suddenly springs off the bed, excited, and heads for her chest of drawers, telling Ethan she has got something for him.
She describes how he always has to rush home to shower and shave after spending the night at hers and, presenting him with a toiletry kit, says he now won't have to. Sitting on his lap, she then recommends that he keeps some clothes in her closet, swearing, despite appearing not, it does have space in it.
Ethan comments that it sounds like he's moving in, and Erica says it doesn't make sense for him to be paying rent next door when he's spending every night at hers. Ethan doesn't look convinced, and admits that it doesn't make sense that he never sleeps at home and suggests he should some time.
Thinking he's joking, Erica laughs at this idea until she realises Ethan is being serious. He tells her it's not that he doesn't enjoy sleeping at hers, but Erica gets off his lap and goes to lie down, upset, and says he doesn't need to explain himself.
She tells him she won't stop him sleeping at his own place and if he wants he should, suggesting he starts tonight. Ethan questions why she's making such a big thing out of it, and Erica apologises, admitting she's tired and being dumb. She insists she's totally fine and Ethan heads for the shower as Erica lies down and thinks.
"Conflict and relationships. They go hand in hand. Too bad then that most of us will do almost anything to avoid confrontation."
The next morning, Erica is awoken by her alarm clock. She glances over to her beside table, seeing Ethan's toiletry kit, which makes her slump back down in her bed.
Walking through the city on her way to work, Erica calls Ethan on her cell phone and asks him where he was in the morning. He tells her he had to go to the bank and is now running late and asks whether he can call her later.
Erica reminds him that it's Sam's birthday party in the evening, and Ethan sighs - having clearly forgotten. She checks whether he's made other plans, and he admits he had arranged to go for drinks with his friend Michael, but will cancel them.
He asks her what time she wants to meet him at her mom's. Erica is surprised at this question, thinking they would be going together, but tells him 7pm. Ethan says he'll see her then and hangs up, leaving Erica puzzled that he didn't even have time to say goodbye.
Erica then heads into Goblins where the young barista she thinks she saw going in for time-travelling therapy is working. She makes herself known and orders a latte. She says they haven't officially met yet, and introduces herself.
He shakes her hand and tells her his name is Kai, which she comments is a cool name. Erica then suggests that he doesn't remember her, describing herself as the "vanilla syrup girl," and reminding him of how he'd gone to the supply closet to get some for her seeing as they were out.
Kai doesn't answer, and Erica continues, telling him she was wondering what he had been doing in there, before admitting that she thinks she knows what he was doing because she does it too. Again, Kai doesn't respond, but simply hands Erica her latte.
Erica persists and asks him if he's ever been in therapy. He stares at her but doesn't reply, instead serving another customer and Erica decides to leave, with a freaked out Kai watching her as she does.
At River Rock, Erica and Meeri are working together as Brent walks past and exchanges an awkward hello. Erica feels sorry for him and Meeri comments that he is in a serious funk. She jokes that she will have a wager with Erica that he either quits or will be fired.
Erica is unhappy to hear this and suggests he just needs a little time because he really wanted to edit "the sex book." As this goes on, Brent, in the coffee lounge, is invited by Julianne to talk in her office.
This reminds Meeri that Julianne wants Erica to meet with some high profile authors for drinks in the evening, and suggests that night. Erica tells her she can't, explaining she and Ethan are going to her sister's 30th birthday celebration.
Meeri declares Ethan going as her date as "righteous" and Erica agrees, adding it's the first real family thing he will be attending as her boyfriend.
In Julianne's office, Brent sits down to talk with her and she asks him what the "dealio" is. He pretends not to understand what she's talking about, but she says they're adults and should be able to have a frank discussion before accusing him of being upset over "the sex book."
Brent insists he's fine, and Julianne assures him he's a good editor but says his last book was late and lacklustre. She advises him to step up his game and get back on top and Brent, eventually, replies that he will do his best to and apologises for disappointing her before leaving.
That evening, Sam's party is well underway as Erica waits by the front door waiting for Ethan to arrive. She looks at her watch and then checks her cell phone for any missed calls or messages from him.
She greets her dad, and Gary asks where Ethan is. Erica replies that she doesn't know and that he was supposed to be there. Just then Ethan arrives and Erica asks what took him so long. He apologises, explaining that traffic was terrible. She takes him by the hand to meet people.
Sitting down on the couch, Erica and Ethan are with Aunt Roberta, who is telling them how perfect she thought it was when she heard about the two of them from Barbara. Hearing her name, Erica's mom then comes over and tells Roberta she better not be talking about marriage.
The idea planted in her head, Roberta then informs Erica that she is planning on taking a cruise to Alaska in the summer and says she doesn't want to miss anything. Erica jokes that she will be sure to give her plenty of notice - a comment which makes Ethan perturbed.
Elsewhere, Josh is helping himself to some food when some kids running around bump into him, causing him to spill some egg onto his shoe, and he shouts at them. Sam tells him to get used to it, saying in a couple of years time it will be their little ones running around.
Josh suggests if they act like that they'll be kept on a leash, and Sam begins to talk about how they will look and her intention to take a couple of years off work, how her mom will be able to babysit whenever they need to, and how they need to buy a bigger house with a nice back yard - none of which seems to be enthusing Josh.
They turn their attentions to Erica and Ethan sitting on the couch, where Erica wipes something off Ethan's face, prompting Josh to make a "whipped" sound, which Sam tells him to stop.
Roberta is telling Erica about a couple she knows who are now getting divorced because they disagree about having kids. Ethan listens, overwhelmed, and when Roberta advises Erica to discuss such a thing before getting married, he begins to choke on his food.
He tells Erica something went down the wrong way and excuses himself. They watch him go, with Roberta and Barbara commenting on how darling and handsome Ethan is, and Erica concurs.
Instead of heading to the bathroom though, Ethan goes outside to his car, where he gets inside and turns on some music - looking to chill out.
A while later, Erica knocks on the bathroom door, checking whether Ethan is in there, but finds it empty. She walks down the stairs and finds Ethan, and asks him where he has been as he had gone to the bathroom half an hour ago.
Ethan tells her he needed some air and Barbara then comes up to them, ushering them to where they are going to take a picture of the family and she shouts for everyone to gather.
Erica, confused by Ethan's behaviour, questions why he left without telling her and he replies that he didn't think he had to tell her every time he left the room. She is shocked by his flippant attitude, but she doesn't have time to respond as Barbara begins arranging people for the photo.
She goes over to the camera and Ethan suggests that she should be in the photo and he will take it instead. Barbara tells him it's on a timer, but Erica says Ethan should take it if he doesn't want to be in the picture, and wonders whether he just needs some air.
Ethan tells her he didn't realise it was on a timer and was just trying to help out. Noticing this, Josh then jokes that if Ethan thinks dating a Strange is tough, he should try marrying one, which displeases Sam and Erica appears stony faced.
Barbara sets the camera and the picture is taken and directly afterwards Erica asks to speak with Ethan. Once alone, she rages at him - asking what his problem is. Ethan denies he has one and asks why Erica has to make a big deal out of everything.
She can't believe him, pointing to him sulking through every conversation, going missing for half an hour, and then bailing on a simple picture. Erica wonders whether being her boyfriend is a burden on him, but he tells her she's being ridiculous.
Erica then questions whether he wants to be in their relationship, because he's not acting like it. Shocked at this accusation, Ethan walks out of the door and leaves, and Erica, annoyed, heads for the French Windows to go outside and get some air herself.
However, instead she finds herself walking into Dr. Tom's office where she immediately appeals for his help and asks him to tell her why Ethan is being a "passive aggressive, insensitive, game-playing..."
Before she can finish her description though, he interjects, telling her: "The course of true love never did run smooth." She looks around to where he stands, behind her chair, reading a book, and smiles at him.
This intrigues Dr. Tom, but Erica explains that she's pleased to be back there with him, and he smiles back. He goes to sit down on his chair, and returns to the topic of Ethan. She bemoans that, every time he doesn't like something, he runs away.
Erica begins to suggest it's impossible to communicate with him, but Dr. Tom interjects and wonders whether Erica really was trying to "communicate" with Ethan. She believes it was obvious she was.
Unconvinced, Dr. Tom begins to flip through her list before selecting the one he wants, asking her about, "Malcolm Abrams, Camp Wakini." Erica is surprised to hear his name, commenting that she hasn't seen him in years.
She explains that he was her best friend until she turned into Satan, adding that that sounds familiar. Erica tells Dr. Tom that her and Malcolm met at Camp Wakini as kids and that they would spend hours talking with one another on the docks.
Erica says senior year had started great, when Malcolm smuggled in some weed. She teased him as he was not the type, but they they go into the woods and get high off it and laugh until their stomachs hurt. She says it didn't take long until their relationship became romantic - then it all fell apart.
Dr. Tom asks how, but she admits she doesn't really know. Erica recalls how she thought it was going really well until he dumped her out of the blue with no explanation before hooking up the next day with a 14-year-old, Rachel Zimmerman.
She says Malcolm changed overnight and wouldn't even talk to her so, to get back at him, she called him a cradle robber, painting a flag reading 'Malcolm Jail Bait Abrams.' Dr. Tom suggests this was creative, and Erica admits she was pretty pleased with herself until Malcom framed her.
Erica explains that Malcolm had planted his disc man, boxer shorts, and a lock of his hair in her stuff and then told everyone that he'd been robbed and it must be the work of a stalker. When her cabin had been searched they had found his stuff and Erica had been sent home, labelled a thief, and wasn't asked back as staff.
She says it bothers her today that Malcolm could just turn on her like he did, and how he could go overnight from her best friend to her worst enemy. Dr. Tom asks what will she do this time and she says she'd rather ignore him.
Erica admits she provoked him with her flag and it got her kicked out, and it wasn't worth it. She says if she could re-write her history she would just enjoy the summer, hang out with her friends, and pretend that Malcolm Abrams didn't exist.
Suddenly, Erica finds herself transported back to the camp, where she is sitting with Jenny, painting the flag about Malcolm. Realising what's going on, she suddenly tips over a tin of black paint over the flag, pretending to Jenny that it was an accident.
They head into a cabin where some other girls are practising for their air band routine. Jenny laments that she wasted an hour painting the flag. One of the girls, Sari, asks if they got caught and Jenny, referring to Erica, informs Sari that "split personality girl" chickened out.
Erica insists that isn't the case, and she has just changed her mind. She tells them that getting into a public war with Malcolm isn't a good idea and she would rather just ignore him. Jenny wonders whether Erica knows what he is saying about her, and Sari tells her Malcolm is calling her crazy and a stalker.
She continues, saying Malcolm described how Erica cried when he dumped her and that she had threatened to kill herself. Erica refutes this and Jenny says Malcolm is ruining her reputation and needs a taste of his own medicine.
Sari reminds Erica that she was dumped for Rachel Zimmerman who she describes as a "baby." She then comes up with the idea of stuffing Malcolm's bed with diapers, which Jenny loves.
However, Erica reiterates they will be ignoring Malcolm as he is not worth it and she doesn't care what he says or does. She insists that they don't retaliate and that, as he is her ex, she gets to decide.
