The Importance of Being Erica

Season 2, Episode 12: The Importance of Being Erica

Episode Guide

Still in the kitchen, Erica can't believe that Ethan doesn't think it's a good idea, but he insists she's being impulsive. Annoyed, she apologises for even bringing the subject up and takes the unopened bottle of champagne to put back in the fridge.

He reminds her that she's just lost her first job in publishing and is now saying she wants to run her own business. Erica says a lot of people start their own companies and Ethan adds that a lot of people fail at it.

She takes this to mean he doesn't think that she can do it, with Ethan not knowing what to say to this accusation. He tries to defend himself, and says he's just being honest and that Erica doesn't know anything about running a business.

Erica says she'll figure it out, and he wonders what will happen if she can't. Ethan advises her to be realistic and asks her if she honestly believes she's a hundred per cent ready. She instantly replies yes, although begins to doubt herself and admits she doesn't know.

He says she's getting ahead of herself and jumping in totally blind. Ethan describes this as too risky and Erica sighs deeply and sits down to consider.

She concedes that he may be right and he puts his hand on her shoulder - telling her that slow and steady wins the race. Ethan then hugs her, although Erica doesn't appear happy.

The next morning, Erica wakes up in bed and stretches out her arm to Ethan's side of the bed - finding him not there. She narrates:

"Have you ever woken up and had that feeling - like something isn't right? Like you've slept all night but aren't rested? Like there's a weight, a heaviness in your heart that you can't quite name?"

She then calls out for Ethan, who opens the bedroom door on hearing his name and asks her what she's doing up. Erica jokes that she's awake by habit and he sits down on the bed and kisses her.

He asks her how she's feeling and she tells him she's OK. Ethan doubts this, but she insists that everything he said the previous night made sense and that she's just processing it. He understands and they tell one another they love each other.

Erica says she'll see him in the evening, and he replies she definitely will as he leaves to go to work. She lies back down in bed.

"Have you ever woken up in your own bed and just felt lost?"

She closes her eyes and tries to go back to sleep, only for the phone to start ringing. Erica groans and reluctantly answers it to find Julianne on the other end. Walking through the streets with a coffee, she tells Erica to rise and shine.

Erica points out that it's not even 8am, with Julianne sarcastically replying that she can tell the time. She reminds her that their level two Ashtanga class starts in less than an hour, but Erica tells her no.

Julianne warns her that it's a slippery slope and one morning she will sit down to watch Oprah and two years later she'll be agoraphobic, morbidly obese, and sharing her apartment with 53 cats. She concludes this is a cautionary tale.

Erica is annoyed she won't allow her to sleep in, and Julianne states that not only is it their yoga class but also their first business meeting and she hangs up after telling Erica to get a move on.

Meanwhile, at Goblins, Jody meets with Kai and Travis where he tells them that their demo was righteous, although raw. He checks that they got the song he sent them, which Travis does and informs him that the band is working on it.

Jody's pleased to hear it and asks Kai what he thinks of the songs. Kai seems to lack enthusement, saying that while the song is OK it's also commercial. Jody suggests this isn't a bad thing, and that their sound is a bit too garage band.

Kai checks that if they sign with him and sing his song then he'll get them a record deal. Jody says he will overnight and Kai wonders if they do whether it will be them or him who steers their ship.

Travis is surprised by the tone of Kai's questioning, and Jody thinks for a moment before saying that he's invited some guys to the open mic night at Goblins. He says if they play the song then everything will be golden.

He gets up to leave and warns them if they blow it then they'll be gone before the chorus. He then goes, telling them he'll see them in the evening. Agitated, Travis stands up and wonders if Kai is insane over his questions and reminds him that Jody wants to sign them.

Kai insists they have to protect themselves, but Travis warns him that if he screws it up for them then the band and their friendship will be over. He goes, leaving a shocked Kai.

At the yoga class, Erica arrives and greets Julianne. She sits down on the mat next to Julianne, who tells her that she loved the manuscript. Erica thinks this is great, although her face suggests otherwise.

Julianne, spotting this, reiterates that she liked the book and suggests Erica should be happy. Erica insists she is, but says she can't start a business. Julianne can't believe what she's saying and wonders why.