Later, by the lake, Erica, Jenny, and Sari are lying on the sand, relaxing, as Malcolm hangs out nearby with some of his friends. Rachel then makes her way towards them, with Erica surprised by just how young she looks, as well as appearing scared.
Jenny suggests that Erica goes over and makes her cry, but Erica instead gets up and says she wants to tell Rachel she has no hard feelings. Erica approaches Rachel and begins to talk but, seeing this, Malcolm comes running over.
He demands to know what Erica has been saying, and Jenny comes over and enquires as to what his "damage" is. Malcolm's friend, Gibby, says he is acting psycho but Malcolm suggests Erica is trying to "talk shit" about him. Jenny claims that is what he's doing.
Keen to avoid any confrontation though, Erica leads Jenny and Sari away, asking them to consider what the Buddha would do. Jenny doesn't find this amusing, but Erica says she's just trying to avoid war.
They are interrupted by the camp supervisor coming over and telling them that air band will be beginning in 15 minutes. Malcolm and Rachel share a kiss, before Gibby asks Malcolm what he is doing. Malcolm replies that Erica is obsessed with him and is crazy. Gibby makes light of these suggestions, and they get into an argument.
Erica's air band is getting ready to perform in front of the watching audience. Clearly rusty, she struggles to keep up with everyone else, having to improvise and wing her way through it. However, the audience clap them off at the end.
As they come off stage, with Erica apologising for her performance and admitting she deserves to just be on tape duty, she discovers Malcolm waiting to talk to her backstage. He says that the summer is too short to be fighting with her and suggest a truce, which Erica accepts.
He then heads on stage to take part in the boy's air band routine, and checks Erica will be sticking around to watch. She tells him she will but, suspicious of his behaviour, informs Jenny she has to leave and check on something.
Erica heads back to her cabin and finds that Malcolm has once again hidden his stuff under her belongings. She can't believe this and, having placed them in a bag, she heads off fuming. However, her walk through the woods is interrupted as Dr. Tom, pruning trees, calls out to her.
He suggests it's a beautiful day for air band before noticing Erica doesn't look happy. She exclaims that Malcolm once again hid his stuff - describing how he called a truce only to stab her in the back. Dr. Tom suggests this is strange and wonders why Malcolm did it.
Erica follows him around as he continues to prune trees and suggests Malcolm is crazy. She says that Jenny and Sari were right and that she has been doing things wrong. She compares Malcolm to an animal who has sensed her weakness and then gone for the jugular.
She concludes that she needs to fight back and Dr. Tom responds that, "Returning violence with violence only multiplies violence." Erica disagrees, saying there is a flaw in that theory.
He asks her to enlighten him, and she tells him that the cycle of violence continues only until someone wins. Erica says she didn't get kicked out last time because she fought back, but because she didn't go far enough. She declares that she lost, but this time she will win when she stays and Malcolm goes.
Dr. Tom infers that winning is Erica's solution, and she argues that it is because she's done everything else and asks him to tell her if there's another option, as she doesn't see it. Erica says that Malcolm will not stop until she is kicked out, which Dr. Tom chuckles at.
She begins to walk away from him, telling Dr. Tom he can throw all the riddles he wants at her, but she is getting to the point where she doesn't care. Erica says one of her and Malcolm has to go and this time it's not going to be her. She walks away, proclaiming that Malcolm is going down.
Later on, Erica is down by the lake, watching on as Malcolm jokes about with some other girls. Gibby then comes up to Erica, checking who she is sharing a tent with and informing her he'll be sharing with Malcolm.
He tells Erica that ever since Malcolm broke up with her he's been weird, and that he has added being mean to his usual paranoid self. He wonders what happened to Malcolm. Just then, Malcolm shouts over to Gibby, asking him if he's going to get going or if he will be spending all his time drooling over Erica.
Then, the camp supervisor comes over, instructing the girls around Malcolm to get their canoes ready before asking to speak to Malcolm for a second. Seeing this, Erica smiles, knowingly, to herself.
The supervisor tells Malcolm she has received an anonymous note informing her that he has drugs in his cabin. Malcolm is shocked to hear this, and tells her it's not true. She warns him that, if they find anything, he will be on the first bus home. Malcolm turns around and sees Erica smiling at him.
Later, Erica, Jenny, and Sari are in a canoe paddling on the lake. They pass Malcolm, sitting by the lakeside, who asks to talk with Erica alone, and he tells her to bring her pack with her.
Walking through the woods together, Malcolm suggests it was a nice try on Erica's behalf but wonders whether she really thought he'd be stupid enough to keep drugs in his cabin. Erica asks if the whole point of their conversation was so he can rub it in her face.
Malcolm says he think they should stay away from one another, but Erica reminds him that he was the one who called a truce and broke it. She tells him to forget it, as she doesn't trust anything he says.
Erica states he has driven her to the point that she is acting like him. Malcolm can't believe she is claiming to be totally innocent though. However, in their argument, they miss the turning for their destination, Smoke Lake.
Still walking, Erica asks what she did to him and Malcolm sarcastically replies nothing, suggesting Erica is perfect. She says she can't believe she was ever friends with him and he says that that is something they can agree on.
They arrive at the lake, but are surprised to see nobody else there. Malcolm then notices the sign reads Little Joe Lake. Erica comments they are supposed to be at Smoke Lake and Malcolm is angry they have come to the wrong lake.
Erica says they'll just double back and find the right path and they head off. However, after more walking around, they then find themselves at Big Joe Lake. Erica can't believe it, and takes off her pack, as does Malcolm - who sits down on his.
She suggests that if they just wait it out then the others will realise they're lost and send out a tripper to find them. She takes a bag of food from her pack and begins to eat, offering Malcolm some. He doesn't respond though.
Erica then begins to construct the tent, telling him it's getting dark and they may have to spend the night if they're not found. Malcolm says she is building the tent wrong and takes over, suggesting she goes to look for firewood instead. However, he then changes his mind and says she shouldn't go by herself.
They hunt for wood, and Erica wonders if he is worried she is going to whack herself in the face with a branch. Malcolm explains that there are bears in the woods and Erica jokes that he would be able to fight one off her if it attacked. He replies he would if he had too.
Erica suggests this is noble considering he's spent the last week trying to get rid of her. Malcolm concurs, adding though that he doesn't want her killed.
They continue walking, when Erica suddenly stops and asks Malcolm whether he heard a sound. He thinks she is joking, but she tells him to be quiet. He suggests it was just a raccoon but they then hear a bigger noise and Erica rules out it being a raccoon.
Stopping to look around, Erica freaks that it's a bear, but Malcolm isn't convinced. They then hear the animal make a grunting noise and begin to run away quickly. They stop again, holding one another for protection and comfort as they try to spot the animal.
They're relieved to see it is only a deer and relax. Erica says she is an idiot and Malcolm comments that she always reacts like this, reminding her of the bat which Erica remembers breaking the cabin door because of.
The deer eats something from Erica's pack and then leaves. Malcolm also recalls the tree frog which scared Erica and says he would have protected her. She replies that she knows he would, and tells him he always took her seriously, even when she got all crazy.
They return to their spot by the lake and sit down. Erica says she doesn't get how they went from spending every day together to hating each other. They agree that it sucks, and she tells him she's looking at him and thinking that he is the guy who used to be her best friend.
Erica says she really misses that guy and wants to know why it all fell apart. Malcolm bows his head as he listens to this, and she suggests they should talk about it. He jokes that he's so thirsty he can barely form sentences and Erica goes to the lake to fill her flask with water.
Malcolm takes the opportunity to walk back into the woods and, when Erica returns, she finds him anxiously pacing around. As she approaches him, he suddenly pulls her towards him and kisses her. Erica pulls away, shocked, and asks him what he's doing.
He tells her not to talk and suggests they just start over. Malcolm says he wasn't ready but now he is. Erica reminds him about Rachel, but he insists he wants Erica and not her. She is confused, but Malcolm goes to try and kiss her again.
Erica resists and he says he thought it was what she wanted. Erica restates her desire to talk. Malcolm tells her to forget talking and kisses her. She breaks it again and notices that his hands are shaking.
Malcolm then pushes her up against a tree, forcing himself on her as he kisses her. Erica angrily pushes him off, screaming for him to get off. Malcolm is shocked at his own behaviour and Erica can't believe what he is doing.
He tries to explain his actions, and Erica wants to know why one minute he is her friend and the next becoming a monster. Malcolm intimiates that he knows, and she suggests it's like he can't decide whether he likes her or whether she repulses him.
Malcolm is pacing around, and she asks if he has any idea what it's like to feel like you're disgusting. He stops at this comment, as Erica explains that's why she tried to pretend he didn't exist and why she tried to destroy him - because she was so hurt.
Getting emotional, he says there's nothing wrong with her, and that it's him, and he tells her that he's gay. Erica is surprised, and he asks her not to tell anybody. Erica says she would never and Malcolm suggests she must think he is a freak.
Erica replies not at all, telling him she wishes he had told her before, and asking why he didn't. Malcolm can't believe she thinks he would have told her the one thing she could have used to wreck his whole life and Erica concedes the stupidity of her question.
He holds his head in his hands as Erica comments that it all finally makes sense. She says that she can only imagine how hard it was for him to tell her, but assures him that she's the last person who will betray or judge him - pointing out that her Uncle Ruby is gay.
Erica then admits that she kissed a girl once, adding that it was good. She then tells Malcolm that Brandon from his cabin is also gay. He rejects this idea, but she adds that he should give him ten years.
Malcolm states that he can't believe he's talking to Erica about this, but she tells him it's better than not talking about it. She then suggests that he should go for Brandon, as he is "totally hot," before accepting that it may be too much for Malcolm at that moment.
He then spots Gibby in a canoe on the lake and Erica runs to the lake and shouts out to them. Gibby tells them the whole camp is looking for them and Erica apologises. She then holds Malcolm's hand and says they got a little distracted.
When asked if they're back together, she tells them they could say that, and smiles at Malcolm, who smiles back at Erica and says that they're all good. Erica then begins to head to get into the canoe but trips over.
However, she then finds herself tripping over in her backyard back in the present day. She looks up to see Dr. Tom standing over her, and asks him if the trip was really necessary. She gets up off the ground and he comments that it's a beautiful night for a walk.
Erica says she needs to go and talk to Ethan, which Dr. Tom suggests is a novel idea. She exclaims that it's unbelievable that her friendship with Malcolm ended because they never talked about what was going on.
She tells him that the thing that killed her was it's simplicity, and she wonders why she just didn't ask Malcolm what was going on. Dr. Tom replies that it's because talking as a means of resolving conflict goes against every biological instinct that we have.
He explains that when we feel threatened we fight or, if we don't have the stomach for that, we run. Erica suggests this is what Ethan did, and Dr. Tom agrees, stating Ethan ran and that Malcolm attacked.
Erica suggests that Malcolm was different as he had a secret, but Dr. Tom questions whether she thinks he is the only one. She wonders what he means, and Dr. Tom tells her sometimes we fight because we're simply unable to tell the other person how we really feel.