However, before Erica can explain the yoga instructor, Jess, begins the lesson. She instructs them to take things at their own pace and listen to their body. The class begins as Jess tells them to move in different positions.

As they do, she wanders around - checking how everyone is getting on. She notices Erica struggling and tries to help her hold her position and breathe properly. Erica begins gasping for air though and then loses her position and breaks down in tears.

Jess comforts her, rubbing her back, and assuring her that it happens and that Erica's just releasing what she's feeling. Julianne stops, concerned for Erica, who then excuses herself from the class in tears.

Erica tries to make a hasty exit, but Julianne catches up with her outside and tells her to hold up. She asks her what's wrong and Erica admits she doesn't know and is acting insane. Julianne wonders if it's about their plan and the manuscript and wants to know why Erica said she couldn't do it.

She replies that she talked with Ethan and decided that it was too risky, stating that she's barely a junior editor. Julianne tells her to stop, and admits that the previous day she'd been a "Debbie Downer" but she'd then thought about what Erica said and realised she was right.

Julianne says they have an amazing opportunity to do something bigger and enthuses that they're both smart, have had successes, and both want it. She asks Erica to confirm that she wants it, which she does.

She advises Erica that without risk there's no reward, and Erica admits that she's so confused. Julianne takes her hand and asks her to think about it, which Erica agrees to.

Meanwhile, Kai walks down the street when suddenly Dr. Fred walks up behind him. He begins walking with Kai and tells him he looks like a man on a mission. Kai explains that he's done fighting and states that Dr. Fred, Erica, and everybody wants him to finish his regret and he's sick of arguing about it.

He asks him what he's going to do and Kai explains he's going to finish the song and go back. Dr. Fred stops in front of him and says that the question is whether Kai's happy. Kai wonders if he looks happy, stating that his apartment runs out of hot water every morning and he can barely afford to eat.

Kai bemoans how all his friends act like teenagers and how he resents Travis - who now hates him. Dr. Fred guesses that Kai feels like he's made things worse and not better and Kai admits that he's worn down and he now understands that whatever he does he can't save Travis.

Dr. Fred says that therapy isn't about changing the past and never was, provoking an angry response from Kai, who asks what the point of it is. He tells Kai that it's for him to figure out, before walking off.

Elsewhere, Erica sits on a bench, deep in thought. Dr. Tom then approaches and sits down next to her. She waits for him to say something but he doesn't, and she eventually tells him that she's lost.

He pretends to be surprised and jokes that she's only three blocks from her house and points her in the right direction. Erica throws a wearied look at his attempt to be funny and Dr. Tom takes it that she means the other kind of lost.

Erica explains that Ethan's reasons for not opening a business totally make sense, but that what Julianne said also did. She asks Dr. Tom whose advice she should follow. He sighs, then gets up from the bench and, motioning with his head, says he wants to show her something and asks her to come with him.

He walks over towards a wall of a building and removes a stick of chalk from his jacket pocket. Dr. Tom uses the chalk to draw the outline of a door on the wall and Erica watches him, confused, and checking to see if they're being watched.

When finished drawing, Dr. Tom puts the chalk back in his pocket and steps back from the wall. He tells Erica that: "Every wall is a door," and she nods her head in understanding. He then tells her to go ahead and push the outline.

She indulges him and is shocked to discover the wall moving when she pushes it. Excited, Erica pushes harder and finds the outline moving inwards, like a door. Pushing the door all the way open, she steps into a narrow passage, followed by Dr. Tom.

The door closes behind them and they begin to walk down the passage. Erica asks Dr. Tom where they're going, although he simply replies "Where indeed?"

They eventually emerge into a wide hallway, filled with doors of all different kinds and colours. Erica struggles to comprehend her surroundings and Dr. Tom then instructs her to choose a door.

She wonders if she just choose any door, although he doesn't reply. Erica asks him to help her out and give her some context, asking him what she's supposed to do and how does she choose.

Dr. Tom merely quotes to her though: "One day Alice came to a fork in the road and saw a Cheshire Cat. 'Which road do I take?' she asked. 'Where do you want to go?' was his response. 'I don't know,' answered Alice. 'Then,' said the cat, 'It doesn't matter.'"

Erica says she doesn't understand and he tells her it's not complicated as she can't stay in the hallway forever and she has to choose. She laughs nervously at this and wonders how she is supposed to decide.

Dr. Tom asks her which one feels right and she replies that she honestly doesn't know. Suddenly, he turns around and walks quickly towards one of the doors - opens it, enters, and closes the door behind him.

Left alone in the hallway, Erica looks around, unsure of what to do. She calls out to Dr. Tom, asking him to wait, and rushes towards the door he entered. She opens it and finds herself entering his office.

He turns around and, with a rueful smile, remarks that she followed him. Erica wonders where else she was expected to go. Dr. Tom takes this on board and, moving over to his desk, picks up her list and asks her to tell him about 'Silly Fingers.'

She asks him to wait a second, reminding Dr. Tom that he just threw her down the rabbit hole and she has no idea why. Erica asks if they can back up and, removing his jacket, he begins to explain that she had three choices.

He says choice one was choose a door, choice two was to stay in the hallway undecided, or choice three was to follow him. Erica makes her way over to her chair and concedes that she clearly made the wrong choice but only because she doesn't understand what he's trying to tell her.

Sitting down opposite her, Dr. Tom says that's why he wants to discuss 'Silly Fingers' and Erica begins to recount the tale. She says it was in 1999, when she'd just started her Masters programme.

Erica explains that she was working part time as a TA to her thesis advisor - Professor Audrey Hogan. She says she'd fought to get her and then lived to regret it - describing Hogan as brilliant but someone who didn't fool suffer fools and how everyone, including herself, was terrified of her.

She says that whenever Hogan would do something that would stress her out she'd email Cassidy - whose office was just down the hall from hers - and they'd write the most awful things.

Erica recalls how one time Hogan had got her really worked up so she emailed Cassidy, who emailed back. However, instead of hitting reply, she forwarded the message to Hogan by mistake.

She says she didn't even know she'd done it until an hour later when she was called into Hogan's office to be informed she was withdrawing as her thesis advisor, and Erica was formally reprimanded and assigned to a new professor who basically ignored her.

Erica sighs, saying she used to love academics and thrived in that world until her Masters. She says that Hogan and the whole stupid incident tarnished it for her. Leaning forward, Dr. Tom suggests that Erica is saying she might have stayed on and got her PhD.

She says she might have, and he asks her what she'd do differently if she could go back. Erica replies that she obviously wouldn't have sent the email and, at that moment, suddenly finds herself transported back where she's sitting in front of a computer.

Erica stumbles forward in her shock, just managing to avoid clicking the mouse to send the email to Hogan. She gasps in relief but as she gets up from her chair she knocks the desk and a book falls down onto the mouse.

The mouse clicks down and sends the email to Hogan - as Erica exclaims in despair that the email has again been sent. Panicking, she quickly rushes out of her office and into a hallway where she encounters Cassidy.

She grabs Cassidy by the hand and pulls her away from a conversation she's having. Cassidy asks Erica what's wrong and she explains that she accidentally forwarded the email to Hogan rather than replying to her.

Cassidy takes this in and they both rush down the stairs towards Hogan's office. When they arrive there though, they find her secretary is outside her office on the phone. Erica suggests they will have to abort their mission to intercept the email.

However, Cassidy tells her not to worry and removes a folder from her bag before approaching the secretary's desk. She tells her she needs to speak to Hogan, but is informed that she's not in and the secretary asks if she can give her a message.

Cassidy says that Hogan gave her a 'D' on a paper that she can't afford to get. The secretary says she can't help her, at which point Cassidy reaches over and snatches the contacts' book from her desk, saying that she'll have to call Hogan at home herself.

The secretary ends her phone call and rushes towards Cassidy, telling her she can't look in the book. Cassidy asks why, wondering if the secretary is going to call security. Erica realises that, with the secretary distracted, she has the chance to access Hogan's office.

As Cassidy continues to rant to the secretary, Erica sneaks into Hogan's office and goes over to her computer. She finds the email she mistakenly sent in her inbox and deletes it before hurrying out.