She realises he is referring to her, but insists that she has always been honest with Ethan. Dr. Tom asks her if she's sure about that and that, as long as she's sure, it's good. He then wishes her goodnight, leaving Erica contemplating.
Meanwhile, Sam and Josh are in the car, also making their way home from her party. He tells her he's exhausted and she replies that she isn't tired at all, suggesting that it could be because she's ovulating. Josh smirks, and wonders if this is supposed to turn him on.
Sam replies that she's wondering whether he wants to, but Josh replies that what he wants to do is give Sam her birthday present. He then hands her some plane tickets, which she opens to discover they are for going to London.
She exclaims in excitement and Josh tells her he has some big news. He informs her that his company want to make him Senior VP of the UK office, and Sam is surprised that he wants to move there.
He says it is a great opportunity and that he thought she'd be happy. Sam insists she is, but says that London is really far, and then asks about their house and her job. Josh replies that they'd sell their house and dismissively suggests that she can get a staff job at some London hospital.
Clearly concerned, she checks with him that it is a big promotion, and he describes it as "gigantic." He then leans over and kisses her on the cheek, as an overwhelmed Sam comes to terms with his news.
Meanwhile, at River Rock, Brent is working late at his desk. Julianne stops to talk before she leaves, suggesting he is burning the midnight oil. He replies that he is doing whatever it takes to get it done. She tells him that, if he keeps it up at this pace, the next best seller may be his.
Julianne leaves, advising Brent not to stay up too late. When she has gone though, he proceeds to write an email to Galvin wishing to discuss recent unprofessional actions by Julianne. He debates whether or not to send it, before deciding to and then reflecting on his actions.
Erica arrives back in her apartment building and knocks on Ethan's door, calling his name, but receives no answer. She then heads for her own apartment but finds it dark and empty inside.
Later on, she is lying on her bed when she hears a knock at the door and she opens it to find Ethan there. He asks how she is, and she admits bad. They go to sit down on the couch and Erica describes how worried and upset she is, and how she feels like she doesn't know what he's thinking or where his head is at.
Sitting down beside her, Ethan admits he's trying to figure that out himself. Erica says it feels like they keep having the same fight but don't talk about it and she tells him she doesn't know what's going on.
Ethan says he feels trapped, citing the toiletry kit, the talk of him sleeping over, and Erica's family. He says he doesn't want all the pressure and expectations, telling her he's not ready for them.
He admits he feels she is pushing him and that, despite the fact they've only been together a few weeks, Erica is acting like she's ready to get married. She wipes a tear away from her eye and Ethan asks her what she's sad about.
She says that she knows but doesn't want to tell him because it's really hard. She eventually confesses that she feels as if it doesn't work out with him then she really is never going to find anyone.
Ethan tries to reassure her, but Erica says she has been waiting a really long time to meet the right person. She begins to well up and says sometimes she's worried the reason it's taken her so long is because there's something wrong with her.
He tells her there's nothing wrong with her, that he loves her, and wants to be with her. However, he then admits that he doesn't know if he wants to marry her and bows his head as Erica digests this.
Ethan tells her it's too soon, and Erica implores him to continue. He rubs her arms and informs her he needs to take things more slowly and Erica admits that it makes sense. She says that it is irrational and a stupid insecurity of hers.
She admits she gets freaked out and then becomes even more paranoid and acts even crazier when he clams up. Emotional, Erica sighs and tells Ethan she gets why people don't talk to each other, as it is really intense. Ethan strokes her face and they hug.
The next morning, Erica quietly leaves Ethan sleeping as she makes her way out of the bedroom, stopping at the door to watch him sleep. She narrates:
"Conflict. It's everywhere you look. It touches everything we do, every relationship we have. Isn't it funny how, at their core, all fights are the same? Two people yelling, accusing, or running away. Two people doing anything to avoid telling one each other what they really feel.
"Just talk when you want to run. Reveal when you want to attack. It's so simple, so obvious, and, at the same time, so incredibly hard."
Erica makes her way to Goblins, where she finds Kai outside cleaning a table. She stops at the closed gate. She greets him and he turns around. She then opens the gate and goes up to him. She tells Kai she is going to say something to him and she knows it's going to sound crazy.
Moving around, cleaning, Kai stops her and replies that he knows what she is going to tell him, which intrigues Erica. He describes how a guy came up to him on the street one day and told him he could fix his life, all he needed was a comittment.
Erica can't believe what she's hearing and checks whether he sends him back in time too, which Kai confirms. Excited, she wonders what the chances are that she saw him go through that door and knew that what she was seeing could only mean.
However, before she can finish her thought, Kai interrupts her and asks for her to remind him of her name. She tells him, explaining how happy she is to finally meet someone who's going through the same thing, someone to just talk about it all with, who has been there.
Kai stops her and tells Erica not to take it the wrong way, but it's not going to be him. Erica is shocked. However, he informs her that, while happy to chat about vanilla syrup, TV shows, religion, or politics, he doesn't want to talk to her about time travelling or therapy.
Erica can't understand, and Kai tells her he gets that she won't, but explains he wanted to stop her before she got too excited. He tells her he'll see her around before heading back inside the coffee house, assuring Erica it's nothing personal.
She can't believe this and Erica walks away in disbelief.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Being Dr. Tom: Analysis
Season 2, Episode 1: Being Dr. Tom
Analysis
Question: How do you follow up a sensational ending to Season 1? Answer: With an equally intense and intriguing opening episode to Season 2. It really is no mean feat by the writers, but they manage it and then some.
Of course, it begins on the cliffhanger at the end of Season 1 - Erica being introduced to her "new therapist" Dr. Naadiah, and the fall out of the breaking of her promise over Leo to Dr. Tom.
It also allows us, after seeing previously Erica's relationships with her family, friends, and the opposite sex - to have an insight into her other relationship - that between herself and Dr. Tom.
When you consider the major argument between the two and how angry and hurt Dr. Tom felt - coupled with how scared she had been when he lost his temper at her - the events at the beginning of Season 2 actually highlight how strong the bond is between them.
Erica is determined that, if she is to continue with her therapy, it will be with Dr. Tom. She has forgiven him for his outburst, recognising the part she played in angering him. She insists to Dr. Naadiah that she must see Dr. Tom, must talk to him, that she is not her therapist.
Then, when she is sent back in time to 1998 and encounters the troubled Tom, she throws herself into trying to help him. Spending so much time talking to him, trying to find out more information, trying to get him to open up.
Look how she is worried about him when the bouncers manhandle him out of the bar, how sad she is when she realises Tom doesn't know her, and she is also adamant that she will try and help Tom and talk him down from jumping off the building. Erica cares.
And so does Dr. Tom, even despite his decision to quit which, probably partially truthfully, he declares has been made with Erica in mind. He is dismayed with how he treated her, how he grabbed and hurt her - someone he cares about.
It is also the reason why he is so keen that Erica doesn't discover his dark past, and as Dr. Naadiah points out - the reason he confronts both her and Erica in the past is because he does still care, whatever he might say.
That's part of an interesting dimension of the episode, and indeed, the second season, with Dr. Tom interacting with fellow therapists. The scenes between him and Dr. Naadiah are great - when she uses a quote against him it's particularly funny too.
During Season 2, we see this whole expansion of the therapists and therapy and time travelling. It adds an extra layer on from Season 1, and this exploration is crucial to Erica's progress.
And progress there has been. Erica says as much, Julianne recognises as much, and it's why Erica fights so hard for Dr. Tom. She credits him for helping her to turn her life around. Now she wants to try and repay the favour back in 1998.
It leads to an emotional scene between them as they reconcile back in his office. Erica has already been crying as she tries to research him on the web, and then wishes and hopes and prays that, when she opens her front door, he will be on the other side.
Her relief and happiness at being back with him in his office is plain to see. She is perfectly willing to waver his apology but Dr. Tom insists that he explains.
This is new too, as the Tom we see in 1998, although still caring about Erica and the fact she works in the bar she does, is not willing to be open and explain to her about his life. Not so with Dr. Tom, and perhaps this is a reaction to him seeing what he means to Erica.
He takes her back in time with him to 1996, explaining what happened with his daughter, and opening himself up to her as she has done with him. Never an easy thing opening up, I know it's not one of my strengths.
However, ultimately they ensure they are "good" with Erica convincing Dr. Tom that he is the right therapist for her because he is human, he does make mistakes, he was, as she correctly points out, like her.
It's a great line too, "The one regret I don't have, Dr. Tom, is you," which clearly means a lot to him. Their therapy is back on track.
As big a fan as I am of Dr. Tom, it was still quite interesting seeing a different therapist in Dr. Naadiah and her far more calm approach. However, it seems playing around is ubiquitous with the therapists - as Dr. Naadiah reappears in 1998 as a pool player, joking about Erica's regrets, and, like Dr. Tom, never gives Erica all the answers she desires.
I guess she's a bit like the substitute teacher who, although being qualified and good at their job, is just not the person you're used to, and never will be. Certainly Dr. Naadiah is no Dr. Tom but it's good to see her crop up again later in the season.
Before I move on from Erica's time travelling, just how hot did Erin look in this episode? The while cowgirl hat and cropped shirt exposing her midriff - a good way to begin the season.
The first episode also opens up two other strands which run throughout the season. Firstly, Erica's work focusing on "the sex book," and the fall out from Brent being overlooked by Julianne.
We also got to see some more crazy Friedkin stuff. I can imagine the actor playing him had so much fun doing that role, as the guy is nuts. Him and Julianne together are pure comedy gold.
However, the real drama and mystery is saved until right at the end. Now that's great writing. Just when you think the whole thing is back on course and Erica and Dr. Tom have reconciled, Erica discovers another fellow therapy patient.
I remember being stunned the first time I saw it, you just never expected that to happen. However, as we know, it turns out to be pivotal in Erica's development both in her therapy and in her personal life. Did someone mention a spanner in the works?
On a final note, the start of a new season means new opening titles - and I personally love them. Although the music to Being Erica starts off quite light it does actually build to a climax - and I don't feel the Season 1 titles recognised that as much in its images.
However, with the rapid and frenetic montage of images that comes in the Season 2 music, I think it works brilliantly. It's also a great way to not only convey the madness of the time travelling and her regrets, but also show lots of moments from Season 1.
Having spent ages trying to slow the whole down and watch it frame by frame, I think they include images from Season 2 of Erica on her do-over day, her screaming when Tom jumps off the building, and her and a freshly showered Ethan in her apartment.
Then from Season 1 there's her looking in the mirror, dancing and making out with Cassidy, having sex in the canoe, and looking out of the window with Dr. Tom at Sam's wedding.
There are another couple which are hard to identify, but it shows the complexity of all those images together so rapidly. Overall though, like the beginning to Season 2 itself, it's impossible to give it anything but a thumbs up.
Analysis
Question: How do you follow up a sensational ending to Season 1? Answer: With an equally intense and intriguing opening episode to Season 2. It really is no mean feat by the writers, but they manage it and then some.