She greets Cassidy, who pretends to re-explain her dilemma to Erica - who assures her she's going to be fine and says that they should go. The secretary says Hogan will be back any minute and suggests Cassidy can wait.

Erica guides Cassidy away though, saying it will be better if she cools down. They both leave, agreeing how bad it would have been had Hogan got the email.

Later, during Hogan's lecture, Erica gazes around, not listening, as she takes in being back in familiar surroundings. Hogan talks about The Importance Of Being Earnest and debates with another student.

Hogan then asks Erica what her view is, noticing that she's not been paying attention. Caught out, Erica hesitates before replying that both Hogan and the student have made good points before offering a general comment about the characters.

Unimpressed, Hogan sarcastically thanks her for her summary, but tells Erica that she asked her for her point of view. Erica doesn't know what to say, and Hogan takes this to mean that she doesn't have one.

Afterwards, Erica pays a visit to Hogan's office where she's told they're meeting to discuss her thesis proposal. Erica says she'd like to talk about what happened in class, which surprises Hogan.

She concedes that it's Erica's choice, but informs her that her time is valuable and that, while she could spend it rehashing events from the morning, it would be better spent presenting her proposal.

Erica agrees, and says her thesis will be about hidden feminism in Bronte's Jane Eyre. Hogan is inmoved by this suggestion, but says she isn't going to stand in her way if she wishes to choose the blandest thesis topic.

This description shocks Erica, who says she's put a lot of research into it. Hogan acknowledges that she probably has but that Erica must know that as thesis topics go it's pedestrian, boring, and been done. Erica is dumbfounded, but Hogan tells her her thesis is approved and asks her to leave.

Erica discusses what happened as she walks with Ethan and Cassidy. She states that even though she didn't send the email she swears Hogan hates her even more than before. Cassidy suggests that Hogan is crazy, considering how smart, talented, and adorable she is.

She advises Erica to tell Hogan to shove it, which shocks Ethan. Cassidy argues that just because Hogan has a PhD it doesn't make her a God. She tells Erica to confront her and tell her off.

Ethan says that's the worst idea, although Erica reminds him of how when she stood up to Lozar things had got better. He makes the point that Lozar wasn't the head of the English Department though.

Cassidy can't believe Ethan's attitude, suggesting they teach him blind submission in teacher's college. He wonders why she's chewing his head off, and she replies that university is about passion and original thought and taking a stand - reminding them of the '60s and Vietnam.

Ethan says that most students in the '60s weren't sticking flowers in guns and taking acid trips at Woodstock. He tells Cassidy that they were at university to learn and graduate and get real jobs.

Irritated by his attitude, Cassidy says she has to go. Erica tries to make her stay, but Cassidy says that if everyone was as complacent as Ethan then her and Erica wouldn't even be allowed to go to university.

She leaves, and Ethan suggests to Erica that Cassidy needs to chill out. He tells her that she can't afford to alienate her advisor and she needs to win over Hogan. Exasperated, Erica asks how and says she has no idea what Hogan wants.

Ethan suggests that she asks Hogan and gets her involved. He says that people love being asked for their advice and that that's what he'd do, and Erica considers this advice.

Later on, she catches up with Hogan, who is in a hurry, to talk. They walk and talk as Erica explains that she's been thinking about what what Hogan had said about her thesis. She says the last thing she wants to do is present a topic that's underwhelming.

Hogan enquires if she has another topic in mind and Erica wonders if she has any ideas or suggestions. This comment makes Hogan stop in her place and, astonished, she suggests Erica is asking her to come up with her thesis proposal .

Erica denies this and says she's just asking for some guidance. Hogan disagrees though and suggests Erica is asking her to do the work for her. She asks Erica to remind her why exactly she's in the Masters programme.

She struggles to answer this question before saying she's just trying to give Hogan what she wants. Annoyed, Hogan tells Erica it has nothing to do with her, and that it's her thesis, her degree, and her life.

Hogan tells Erica to figure it out and to do it with another thesis advisor, stating that she doesn't have the time for it. Erica can't believe the turn of events and suggests she can't just quit. Hogan says she can though and walks off leaving her astounded.

The next day, Erica turns up early to see Hogan in the lecture theatre. She asks what Erica is doing there, and she replies that she needs to talk to her. Hogan tells her she's not going to change her mind, which Erica accepts.

Erica asks what she did to make Hogan dislike her. Hogan tells her that Erica never answered the question about why she is in the Masters programme. Erica replies that she needs her degree - but this answer doesn't impress Hogan.

She informs Erica that when she was her age there wasn't one tenured female professor in the faculty, but that she didn't care because she knew this was what she was meant to do.

She wonders if Erica knows how frustrating it is to watch students wasting years hiding out at university when they could be pursuing their dreams. Erica asks how Hogan knows she's hiding out and she replies because Erica can't answer the most basic question of why she's there.

Erica, once more, struggles to reply, and Hogan tells her she's a bright girl and asks what she wants to do with her life. After thinking, Erica eventually replies that she wants to be an editor and publish books and, suddenly having got clarity, that she wants to start her own company - as crazy as it sounds.

Impressed, Hogan explains how thirty years ago she'd told her father that one day she wanted to chair the English Department he laughed in her face. She advises Erica to leave the degrees to the academics and to follow her heart - and not let anyone try and stop her.

Inspired by this, Erica smiles to herself and begins to walk away. She turns around and thanks Hogan who tells her she's welcome. Erica walks out of the lecture theatre but finds herself passing out of the wall through the chalk outlined door in the present day.

Almost immediately, she gets her cell phone out of her bag and calls Julianne, and asks her what she's doing.

They meet up for a coffee and Erica says that if her crazy nervous breakdown didn't put her off the idea that she'd still really like to go into business together. Julianne reminds her that in the morning Erica was saying it was all too risky and now she's saying it's peachy, and asks her what the deal is.

Erica says that Ethan convinced her that it was a bad idea, and Julianne suggests that maybe it is for him, but that he's not her. She wonders what this means, and Julianne says that Ethan isn't exactly Jean Claude Van Damme and that he plays it pretty safe, although Erica insists he'll come around.

Julianne accepts this and says she just wants to make sure before she says yes that Erica isn't going to change her mind again or let Ethan change it for her. Erica promises and they hug one another, excited, and Julianne tells her how stoked she is, referring to Erica as her partner.

Back home, Erica is working at her desk when there's a knock at the door. She checks through the spy hole to see who's there before opening the door to Kai. She asks what he's doing there and he acknowledges that she said she needed her space.

Kai says he's not there to get in her way, but he needs to tell her something. Erica asks him what's wrong and he explains that he's finished his regret and writing Alien Like You but is still in 2009. Her wonders why he's still stuck in the past.

Inside her apartment, Kai explains how he doesn't understand and wonders if Dr. Fred is messing with him and if it's some kind of test. Erica, pouring a glass of water, says that everything is a test with therapists and she wonders what made him finally go through with the regret.

Kai says when he first got back things were great - Travis was alive and there was no money or drugs. Erica concludes that he made the decision to stay and Kai confirms so, saying it was great for a while but he now feels like he's messing it up with the band and Travis.

He says he keeps trying to change things and it's not working, and Erica tells him that therapy isn't really about changing the past. Kai replies that this is what Dr. Fred said, and she tells him it's true and that you learn that little lesson pretty quick.

Frustrated, Kai asks what the point is and what they want him to do. Erica suggests that it's called therapy for a reason. She says that changing the past is easy but changing yourself is much harder.

She tells him that he needs figure out why he's really here. Kai wonders how and says he has no idea. Erica suddenly has a thought and moves a chair from the table and positions it opposite her desk.

He asks what she's doing and Erica replies that she's helping him. She invites him to sit down, prompting him to call her "Dr. Erica." She asks him to indulge her and they sit down facing one another on opposite sides of the desk.

Erica suggests they go back to the beginning and, putting on a Freudian/Austrian accent, asks him to explain why Alien Like You was a regret. Kai says that if they're going to talk about it then she has to act like a normal person and Erica apologises for getting a little carried away.

He explains that the song was honest and was how he felt when he wrote it. Kai says he wasn't trying to please anyone or sell records. Erica suggests that he was just being true to himself, which he agrees with.