Of course, it begins on the cliffhanger at the end of Season 1 - Erica being introduced to her "new therapist" Dr. Naadiah, and the fall out of the breaking of her promise over Leo to Dr. Tom.
It also allows us, after seeing previously Erica's relationships with her family, friends, and the opposite sex - to have an insight into her other relationship - that between herself and Dr. Tom.
When you consider the major argument between the two and how angry and hurt Dr. Tom felt - coupled with how scared she had been when he lost his temper at her - the events at the beginning of Season 2 actually highlight how strong the bond is between them.
Erica is determined that, if she is to continue with her therapy, it will be with Dr. Tom. She has forgiven him for his outburst, recognising the part she played in angering him. She insists to Dr. Naadiah that she must see Dr. Tom, must talk to him, that she is not her therapist.
Then, when she is sent back in time to 1998 and encounters the troubled Tom, she throws herself into trying to help him. Spending so much time talking to him, trying to find out more information, trying to get him to open up.
Look how she is worried about him when the bouncers manhandle him out of the bar, how sad she is when she realises Tom doesn't know her, and she is also adamant that she will try and help Tom and talk him down from jumping off the building. Erica cares.
And so does Dr. Tom, even despite his decision to quit which, probably partially truthfully, he declares has been made with Erica in mind. He is dismayed with how he treated her, how he grabbed and hurt her - someone he cares about.
It is also the reason why he is so keen that Erica doesn't discover his dark past, and as Dr. Naadiah points out - the reason he confronts both her and Erica in the past is because he does still care, whatever he might say.
That's part of an interesting dimension of the episode, and indeed, the second season, with Dr. Tom interacting with fellow therapists. The scenes between him and Dr. Naadiah are great - when she uses a quote against him it's particularly funny too.
During Season 2, we see this whole expansion of the therapists and therapy and time travelling. It adds an extra layer on from Season 1, and this exploration is crucial to Erica's progress.
And progress there has been. Erica says as much, Julianne recognises as much, and it's why Erica fights so hard for Dr. Tom. She credits him for helping her to turn her life around. Now she wants to try and repay the favour back in 1998.
It leads to an emotional scene between them as they reconcile back in his office. Erica has already been crying as she tries to research him on the web, and then wishes and hopes and prays that, when she opens her front door, he will be on the other side.
Her relief and happiness at being back with him in his office is plain to see. She is perfectly willing to waver his apology but Dr. Tom insists that he explains.
This is new too, as the Tom we see in 1998, although still caring about Erica and the fact she works in the bar she does, is not willing to be open and explain to her about his life. Not so with Dr. Tom, and perhaps this is a reaction to him seeing what he means to Erica.
He takes her back in time with him to 1996, explaining what happened with his daughter, and opening himself up to her as she has done with him. Never an easy thing opening up, I know it's not one of my strengths.
However, ultimately they ensure they are "good" with Erica convincing Dr. Tom that he is the right therapist for her because he is human, he does make mistakes, he was, as she correctly points out, like her.
It's a great line too, "The one regret I don't have, Dr. Tom, is you," which clearly means a lot to him. Their therapy is back on track.
As big a fan as I am of Dr. Tom, it was still quite interesting seeing a different therapist in Dr. Naadiah and her far more calm approach. However, it seems playing around is ubiquitous with the therapists - as Dr. Naadiah reappears in 1998 as a pool player, joking about Erica's regrets, and, like Dr. Tom, never gives Erica all the answers she desires.
I guess she's a bit like the substitute teacher who, although being qualified and good at their job, is just not the person you're used to, and never will be. Certainly Dr. Naadiah is no Dr. Tom but it's good to see her crop up again later in the season.
Before I move on from Erica's time travelling, just how hot did Erin look in this episode? The while cowgirl hat and cropped shirt exposing her midriff - a good way to begin the season.
The first episode also opens up two other strands which run throughout the season. Firstly, Erica's work focusing on "the sex book," and the fall out from Brent being overlooked by Julianne.
We also got to see some more crazy Friedkin stuff. I can imagine the actor playing him had so much fun doing that role, as the guy is nuts. Him and Julianne together are pure comedy gold.
However, the real drama and mystery is saved until right at the end. Now that's great writing. Just when you think the whole thing is back on course and Erica and Dr. Tom have reconciled, Erica discovers another fellow therapy patient.
I remember being stunned the first time I saw it, you just never expected that to happen. However, as we know, it turns out to be pivotal in Erica's development both in her therapy and in her personal life. Did someone mention a spanner in the works?
On a final note, the start of a new season means new opening titles - and I personally love them. Although the music to Being Erica starts off quite light it does actually build to a climax - and I don't feel the Season 1 titles recognised that as much in its images.
However, with the rapid and frenetic montage of images that comes in the Season 2 music, I think it works brilliantly. It's also a great way to not only convey the madness of the time travelling and her regrets, but also show lots of moments from Season 1.
Having spent ages trying to slow the whole down and watch it frame by frame, I think they include images from Season 2 of Erica on her do-over day, her screaming when Tom jumps off the building, and her and a freshly showered Ethan in her apartment.
Then from Season 1 there's her looking in the mirror, dancing and making out with Cassidy, having sex in the canoe, and looking out of the window with Dr. Tom at Sam's wedding.
There are another couple which are hard to identify, but it shows the complexity of all those images together so rapidly. Overall though, like the beginning to Season 2 itself, it's impossible to give it anything but a thumbs up.
Being Dr. Tom
Season 2, Episode 1: Being Dr. Tom
Episode Guide
Erica is still in Dr. Naadiah's office, trying to digest what she has just been told. She asks what Naadiah is talking about. Naadiah tries to calm her, suggesting she sits down and that she knows she has been through a lot. Erica replies that she doesn't.
She tells Naadiah that she isn't her doctor and requests to speak with Dr. Tom. Naadiah tells her she can't, and Erica asks why she can't and where he is. Naadiah reminds Erica that Dr. Tom told her that her therapy is about her and her only.
However, Erica points out that they made a commitment to one another, together. Naadiah disagrees though, and says she is now here to help Erica honour her commitment, pointing out she isn't finished with her list or therapy.
Erica wonders if Dr. Tom is being punished for losing his temper, and admits that it was her fault too. She says that she broke her promise and he had a reason to be upset. Naadiah insists that no-one is punishing Dr. Tom though.
Upset, Erica demands to know why she can't see him, and Naadiah reluctantly explains that Dr. Tom has decided to quit and that Erica can't see him as he doesn't want to see her. Erica turns away at this revelation and, finding a door, walks through it.
She finds herself entering her apartment via her front door. She tries to compose herself, but then Naadiah opens the door and follows her in. Erica is surprised to see her - reminding her that Ethan is asleep in the next room.
Naadiah says that their conversation isn't over, but Erica is adamant that it is. She tells Naadiah that she is sure she is very qualified but tells her it has nothing to do with her. Erica reiterates that her commitment was to Dr. Tom and that if he has quit, so will she.
Realising she is getting nowhere, Naadiah agrees to go, telling Erica she will give her some time. Erica is left in her apartment, trying to come to terms with everything.
Erica and Ethan are walking through the city streets and she narrates:
"How do you know when you're done? When it's time to move on? Sometimes, the decision is impulsive. Other times you think it through but, no matter how we decide we're ready, the truth remains that the past is a hard thing to let go of."
Ethan asks her if she has plans for dinner and lets her know he's made reservations at Monsoon. Erica is impressed and asks why they are going somewhere so fancy. Ethan replies that she deserves it after going through a lot in the last few days.
Just then, a man passing them on the sidewalk bumps into Erica - spilling the coffee she was holding onto the floor. He apologises profusely and hands Erica some money for her and Ethan to get another drink - pointing to a "great" coffee house just across the road.
They head to the coffee house, called Goblins, and Erica orders two small lattes. She leans on the counter and sighs and the barista, a young guy, asks her if everything is OK. Erica replies that she's fine, but explains about being bumped into and her coffee being spilled all over the street.
Ethan then joins Erica and, noticing there's something up with her, says she has been on edge all morning and asks what's bothering her. Erica bluffs that she is nervous about work, explaining that Julianne is going to be announcing who will get what new book titles.
He assures her that she will get something great, joking that, albeit not at first, Julianne now loves her. The barista then returns with their lattes, telling Erica they're on the house and advising her not to let anyone else bump into her.
Erica arrives at River Rock and is greeted by an excited Brent who begins to follow her around. She excuses herself to go to the washroom but, before she can enter, he blocks her path and tells Erica he has some information.
She wonders if it can wait, but Brent describes how he hacked into Julianne's computer and has seen the list of new books. Erica's interest captured, Brent explains that there are four new books - including an as yet untitled sex book.
Erica is surprised, and Brent says he got a tingly feeling and his jaw hit the floor when he saw it. She assures him that she's sure he is going to get it, with Brent twice commenting that he has "seniority." He tells Erica that, as the "master of libido," he feels born to edit the book.
Meeri then interrupts and informs them that they're already five minutes late for the meeting and Erica and Brent rush into the meeting room and apologise for their tardiness. Julianne quotes to them from The Secret of Now, with its author, Thomas Friedkin, explaining that Secret 89 reads "always be on time."
Julianne then starts the meeting, welcoming Friedkin, who she explains has come on board to help with their other self-help projects as well as writing his new book - The Mystery of Tomorrow.
He goes to sit down next to Erica, assuring them that he hasn't come to "bury Caesar, but to praise him" and that they shouldn't "get their knickers in a knot," confirming to a clearly unimpressed Erica that he has just said "knickers."
Julianne continues, telling them River Rock will be stepping outside of the box and traipsing down a very different road over the coming year, with Friedkin confirming their biggest title will be a sex book. Brent and Erica try to feign surprise.
She says that the book will revolutionise the sex help industry and, to everyone's surprise, announces that Erica will be the "lucky editor" to lead them through their sexual revolution. Brent is stunned at this revelation, and Erica can't believe it herself.
Julianne tells her that Erica deserves a lot of the credit for Stahl's book being put to bed in record time and, with the first few chapters of The None being so impressive, she and Galvin had concluded Erica deserved this shot. She then tells Brent he will be working on a book about origami.
After the meeting, Brent is quick to leave and Erica tries to catch him. He pretends to be power walking as Erica attempts to apologise to him, but he tells her he's fine and that it's a business.
He points to the success of Erica's last book compared to his and insists he can deal with it. Brent then leaves, although he is clearly pained when overhearing Meeri congratulate Erica.
Meanwhile, on top of a building in the city, Dr. Tom is gazing into the distance, deep in thought. Naadiah then approaches him and he tells her that he's not going to change his mind. She informs him of Erica's decision to quit, telling Dr. Tom she wants him or she's done.
He replies that it is just an initial reaction, and that Erica will come around. Naadiah wonders what will happen if she doesn't, and Dr. Tom states that if she doesn't it is her choice, before restating that he's made his.
Naadiah stands beside him, commenting that this is the Tom she remembers. He agrees with her, saying he's not cut out to be Erica's or anybody else's doctor. Naadiah suggests that Erica doesn't see it that way, but Dr. Tom reminds her that he grabbed Erica.
He describes how he got so angry he could feel it, and tells Naadiah it was just like "before" - not being able to think straight or stop himself. Dr. Tom concludes that Erica needs someone else, someone more together, and he agrees when Naadiah suggests someone like her.
She asks him why it feels like he is running away, he rejects this idea though, saying he has thought things through and that it is the right choice, adding "for Erica."
"Fear is the mind killer," Naadiah quotes at him. He tells her not to, and she agrees that it is annoying, before leaving him alone.
That evening, Erica and Ethan are at Monsoon for dinner, and she explains to him her surprise at being chosen over Brent to edit the sex book. Erica says she feels terrible, but Ethan tells her not to feel guilty and that tonight is about how great things are.
Erica agrees, describing how much has changed in the last six months and that she feels a million miles away from where she was when he first moved to Toronto. Ethan raises his glass, proposing a toast to her new project, and Erica adds to a fresh start, leaving the past behind, and looking ahead.
Just then, her cell phone rings and Ethan retrieves it for her from her purse. He notices that Dr. Naadiah is calling her, and asks Erica who she is. Erica is shocked, and tells him it is just work.
She tries to change the conversation onto what to eat, but a waiter then comes over and confirms that she is Erica Strange. He then informs her that Dr. Naadiah has called the restaurant and is on the phone for her. Ethan is surprised that she has called the restaurant, and Erica excuses herself to take care of the call.
Erica takes the phone and walks a safe distance away from the table before speaking. Dr. Naadiah apologises for the interruption, but insists that they need to talk. Erica, still walking, says they have nothing to talk about.
However, as she reminds her that she has quit, Erica suddenly finds herself passing straight through a wall and into Dr. Naadiah's office. Erica is stunned, but Dr. Naadiah tells her she's concerned she's making an impulsive decision.
Erica suggests that Dr. Naadiah doesn't know her at all, but she replies that she just wants Erica to think it through and ensure this is really what she wants. She is adamant that it is, explaining that a lot has changed in the past six months.
She tells Dr. Naadiah about being in a relationship with a man she loves, her family being closer than ever, and her career now taking off. Dr. Naadiah comments this is wonderful, and Erica describes how she is in a different place than she was when she started therapy.
Erica says she feels as though she is done with therapy, and Dr. Naadiah wonders whether her decision has nothing to do with Dr. Tom quitting. Frustrated, Erica tells her she's done and asks why she has to has to keep answering Dr. Naadiah's questions.
Dr. Naadiah explains she doesn't and, that if Erica really feels like she wants to quit, she is free to go. Pleased to hear this, Erica turns to leave, but stops in her tracks when Dr. Naadiah adds that she first must pay her debt.
Confused, she turns back around, and Dr. Naadiah tells her it is time to settle her accounts right now. Suddenly, Erica finds herself transported back in time - standing up on a bar, where she is implored to dance as she catches a pink bra thrown her way. Shocked, she ends up falling off the bar - landing in a watching guy's arms.
Afterwards, she is confronted by her angry boss, Lily, who wonders what has gotten into Erica, who she says is one of their best dancers. Erica tries to stammer a reply, and Lily tells her she should fire her - considering how many other girls would love her job.
Erica insists she needs the job and explains she is just having an off night. Lily calms down and understands, but warns Erica that people come to see her dance, not break her neck. She instructs Erica to go and do the rounds.
She does so, collecting bottles from the edge of the pool table where a disguised Dr. Naadiah is playing. She deliberately knocks the cue ball off the table, and Erica picks it up to hand it back to her.
She thanks her and Erica, recognising who it is, rages that she's going to kill her. Dr. Naadiah jokes that Erica's list of regrets is already long enough without adding another one to it.
They head into the washroom to talk and Erica asks what she's doing and that she doesn't even know what year it is. Dr. Naadiah explains that it's the summer of 1998, but Erica reminds her that she has quit.
Dr. Naadiah tells her she's not done, and questions whether Erica really thought that, for everything she has been given, she wouldn't have to give something back. Erica accepts, and asks what she has to do. Dr. Naadiah says she was helped and now Erica must help someone else in return.
Erica asks who she is supposed to help, and Dr. Naadiah replies "who indeed" before leaving Erica alone, confused.
Back behind the bar, Erica is trying to remember how to mix a Harvey Wallbanger for a customer when she spots a man she recognises down at the other end of the bar - Dr. Tom. She quickly finishes off making the customer's drink.
She asks Lily if the customer she has served said anything to her - asking about Erica or telling her something she needs to know. Lily jokes that the only thing she needs to know is he likes to drink expensive scotch, and then wonders whether an odd-acting Erica has been hit on the head.
Erica takes a break and approaches the table where sitting down is a young and more dishevelled looking Dr. Tom. She calls his name and he turns to her, looking confused. She begins to explain how glad she is to have found him and, referring to him as Dr. Tom again, admits that she knows he doesn't want to see her.
However, he interrupts her and explains to a confused Erica that, although his name is Tom, he's not a Doctor, and wonders whether the title is supposed to be some kind of flattering honorific like 'chief' or 'sir'.
He finishes off his drink and informs her he'd like another one, before admitting that, seeing as she isn't wearing her name tag, he doesn't know what she's called. Still confused, she tells him Erica Strange, and Tom comments on her interesting surname.
She takes the opportunity to enquire whether 'Tom' is all he goes by, but he replies by simply asking again for another drink. Instead, Erica sits down opposite him, and Tom groans - telling her that, although flattered, he's not the 'daddy type' she may be looking for.
Appalled by this suggestion, Erica explains she's not and is just providing superior customer service. Tom is relieved to hear this, commenting that Erica is barely older than his daughter. She is surprised by this disclosure, and he wonders why she finds it interesting that he has a daughter.
Erica bluffs that she might know her, and asks him what her name is. Tom asks again for another drink and Erica relents, apologising if he thought she was prying - which he confirms he did.
She says customers usually want to talk, but Tom suggests they come for the view - her shaking everything God gave her for tips. Erica confirms she is doing it to pay for grad school, and Tom comments that with brains and beauty she must be the complete package.
Erica jokes that, with a masters in English, she'll be the most well-read customer service rep he'll ever meet. He chuckles, and quotes to her: "I seldom end up where I wanted to go, but almost always end up where I need to be."
She is taking this in when Lily comes up and thrusts a cowgirl hat into her arms and telling her it's "showtime." Erica tells Tom she's has to go and strut her stuff, but asks him to promise not to go anywhere as she'll be right back.
He replies that he will, as long as she promises to bring him his scotch. Erica suggests a coffee instead and Tom threatens that he will go next door if that's the case.
She tells him she will make his drink a double if he stays and he agrees. Before she returns to the bar though, he informs her that his surname is "Wexlar."
Erica does her provocative dance on the bar, with Tom watching on, unimpressed. Afterwards, she returns to him, carrying a tray with a glass of scotch for them each. Erica informs him that she is on a break and he has her for a full 15 minutes.
Sitting down to rejoin him, she wonders whether his wife minds him spending all night alone in a bar. He shows her his left hand minus a wedding ring, asking if it looks like he's married. Erica tells him she assumed so considering he has a daughter.
Tom replies that you don't have to have a wife to have a daughter. Erica is determined that he answer the question, but he tells her that his daughter has a mother and she should leave it at that.
He then suggests that she takes a turn in the hot seat, and Erica agrees, telling him he can ask her anything he wants. Tom wonders whether her parents mind her working at the bar, but Erica points out that she isn't stripping.
Tom admits that he knows she needs the money, but she could earn cash in a million other ways. He tells her that he wouldn't allow her to work at the bar, and Erica, surprised by his attitude, replies that it's a good thing that Tom isn't her dad.
He insists that she shouldn't have to make money by teasing horny frat boys, but Erica responds that he is here, and wonders what that says about him. Tom then opens up his wallet and passes a large amount of money to Erica, explaining they are for the drinks and tips.
Erica tells him she can't accept so much, but he insists she does so she can quit her job and find another one. He concludes that she needs the money more than he does.
Then, the guy who caught Erica when she fell off the bar, approaches, and gives her back her cowgirl hat. He asks her what she's doing after her shift and Erica, obviously not interested in him, says she already has plans that involve a lot of sleep.
He tells her he likes to sleep, too, but Tom then interjects and tells him that Erica has made it plainly clear that she's not interested. The guy tells Tom to chill and explains that nobody is trying to "cockblock" him.
Erica doesn't take kindly to this comment and Tom responds angrily. The guy suggests he calms down and, pointing to the money Tom tried to give to Erica, mocks that, unlike Tom, he doesn't need to pay to score with a girl.
Tom stands up and confronts the guy, asking if he thinks it's funny to treat women like a piece of meat and suggesting he hasn't been taught how to respect them. He then launches himself at the guy, and knocks him onto the floor.
He then kicks him back onto the floor and punches him in the face a couple of times. Erica screams for him to stop, but Tom continues his attack, even throwing aside another guy who attempts to step in and stop him.
Tom then repeatedly kicks the guy in the stomach until two bouncers drag him away and throw him out of the club. Erica follows them, screaming for them to let go of Tom. Outside, she tries to see if he's OK but he shouts for her to go back inside, stay away, and leave him alone. He then walks away, leaving Erica stunned.
Back inside the bar, Erica is shocked to see a young Julianne dancing on the bar and taking off her bra. She then approaches Dr. Naadiah, and informs her she has found the guy she is supposed to help but doesn't know how to.
She says she doesn't have the training and isn't a therapist, but Dr. Naadiah suggests somebody must help him and Erica agrees that the Dr. Tom she knows in the present is not like that. She swears that Tom enjoyed hurting the guy - and could see it in his eyes.
Erica insists that she can't help him and wouldn't even know where to begin, but Dr. Naadiah suggests she hasn't tried very hard and asks Erica if she thinks Dr. Tom always knew how to help her. Erica repeats again that she's not a therapist, but Dr. Naadiah responds that she is resourceful and will think of something, before leaving.
However, as Dr. Naadiah leaves, she is confronted in a hallway by an angry Dr. Tom, who tells her she had no right. She replies that he walked away from his responsibilities to Erica and that her therapy is no longer his call or business.
Dr. Tom argues that she has taken Erica back into his past, and that makes it his business. She asks him why he cares after saying he was done. Dr. Naadiah questions why he cares what Erica does and doesn't know and why is he paying any attention to her at all. She then goes, leaving him to wonder.
Later that evening, Erica is back in her apartment searching for information about "Tom Wexlar" online and making notes on a pad of paper.
The next morning, she pays a visit to his place of work - Vadis - where she tries to gain access to Tom only to find an unhelpful secretary. She then accosts a man, and tells him she is a friend of Tom's daughter and is looking for him.
The man is surprised she is a friend of "Sarah's" and asks Erica if she knows where she is, before commenting that Sarah should be ashamed of herself. Erica tries, but fails, to persuade him to allow her to see Tom, and he instructs her to leave.
Frustrated, Erica does so, and presses the button for the elevator. However, when the doors open they reveal Dr. Naadiah's office, and Erica enters bemoaning the fact she has tried, but failed, to find Tom - and therefore can't help him.