Erica thinks for a bit and says that if she was Dr. Tom then she would say, quoting Shakespeare: "This above all, to all thine own self be true." She admits it sounds so much better when he does it, but Kai gets what she's saying.

She asks him how he can be true to himself in his current situation and what he can do. Kai stops to consider and suddenly has a dawning.

That evening, Kai and Erica go to a packed Goblins and he suggests he should go and find his band mates. He asks her if it all works and he goes back what it will be like when he gets there. She replies that it will be the same for the most part.

Kai asks if he'll remember everything and her. She confirms so, which he's pleased to hear. He asks whether he should look her up in the future and Erica pleads with him not to and, if he does, not to tell her as it would be too weird to think about it.

She adds that she'd be 40, and he jokes that she'd actually be 42. Erica smiles and tells him she's going to miss him. He assures her she's going to be fine and reminds her that she has Ethan. Erica nods her head and Kai suggests she won't even notice he's gone.

Emotional, she says she will. He tries to comfort her but Erica kisses him on the cheek. She tells Kai to go and find his band mates and that she'll come and see him afterwards and he leaves.

On stage, Dave introduces Head as Erica and Jody watch on. Kai makes his way to the mic, but not before putting his arm around Travis and apologising for letting him down of late. Travis tells him not to worry about it and they hug.

Kai's behaviour prompts Travis to ask him if he's OK, and Kai insists he's great and he addresses the crowd over the mic, asking them how they're doing. He tells them he's going to play a song called Alien Like You.

This surprises Travis and Jody bows his head at the news. Kai explains that it took him a while to finish the song and they're the first ones to hear it in its entirety. He gets ready to play, but before he can Travis puts his hand over the mic and questions what Kai is doing.

Kai rebuffs him though and begins to play and sing. Erica and Jody watch on, intrigued, as Kai sings and, eventually, Travis begins to play along with him.

As she listens, Erica reflects upon the time she's spent with Kai - from their first meeting, to the do-over day where he ended up kissing her, and their many encounters at Goblins. When Kai finishes she enthusiastically applauds along with the rest of the audience.

Afterwards, Jody talks to the band and tells them to hire a lawyer as they'll have to sign some contracts the next day. He shakes Kai's hand, as he tells them he has balls for choosing to play his own song like that.

At that moment, Kai appears to change and Travis hugs and congratulates him. Erica then comes bounding up to him, calling his name, grabbing him by the hand, and telling him how incredible it was.

He gives her a vague look as he politely thanks her though. Erica tells him it was perfect and that she's so glad he sung the song. Kai continues to look blankly at her though and, telling her he doesn't mean to be rude, explains that he has a terrible memory for names.

Erica realises that he doesn't know her and that the Kai she knew has been transported back to the future. She hides her disappointment as Kai asks her who she is and she tells him she's nobody and just a fan. He thanks her and she walks off and glances back to see Kai celebrating with his band mates.

Back at her apartment, she returns home to find Ethan sitting on the couch, reading, and he asks where she was. Erica apologises for not leaving a message, explaining that she got caught up and before she knew it, it was late.

Ethan says that if she didn't have dinner that there's leftover pasta in the fridge which he can heat up if she's hungry. She replies that she's not really hungry though and sits down next to him on the couch.

Erica explains that there's lots going on in her head and she needs to talk about it. Ethan puts down his book as she begins to tells him how she met with Julianne and how she's going into business with her.

He takes this in and wonders what she expects him to say. Erica says she wants him to say he understands and that he gets how much it means to her. Ethan says he can't, as he doesn't understand why she wants to take on that kind of stress and turn her life upside down.

Erica replies that it's exciting and challenging and, while she know he's just looking out for her, pleads with him to back her up on it. Ethan shakes his head and apologises, and she reminds him it's her career.

He gets up from the couch and tells her it's their life together and that they have to start thinking about the future and what they want. Erica accepts this and asks what exactly that is. Ethan replies that it's not this or her running from job to job - getting fired one day and opening a business the next.