She sits down, saying she knows nothing about Tom, but Dr. Naadiah disagrees, and tells Erica she knows more about him than she did even a day ago.
Erica begins to describe his anger management problem, his last name being Wexlar, his daughter being called Sarah, and the fact he was fired from his well-paid job. She then stops and concludes that Tom is like her, and Dr. Naadiah asks how.
She explains that, on the first day Dr. Tom found her, her life was a disaster, and compares it to the man she met in the bar who had hit rock bottom. Erica then leans forward in her chair and proclaims that Dr. Tom was a patient too.
Dr. Naadiah doesn't respond, but gets up out of her chair and asks Erica to follow her. Erica asks where they are going, and she explains they are going to see Dr. Tom.
Erica wonders what the point of her running around the city looking for him was if Dr. Naadiah could have just taken her to him. Dr. Naadiah explains that it was for context for what she is about see.
They stand in front of some blue and white curtains, which blow in the wind, and Erica steps outside to find herself on top of a building in the city. She is then shocked to spot Tom in the distance - sitting on the edge and looking down.
She begins to run towards him but then Dr. Tom steps in her way and commands her to stop, telling her that this is not her problem. Erica responds, telling him Dr. Naadiah is her therapist now and that she seems to think it is.
He pleads with her to leave it alone and tells Erica he doesn't want her to talk to him. Erica, welling up, says she has told Dr. Tom everything about her and exposed herself to him. She wonders how the Dr. Tom she knows could ever be the Tom she's met.
Erica tells Dr. Tom her purpose is to help the man who looks like he is about to throw himself off the building, but he insists that she can't help him. She concedes that, although that may be the case, she is going to try.
She runs up to Tom, who is surprised to hear her call his name. He asks how she has managed to get up to see him. Erica insists it doesn't matter, but he asks her who she is and what is going on.
Erica suggests he should think of her as a guardian angel type, but he laughs at this idea, asking where she has been for the last couple of years. Using the same quote he used to her when they first met, Erica tells Tom: "In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity."
He identifies it as a quote he uses and asks again who Erica is and why she has said that. She explains that it always reminds her there is a way out. Tom shakes his head, saying he doesn't think there is for him.
Erica explains that she knows how that feels and that is why she is here. She begs him not to jump, as it is not going to make anything better. Tom, starting to cry, tells her he can't live like he is anymore and that he can't see any opportunity.
She thinks for a bit and then replies that she is his opportunity, and asks him to go with her and find a better way to fix whatever there is that's wrong.
Just then, Erica hears Ethan's voice, calling her name, and she turns around. As she does, Tom jumps off the building, and Erica turns back around and screams at this sight. However, she suddenly finds herself back in the restaurant in the present day with the phone in her hand and Ethan behind her.
He asks her if she's OK and enquires what Dr. Naadiah wanted and how she knew where Erica was. She suggests that Meeri must have told her and that she won't be answering her phone anymore, and they head back to their table.
Later that evening, back in Erica's apartment, Ethan is asleep on the couch as she furiously searches online for information about Tom Wexlar. She struggles to hold back the tears as she reads the results on the search engine.
She clicks on one of the articles she finds - describing how Tom had been talked down from committing suicide off the top of the Vadis Tower. Erica can't understand what she's reading, and wipes the tears away from her eyes before standing up and pacing around, holding her head in her hands.
Suddenly, she stops, and looks to the front door of her apartment. She slowly approaches it, feeling a compulsion to open it. Leaning her head against the door and closing her eyes, she slowly turns the knob, hoping to reveal what she wants.
She opens the door to see Dr. Tom, standing in his office, looking out of the window. She enters and he turns around and they greet one another. He invites Erica to sit down, but she tells him that she saw him jump and he is supposed to be dead.
Dr. Tom explains that it's more complicated than that, but that he hasn't brought her to him to talk about that. He tells Erica he needs to apologise for breaking her trust, losing it like he did, and hurting her.
Emotional, Erica tells him that it's OK and motions to go to him, but Dr. Tom insists that it's not OK, and now she knows that it's not the first time he has lost his temper. He walks back towards the window and explains that he thought he was "done with all that."
He concedes that was obviously not the case and, as a result, decided that it was not in Erica's best interest to have him as a therapist. She asks what happened to him, and he agrees that back in 1998 he was angry.
Erica describes him as being bitter and sad - so different to how he is now, and asks Dr. Tom why. He approaches her and then, suddenly, then are both transported back in time to the city centre of Toronto.
She asks what year it is, and he explains it's 1996 and beckons her to follow him so he can show her something. He points in the distance to a group of teenagers hanging out, telling Erica that the girl there is his daughter, Sarah.
Dr. Tom explains to Erica how, when she was young, they were inseparable. However, things between her mother and him had become complicated and he had said and done things which he couldn't unsay or undo.
He describes how, after a while, Sarah had stopped coming home, but he always knew where he could find her. We then see Tom from 1996 approaching Sarah, where they engage in an argument, ending in her telling him she's never coming home.
As Dr. Tom and Erica watch, he says that this was one of many fights he and Sarah had, but he had said things he regretted on this occasion and tells her this was the last time he saw his daughter.
He explains how he didn't, and still doesn't, know whether Sarah is dead or alive and it led to him becoming more and more angry until he could feel nothing else and, one day, deciding that he was done. Erica insists that he doesn't need to explain himself to her.
However, Dr. Tom replies that he does, as he needs her to understand that when she went back and saved Leo that she did the one thing he wishes he would have done.
He explains how it triggered something inside of him and all his old feelings and things he thought he was done with had come rushing back - and he was unable to control them or himself.
Dr. Tom says a therapist can't act like that, and tells Erica that Dr. Naadiah will be a better fit for her.
Erica looks upset at this idea, and tells him that her therapy has been the craziest and most intense experience that she has ever had, but points out that he never lets her run away. Dr. Tom reminds her she made a committment and Erica responds that so did he.
She says that he promised to help her and, smiling, tells him he did. Erica concedes that while everything he has just said sounds like it makes sense, she still knows that him quitting is not the right thing.
Dr. Tom insists that he's not quitting, but just wants her to have the best therapist. Erica says that that person is him and that she doesn't care that he isn't perfect.
She understands that he thought, wrongly, that he was done making mistakes and being overwhelmed by the past and therefore needed to quit. However, she dismisses the notion of anybody ever being "done," maybe not even when they're dead.
Erica tells him she isn't done, and still has a list of regrets a mile long. She then assures him: "The one regret I don't have, Dr. Tom, is you." He smiles at these words, turns away, and then turns back to face her.
"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear," he quotes to her, suggesting in this instance that the teacher is Erica. She smiles and asks if they're good, which he confirms.
Erica sighs, expressing her relief and commenting that Dr. Naadiah's office isn't the warmest place she's ever been.
She jokes that even a throw rug or a space heater would help, and Dr. Tom tells her he'll mention it. They both nod at one another and Erica starts to walk away before turning and asking Dr. Tom if he's alive, dead, or an angel.
"For every thing there is a season and a time," he quotes to her, explaining that the time for that question has not yet come. Erica accepts this and continues to leave. She sighs again and finds herself transported back to the present day.
She is back in her apartment, where Ethan remains sleeping on the couch. Erica narrates as she goes over to stroke Ethan's hair.
"Growth is painful. Change is hard. And there are days when you wish it would just stop. Wouldn't it be great to just know, to feel like you've finally figured it all out, to just be done?
"It's the hardest and most wonderful thing about being alive. That, no matter how much you learn, grow, or change, you're never done."
Later that evening, Erica makes her way to Goblins for a coffee. She is greeted by the same barista from the morning, who asks her if the latte helped. Erica tells him it did and he asks if he can get her another one. She orders a decaf with vanilla syrup.
The barista asks his boss, Dave, where the vanilla syrup is and is told to look in the storage cupboard. He tells Erica to wait a sec, and Erica tries to tell him not to worry after all, but he pushes the door to the storage cupboard.
As he does, inside, Erica sees a garden with a man sitting behind a desk, reading. The barista walks in and the door closes. Stunned, Erica walks around to the cupboard and opens the door herself - only to find the shelves as normal.
Erica closes the door and tries to contemplate what she has just witnessed.
Episode Guide
Erica is still in Dr. Naadiah's office, trying to digest what she has just been told. She asks what Naadiah is talking about. Naadiah tries to calm her, suggesting she sits down and that she knows she has been through a lot. Erica replies that she doesn't.
She tells Naadiah that she isn't her doctor and requests to speak with Dr. Tom. Naadiah tells her she can't, and Erica asks why she can't and where he is. Naadiah reminds Erica that Dr. Tom told her that her therapy is about her and her only.
However, Erica points out that they made a commitment to one another, together. Naadiah disagrees though, and says she is now here to help Erica honour her commitment, pointing out she isn't finished with her list or therapy.
Erica wonders if Dr. Tom is being punished for losing his temper, and admits that it was her fault too. She says that she broke her promise and he had a reason to be upset. Naadiah insists that no-one is punishing Dr. Tom though.
Upset, Erica demands to know why she can't see him, and Naadiah reluctantly explains that Dr. Tom has decided to quit and that Erica can't see him as he doesn't want to see her. Erica turns away at this revelation and, finding a door, walks through it.
She finds herself entering her apartment via her front door. She tries to compose herself, but then Naadiah opens the door and follows her in. Erica is surprised to see her - reminding her that Ethan is asleep in the next room.
Naadiah says that their conversation isn't over, but Erica is adamant that it is. She tells Naadiah that she is sure she is very qualified but tells her it has nothing to do with her. Erica reiterates that her commitment was to Dr. Tom and that if he has quit, so will she.
Realising she is getting nowhere, Naadiah agrees to go, telling Erica she will give her some time. Erica is left in her apartment, trying to come to terms with everything.
Erica and Ethan are walking through the city streets and she narrates:
"How do you know when you're done? When it's time to move on? Sometimes, the decision is impulsive. Other times you think it through but, no matter how we decide we're ready, the truth remains that the past is a hard thing to let go of."
Ethan asks her if she has plans for dinner and lets her know he's made reservations at Monsoon. Erica is impressed and asks why they are going somewhere so fancy. Ethan replies that she deserves it after going through a lot in the last few days.
Just then, a man passing them on the sidewalk bumps into Erica - spilling the coffee she was holding onto the floor. He apologises profusely and hands Erica some money for her and Ethan to get another drink - pointing to a "great" coffee house just across the road.
They head to the coffee house, called Goblins, and Erica orders two small lattes. She leans on the counter and sighs and the barista, a young guy, asks her if everything is OK. Erica replies that she's fine, but explains about being bumped into and her coffee being spilled all over the street.
Ethan then joins Erica and, noticing there's something up with her, says she has been on edge all morning and asks what's bothering her. Erica bluffs that she is nervous about work, explaining that Julianne is going to be announcing who will get what new book titles.
He assures her that she will get something great, joking that, albeit not at first, Julianne now loves her. The barista then returns with their lattes, telling Erica they're on the house and advising her not to let anyone else bump into her.