Erica begins to explain that if the situation was reversed and he guesses that she'd support him and that she thinks he's being a shitty boyfriend because he's being honest. She denies that's what she's saying but he tells her that the situation wouldn't be reversed because he wouldn't do it.

She understands this to mean that there's nothing else he wants and that he's got it all. Ethan replies that he's got a career he loves, and friends, and - sitting back down beside Erica - says he has her.

Erica asks him about ten years time, and he suggests they'd be married, have kids, a dog, and a house. She listens to this description, stony-faced. He says he'll still be teaching and she'd be working and life is simple and they'd be happy.

She lets out a big sigh when she hears this and puts her face in her hands. Ethan puts his hand on her shoulder and asks if she's crying. Erica insists she isn't, but gets up from the couch. She tells him she's freaking out and he says that he thought that she wanted it.

Erica admits that she did, but that right now they're in completely different places. Ethan shakes his head in disbelief and Erica continues saying there's a voice inside her telling her something she doesn't want to hear.

Ethan tries to interject, as she explains how she's trying so hard not to hear it. He listens in silence as Erica concludes that she doesn't think they're right for each other. Ethan finds this incredulous.

She sits back down and, struggling to contain her emotions, says there's no amount of talking that's going to fix it and that it's a fundamental difference between them.

Erica says whether it's their sex life, or her career, or the future, that every time she tries to step outside the box a little it's like he tries to keep pushing her in. She finally tells Ethan that she thinks they should break up.

Astounded and trying not to cry, Ethan tells her not to and suggests that she's overreacting and that they're just having a conversation. He says that you don't just give up, but she interrupts him to insists she's not giving up.

She warns that if they keep going they're going to keep pulling in different directions until they tear apart. Ethan bows his head and struggles to hold back the tears. Erica says that even though she can't stand the thought of him not in her life she can't keep shutting out the voice inside telling her they aren't right.

Ethan says he can't believe what's happening and Erica tells him how sorry she is. They both cry and she keeps apologising as he struggles to look at her. Eventually she hugs him and holds him against her.

That evening, they lie next to one another on the bed, both struggling to sleep. The next morning, Ethan packs up his belongings and leaves the apartment. Erica cries to herself on the bed and over time packs his things into a box and adapts to him being gone.

Judith pays her a visit to cheer her up and they go out to Goblins. When they arrive, she asks if Erica is sure she wants to have drinks there, but Erica says it's fine and she insists that it has a lot of good memories.

Erica goes to find them a table as Judith offers to buy the drinks - which Erica jokes is a good thing seeing as she's unemployed. As she sits down, Dr. Fred approaches her table and joins her.

He tells her that he won't find Kai there and she replies that for some reason she kind of knew that. Dr. Fred explains that Kai quit yesterday when Jody signed the band and that he's already got them working on their line-up for V Fest.

Erica thinks this is fast and Dr. Fred says Jody's striking while the iron is hot. She asks him about the Kai she knows, and he informs her that he's adjusting, suggesting she remembers what it was like, which she admits she does. He thanks her for her help and leaves.

Later, Erica walks home alone, passing the wall where the chalk outlined door that Dr. Tom drew still remains. She stops and looks at it and then slowly advances towards it. She decides to re-enter the hallway of doors and finds Dr. Tom waiting there for her.

He greets her and she asks him where he's been. Dr. Tom says he's been waiting until she was ready. Erica begins to walk towards him, explaining that she broke up with Ethan - which he tells her he knows.

She adds that Kai has gone back to where he belongs, and she now has no job and no boyfriend. Dr. Tom asks her how that feels and Erica admits it feels scary but strangely OK. He smiles and asks her why that is.

Erica says that talking to Ethan made her realise how much she's changed. She tells Dr. Tom that everything he's taught her has made her braver somehow and that fear no longer holds her back but actually motivates her, wondering if that makes sense.

Dr. Tom smiles to himself and takes a deep breath. Looking around the hallway, he walks away from Erica and tells her that: "We cannot teach people anything, we can only help them discover it within themselves."

She smiles and he tells her it's time. Dr. Tom instructs Erica to, once more, choose a door. She begins to look around at the doors before selecting an old-looking wooden door. She opens it, steps inside, and closes it behind her and he watches her walk in.