Erica arrives at River Rock and is greeted by an excited Brent who begins to follow her around. She excuses herself to go to the washroom but, before she can enter, he blocks her path and tells Erica he has some information.
She wonders if it can wait, but Brent describes how he hacked into Julianne's computer and has seen the list of new books. Erica's interest captured, Brent explains that there are four new books - including an as yet untitled sex book.
Erica is surprised, and Brent says he got a tingly feeling and his jaw hit the floor when he saw it. She assures him that she's sure he is going to get it, with Brent twice commenting that he has "seniority." He tells Erica that, as the "master of libido," he feels born to edit the book.
Meeri then interrupts and informs them that they're already five minutes late for the meeting and Erica and Brent rush into the meeting room and apologise for their tardiness. Julianne quotes to them from The Secret of Now, with its author, Thomas Friedkin, explaining that Secret 89 reads "always be on time."
Julianne then starts the meeting, welcoming Friedkin, who she explains has come on board to help with their other self-help projects as well as writing his new book - The Mystery of Tomorrow.
He goes to sit down next to Erica, assuring them that he hasn't come to "bury Caesar, but to praise him" and that they shouldn't "get their knickers in a knot," confirming to a clearly unimpressed Erica that he has just said "knickers."
Julianne continues, telling them River Rock will be stepping outside of the box and traipsing down a very different road over the coming year, with Friedkin confirming their biggest title will be a sex book. Brent and Erica try to feign surprise.
She says that the book will revolutionise the sex help industry and, to everyone's surprise, announces that Erica will be the "lucky editor" to lead them through their sexual revolution. Brent is stunned at this revelation, and Erica can't believe it herself.
Julianne tells her that Erica deserves a lot of the credit for Stahl's book being put to bed in record time and, with the first few chapters of The None being so impressive, she and Galvin had concluded Erica deserved this shot. She then tells Brent he will be working on a book about origami.
After the meeting, Brent is quick to leave and Erica tries to catch him. He pretends to be power walking as Erica attempts to apologise to him, but he tells her he's fine and that it's a business.
He points to the success of Erica's last book compared to his and insists he can deal with it. Brent then leaves, although he is clearly pained when overhearing Meeri congratulate Erica.
Meanwhile, on top of a building in the city, Dr. Tom is gazing into the distance, deep in thought. Naadiah then approaches him and he tells her that he's not going to change his mind. She informs him of Erica's decision to quit, telling Dr. Tom she wants him or she's done.
He replies that it is just an initial reaction, and that Erica will come around. Naadiah wonders what will happen if she doesn't, and Dr. Tom states that if she doesn't it is her choice, before restating that he's made his.
Naadiah stands beside him, commenting that this is the Tom she remembers. He agrees with her, saying he's not cut out to be Erica's or anybody else's doctor. Naadiah suggests that Erica doesn't see it that way, but Dr. Tom reminds her that he grabbed Erica.
He describes how he got so angry he could feel it, and tells Naadiah it was just like "before" - not being able to think straight or stop himself. Dr. Tom concludes that Erica needs someone else, someone more together, and he agrees when Naadiah suggests someone like her.
She asks him why it feels like he is running away, he rejects this idea though, saying he has thought things through and that it is the right choice, adding "for Erica."
"Fear is the mind killer," Naadiah quotes at him. He tells her not to, and she agrees that it is annoying, before leaving him alone.
That evening, Erica and Ethan are at Monsoon for dinner, and she explains to him her surprise at being chosen over Brent to edit the sex book. Erica says she feels terrible, but Ethan tells her not to feel guilty and that tonight is about how great things are.
Erica agrees, describing how much has changed in the last six months and that she feels a million miles away from where she was when he first moved to Toronto. Ethan raises his glass, proposing a toast to her new project, and Erica adds to a fresh start, leaving the past behind, and looking ahead.
Just then, her cell phone rings and Ethan retrieves it for her from her purse. He notices that Dr. Naadiah is calling her, and asks Erica who she is. Erica is shocked, and tells him it is just work.
She tries to change the conversation onto what to eat, but a waiter then comes over and confirms that she is Erica Strange. He then informs her that Dr. Naadiah has called the restaurant and is on the phone for her. Ethan is surprised that she has called the restaurant, and Erica excuses herself to take care of the call.
Erica takes the phone and walks a safe distance away from the table before speaking. Dr. Naadiah apologises for the interruption, but insists that they need to talk. Erica, still walking, says they have nothing to talk about.
However, as she reminds her that she has quit, Erica suddenly finds herself passing straight through a wall and into Dr. Naadiah's office. Erica is stunned, but Dr. Naadiah tells her she's concerned she's making an impulsive decision.
Erica suggests that Dr. Naadiah doesn't know her at all, but she replies that she just wants Erica to think it through and ensure this is really what she wants. She is adamant that it is, explaining that a lot has changed in the past six months.
She tells Dr. Naadiah about being in a relationship with a man she loves, her family being closer than ever, and her career now taking off. Dr. Naadiah comments this is wonderful, and Erica describes how she is in a different place than she was when she started therapy.
Erica says she feels as though she is done with therapy, and Dr. Naadiah wonders whether her decision has nothing to do with Dr. Tom quitting. Frustrated, Erica tells her she's done and asks why she has to has to keep answering Dr. Naadiah's questions.
Dr. Naadiah explains she doesn't and, that if Erica really feels like she wants to quit, she is free to go. Pleased to hear this, Erica turns to leave, but stops in her tracks when Dr. Naadiah adds that she first must pay her debt.
Confused, she turns back around, and Dr. Naadiah tells her it is time to settle her accounts right now. Suddenly, Erica finds herself transported back in time - standing up on a bar, where she is implored to dance as she catches a pink bra thrown her way. Shocked, she ends up falling off the bar - landing in a watching guy's arms.
Afterwards, she is confronted by her angry boss, Lily, who wonders what has gotten into Erica, who she says is one of their best dancers. Erica tries to stammer a reply, and Lily tells her she should fire her - considering how many other girls would love her job.
Erica insists she needs the job and explains she is just having an off night. Lily calms down and understands, but warns Erica that people come to see her dance, not break her neck. She instructs Erica to go and do the rounds.
She does so, collecting bottles from the edge of the pool table where a disguised Dr. Naadiah is playing. She deliberately knocks the cue ball off the table, and Erica picks it up to hand it back to her.
She thanks her and Erica, recognising who it is, rages that she's going to kill her. Dr. Naadiah jokes that Erica's list of regrets is already long enough without adding another one to it.
They head into the washroom to talk and Erica asks what she's doing and that she doesn't even know what year it is. Dr. Naadiah explains that it's the summer of 1998, but Erica reminds her that she has quit.
Dr. Naadiah tells her she's not done, and questions whether Erica really thought that, for everything she has been given, she wouldn't have to give something back. Erica accepts, and asks what she has to do. Dr. Naadiah says she was helped and now Erica must help someone else in return.
Erica asks who she is supposed to help, and Dr. Naadiah replies "who indeed" before leaving Erica alone, confused.
Back behind the bar, Erica is trying to remember how to mix a Harvey Wallbanger for a customer when she spots a man she recognises down at the other end of the bar - Dr. Tom. She quickly finishes off making the customer's drink.
She asks Lily if the customer she has served said anything to her - asking about Erica or telling her something she needs to know. Lily jokes that the only thing she needs to know is he likes to drink expensive scotch, and then wonders whether an odd-acting Erica has been hit on the head.
Erica takes a break and approaches the table where sitting down is a young and more dishevelled looking Dr. Tom. She calls his name and he turns to her, looking confused. She begins to explain how glad she is to have found him and, referring to him as Dr. Tom again, admits that she knows he doesn't want to see her.
However, he interrupts her and explains to a confused Erica that, although his name is Tom, he's not a Doctor, and wonders whether the title is supposed to be some kind of flattering honorific like 'chief' or 'sir'.
He finishes off his drink and informs her he'd like another one, before admitting that, seeing as she isn't wearing her name tag, he doesn't know what she's called. Still confused, she tells him Erica Strange, and Tom comments on her interesting surname.
She takes the opportunity to enquire whether 'Tom' is all he goes by, but he replies by simply asking again for another drink. Instead, Erica sits down opposite him, and Tom groans - telling her that, although flattered, he's not the 'daddy type' she may be looking for.
Appalled by this suggestion, Erica explains she's not and is just providing superior customer service. Tom is relieved to hear this, commenting that Erica is barely older than his daughter. She is surprised by this disclosure, and he wonders why she finds it interesting that he has a daughter.
Erica bluffs that she might know her, and asks him what her name is. Tom asks again for another drink and Erica relents, apologising if he thought she was prying - which he confirms he did.
She says customers usually want to talk, but Tom suggests they come for the view - her shaking everything God gave her for tips. Erica confirms she is doing it to pay for grad school, and Tom comments that with brains and beauty she must be the complete package.
Erica jokes that, with a masters in English, she'll be the most well-read customer service rep he'll ever meet. He chuckles, and quotes to her: "I seldom end up where I wanted to go, but almost always end up where I need to be."
She is taking this in when Lily comes up and thrusts a cowgirl hat into her arms and telling her it's "showtime." Erica tells Tom she's has to go and strut her stuff, but asks him to promise not to go anywhere as she'll be right back.
He replies that he will, as long as she promises to bring him his scotch. Erica suggests a coffee instead and Tom threatens that he will go next door if that's the case.
She tells him she will make his drink a double if he stays and he agrees. Before she returns to the bar though, he informs her that his surname is "Wexlar."
Erica does her provocative dance on the bar, with Tom watching on, unimpressed. Afterwards, she returns to him, carrying a tray with a glass of scotch for them each. Erica informs him that she is on a break and he has her for a full 15 minutes.
Sitting down to rejoin him, she wonders whether his wife minds him spending all night alone in a bar. He shows her his left hand minus a wedding ring, asking if it looks like he's married. Erica tells him she assumed so considering he has a daughter.
Tom replies that you don't have to have a wife to have a daughter. Erica is determined that he answer the question, but he tells her that his daughter has a mother and she should leave it at that.
He then suggests that she takes a turn in the hot seat, and Erica agrees, telling him he can ask her anything he wants. Tom wonders whether her parents mind her working at the bar, but Erica points out that she isn't stripping.
Tom admits that he knows she needs the money, but she could earn cash in a million other ways. He tells her that he wouldn't allow her to work at the bar, and Erica, surprised by his attitude, replies that it's a good thing that Tom isn't her dad.
He insists that she shouldn't have to make money by teasing horny frat boys, but Erica responds that he is here, and wonders what that says about him. Tom then opens up his wallet and passes a large amount of money to Erica, explaining they are for the drinks and tips.
Erica tells him she can't accept so much, but he insists she does so she can quit her job and find another one. He concludes that she needs the money more than he does.
Then, the guy who caught Erica when she fell off the bar, approaches, and gives her back her cowgirl hat. He asks her what she's doing after her shift and Erica, obviously not interested in him, says she already has plans that involve a lot of sleep.
He tells her he likes to sleep, too, but Tom then interjects and tells him that Erica has made it plainly clear that she's not interested. The guy tells Tom to chill and explains that nobody is trying to "cockblock" him.
Erica doesn't take kindly to this comment and Tom responds angrily. The guy suggests he calms down and, pointing to the money Tom tried to give to Erica, mocks that, unlike Tom, he doesn't need to pay to score with a girl.
Tom stands up and confronts the guy, asking if he thinks it's funny to treat women like a piece of meat and suggesting he hasn't been taught how to respect them. He then launches himself at the guy, and knocks him onto the floor.
He then kicks him back onto the floor and punches him in the face a couple of times. Erica screams for him to stop, but Tom continues his attack, even throwing aside another guy who attempts to step in and stop him.
Tom then repeatedly kicks the guy in the stomach until two bouncers drag him away and throw him out of the club. Erica follows them, screaming for them to let go of Tom. Outside, she tries to see if he's OK but he shouts for her to go back inside, stay away, and leave him alone. He then walks away, leaving Erica stunned.
Back inside the bar, Erica is shocked to see a young Julianne dancing on the bar and taking off her bra. She then approaches Dr. Naadiah, and informs her she has found the guy she is supposed to help but doesn't know how to.
She says she doesn't have the training and isn't a therapist, but Dr. Naadiah suggests somebody must help him and Erica agrees that the Dr. Tom she knows in the present is not like that. She swears that Tom enjoyed hurting the guy - and could see it in his eyes.
Erica insists that she can't help him and wouldn't even know where to begin, but Dr. Naadiah suggests she hasn't tried very hard and asks Erica if she thinks Dr. Tom always knew how to help her. Erica repeats again that she's not a therapist, but Dr. Naadiah responds that she is resourceful and will think of something, before leaving.
However, as Dr. Naadiah leaves, she is confronted in a hallway by an angry Dr. Tom, who tells her she had no right. She replies that he walked away from his responsibilities to Erica and that her therapy is no longer his call or business.
Dr. Tom argues that she has taken Erica back into his past, and that makes it his business. She asks him why he cares after saying he was done. Dr. Naadiah questions why he cares what Erica does and doesn't know and why is he paying any attention to her at all. She then goes, leaving him to wonder.
Later that evening, Erica is back in her apartment searching for information about "Tom Wexlar" online and making notes on a pad of paper.
The next morning, she pays a visit to his place of work - Vadis - where she tries to gain access to Tom only to find an unhelpful secretary. She then accosts a man, and tells him she is a friend of Tom's daughter and is looking for him.
The man is surprised she is a friend of "Sarah's" and asks Erica if she knows where she is, before commenting that Sarah should be ashamed of herself. Erica tries, but fails, to persuade him to allow her to see Tom, and he instructs her to leave.
Frustrated, Erica does so, and presses the button for the elevator. However, when the doors open they reveal Dr. Naadiah's office, and Erica enters bemoaning the fact she has tried, but failed, to find Tom - and therefore can't help him.
She sits down, saying she knows nothing about Tom, but Dr. Naadiah disagrees, and tells Erica she knows more about him than she did even a day ago.
Erica begins to describe his anger management problem, his last name being Wexlar, his daughter being called Sarah, and the fact he was fired from his well-paid job. She then stops and concludes that Tom is like her, and Dr. Naadiah asks how.
She explains that, on the first day Dr. Tom found her, her life was a disaster, and compares it to the man she met in the bar who had hit rock bottom. Erica then leans forward in her chair and proclaims that Dr. Tom was a patient too.
Dr. Naadiah doesn't respond, but gets up out of her chair and asks Erica to follow her. Erica asks where they are going, and she explains they are going to see Dr. Tom.
Erica wonders what the point of her running around the city looking for him was if Dr. Naadiah could have just taken her to him. Dr. Naadiah explains that it was for context for what she is about see.
They stand in front of some blue and white curtains, which blow in the wind, and Erica steps outside to find herself on top of a building in the city. She is then shocked to spot Tom in the distance - sitting on the edge and looking down.
She begins to run towards him but then Dr. Tom steps in her way and commands her to stop, telling her that this is not her problem. Erica responds, telling him Dr. Naadiah is her therapist now and that she seems to think it is.
He pleads with her to leave it alone and tells Erica he doesn't want her to talk to him. Erica, welling up, says she has told Dr. Tom everything about her and exposed herself to him. She wonders how the Dr. Tom she knows could ever be the Tom she's met.
Erica tells Dr. Tom her purpose is to help the man who looks like he is about to throw himself off the building, but he insists that she can't help him. She concedes that, although that may be the case, she is going to try.
She runs up to Tom, who is surprised to hear her call his name. He asks how she has managed to get up to see him. Erica insists it doesn't matter, but he asks her who she is and what is going on.
Erica suggests he should think of her as a guardian angel type, but he laughs at this idea, asking where she has been for the last couple of years. Using the same quote he used to her when they first met, Erica tells Tom: "In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity."
He identifies it as a quote he uses and asks again who Erica is and why she has said that. She explains that it always reminds her there is a way out. Tom shakes his head, saying he doesn't think there is for him.
Erica explains that she knows how that feels and that is why she is here. She begs him not to jump, as it is not going to make anything better. Tom, starting to cry, tells her he can't live like he is anymore and that he can't see any opportunity.
She thinks for a bit and then replies that she is his opportunity, and asks him to go with her and find a better way to fix whatever there is that's wrong.
Just then, Erica hears Ethan's voice, calling her name, and she turns around. As she does, Tom jumps off the building, and Erica turns back around and screams at this sight. However, she suddenly finds herself back in the restaurant in the present day with the phone in her hand and Ethan behind her.
He asks her if she's OK and enquires what Dr. Naadiah wanted and how she knew where Erica was. She suggests that Meeri must have told her and that she won't be answering her phone anymore, and they head back to their table.
Later that evening, back in Erica's apartment, Ethan is asleep on the couch as she furiously searches online for information about Tom Wexlar. She struggles to hold back the tears as she reads the results on the search engine.
She clicks on one of the articles she finds - describing how Tom had been talked down from committing suicide off the top of the Vadis Tower. Erica can't understand what she's reading, and wipes the tears away from her eyes before standing up and pacing around, holding her head in her hands.
Suddenly, she stops, and looks to the front door of her apartment. She slowly approaches it, feeling a compulsion to open it. Leaning her head against the door and closing her eyes, she slowly turns the knob, hoping to reveal what she wants.
She opens the door to see Dr. Tom, standing in his office, looking out of the window. She enters and he turns around and they greet one another. He invites Erica to sit down, but she tells him that she saw him jump and he is supposed to be dead.
Dr. Tom explains that it's more complicated than that, but that he hasn't brought her to him to talk about that. He tells Erica he needs to apologise for breaking her trust, losing it like he did, and hurting her.
Emotional, Erica tells him that it's OK and motions to go to him, but Dr. Tom insists that it's not OK, and now she knows that it's not the first time he has lost his temper. He walks back towards the window and explains that he thought he was "done with all that."
He concedes that was obviously not the case and, as a result, decided that it was not in Erica's best interest to have him as a therapist. She asks what happened to him, and he agrees that back in 1998 he was angry.
Erica describes him as being bitter and sad - so different to how he is now, and asks Dr. Tom why. He approaches her and then, suddenly, then are both transported back in time to the city centre of Toronto.
She asks what year it is, and he explains it's 1996 and beckons her to follow him so he can show her something. He points in the distance to a group of teenagers hanging out, telling Erica that the girl there is his daughter, Sarah.
Dr. Tom explains to Erica how, when she was young, they were inseparable. However, things between her mother and him had become complicated and he had said and done things which he couldn't unsay or undo.
He describes how, after a while, Sarah had stopped coming home, but he always knew where he could find her. We then see Tom from 1996 approaching Sarah, where they engage in an argument, ending in her telling him she's never coming home.
As Dr. Tom and Erica watch, he says that this was one of many fights he and Sarah had, but he had said things he regretted on this occasion and tells her this was the last time he saw his daughter.
He explains how he didn't, and still doesn't, know whether Sarah is dead or alive and it led to him becoming more and more angry until he could feel nothing else and, one day, deciding that he was done. Erica insists that he doesn't need to explain himself to her.
However, Dr. Tom replies that he does, as he needs her to understand that when she went back and saved Leo that she did the one thing he wishes he would have done.
He explains how it triggered something inside of him and all his old feelings and things he thought he was done with had come rushing back - and he was unable to control them or himself.
Dr. Tom says a therapist can't act like that, and tells Erica that Dr. Naadiah will be a better fit for her.
Erica looks upset at this idea, and tells him that her therapy has been the craziest and most intense experience that she has ever had, but points out that he never lets her run away. Dr. Tom reminds her she made a committment and Erica responds that so did he.
She says that he promised to help her and, smiling, tells him he did. Erica concedes that while everything he has just said sounds like it makes sense, she still knows that him quitting is not the right thing.
Dr. Tom insists that he's not quitting, but just wants her to have the best therapist. Erica says that that person is him and that she doesn't care that he isn't perfect.
She understands that he thought, wrongly, that he was done making mistakes and being overwhelmed by the past and therefore needed to quit. However, she dismisses the notion of anybody ever being "done," maybe not even when they're dead.
Erica tells him she isn't done, and still has a list of regrets a mile long. She then assures him: "The one regret I don't have, Dr. Tom, is you." He smiles at these words, turns away, and then turns back to face her.
"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear," he quotes to her, suggesting in this instance that the teacher is Erica. She smiles and asks if they're good, which he confirms.
Erica sighs, expressing her relief and commenting that Dr. Naadiah's office isn't the warmest place she's ever been.
She jokes that even a throw rug or a space heater would help, and Dr. Tom tells her he'll mention it. They both nod at one another and Erica starts to walk away before turning and asking Dr. Tom if he's alive, dead, or an angel.
"For every thing there is a season and a time," he quotes to her, explaining that the time for that question has not yet come. Erica accepts this and continues to leave. She sighs again and finds herself transported back to the present day.
She is back in her apartment, where Ethan remains sleeping on the couch. Erica narrates as she goes over to stroke Ethan's hair.
"Growth is painful. Change is hard. And there are days when you wish it would just stop. Wouldn't it be great to just know, to feel like you've finally figured it all out, to just be done?
"It's the hardest and most wonderful thing about being alive. That, no matter how much you learn, grow, or change, you're never done."
Later that evening, Erica makes her way to Goblins for a coffee. She is greeted by the same barista from the morning, who asks her if the latte helped. Erica tells him it did and he asks if he can get her another one. She orders a decaf with vanilla syrup.
The barista asks his boss, Dave, where the vanilla syrup is and is told to look in the storage cupboard. He tells Erica to wait a sec, and Erica tries to tell him not to worry after all, but he pushes the door to the storage cupboard.
As he does, inside, Erica sees a garden with a man sitting behind a desk, reading. The barista walks in and the door closes. Stunned, Erica walks around to the cupboard and opens the door herself - only to find the shelves as normal.
Erica closes the door and tries to contemplate what she has just witnessed.
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